


Maybe I Don't

by raiseyourpinky



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Coworkers - Freeform, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Romance, F/F, F/M, M/M, Office Romance, Office employees, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2019-01-02
Packaged: 2019-05-24 17:39:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 42,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14959095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raiseyourpinky/pseuds/raiseyourpinky
Summary: For the past three years, Dean and Castiel have been cubicle neighbors at a customer service call center. The only thing they have in common is that they absolutely hate each other. Or do they?





	1. Chapter 1

Dean hated Castiel.

Dean hated his stupid, stuck-up, wild-haired, blue-eyed coworker. He hated the way he sat up perfectly straight in his chair, at the cubicle next to Dean. The way he scrunched his nose every time Dean pulled out a Pop-tart and ate it in front of him. The way he used his fake polite voice during his customer service calls. Most of all, Dean hated the way Castiel treated him.

For all his qualities at work, Castiel lacked social skills. Nobody at the office liked him. _Nobody_. Dean was convinced that the only reason he’d gotten stuck at the back corner of the floor right next to Castiel was because his boss hated him. A few years ago, Dean had hooked up with Lisa, a beautiful woman Crowley had been after. Lisa would have never paid any attention to an old man like Crowley, but that didn’t make him any less delusional.

So, due to a small one-night stand three years ago, Dean had to pay by sitting next to the most obnoxious, unlikable individual on the customer service floor. The punishment did _not_ fit the crime.

The one good thing that had come from this seating arrangement was that nobody ever bothered Dean. He was sharing a very small space with the devil’s spawn, sure, but everyone else knew to keep their distance. Dean wasn’t as antisocial as Castiel, but he still didn’t want to put on fake smiles to please the crowds. Being here, in his secluded corner, wasn’t so bad. As long as he pretended Castiel wasn’t there.

In their three years working together, Dean had picked up on a few things about Castiel. In between calls, there was nothing else to do but learn about his coworker. For one, Castiel always wore the same blue tie. Without fail, the same blue tie, never tied correctly, but tied nonetheless. It was a constant struggle for Dean not to reach out and fix it for him. Dear God, did Castiel grow up in a barn?

Another thing about Castiel: he loved cats. Or at least, _his_ cat. The only reason Dean even knew Castiel had a cat was because he kept a picture of the black cat framed on his desk. One day, Dean had asked what the cat’s name was, just out of simple curiosity. Castiel had glared at him for a moment before saying, “Sebastian.” That was the end of that conversation.

Castiel always ate healthy. He brought salads from home almost every day, and he never snacked throughout the day. A few times he’d come to work in a bike, without breaking a sweat. Dean was pretty sure Castiel was one of those disturbing people who jogged _for fun_.

The one good thing about Castiel, if there was any, was that he gave as good as he took.

This morning, as Dean made the long walk to his corner, mumbling weak hellos and good mornings, he saw Castiel’s black hair peeking out of the cubicle wall. Before Dean even sat down, Castiel was already looking up and smiling. It was the same every day. A big, bright smile. At first, Dean had been completely confused. The guy appeared to be nice, so why did everyone hate him?

And then he spoke.

“Good morning, loser,” Castiel said, greeting Dean the same way he had for three years.

Dean grinned in response. “Morning, dickhead. How’s your day going? Killed anyone yet?”

The smile vanished. Eyebrows furrowed. “I’ve thought about it.”

“What, just now?” Dean asked, setting down his messenger bag by his feet, and plopping down on his chair. “I just got here. Can’t you give me a bit of a head start?”

“I’ve given you three years,” Castiel said, turning back to his notebook. Another thing about Castiel: he loved to draw. Dean had caught glimpses of his sketches, and they were pretty decent. Not that he’d ever tell him that.

Dean hummed. “Well, can it wait until lunch? I’m dreading eating my tuna sandwich, so you’d actually be doing me a favor.”

For a short second, Castiel smirked before his glare returned. “Then we have a deal.”

The rest of the morning went by smoothly. After putting on his headset, the phone calls fired up Dean’s phone. Working customer service for a shitty finance company was not easy, but the day usually went by quickly. There were many angry customers, but over the years, Dean had grown used to calming them down and making them happy with a few kind words and quick solutions. In between his calls, Dean snacked on anything chocolate. He had a big container full of mini Snickers and Kit-Kats, of which he constantly stocked up on. Sometimes, when he was feeling nice, he’d offer some to Castiel, just to see him scoff.

“I do hope I was of help, Mrs. Rodriguez,” Castiel spoke into his headset. “No, thank you. Have a wonderful day.” There was a big sigh when the call was over.

“Long day?” Dean asked, peeling another Snickers.

“Only because I have to look at you.”

Dean snorted. “Why are you so obsessed with me, man?”

Castiel put his pencil down and turned to Dean, raising an eyebrow. “You flatter yourself.”

“Well, not every response you give me needs to be about me. That’s all I’m saying.” Dean motioned to the notebook. “What are you working on, anyway?”

“Nothing I’d like to share.” Castiel stared at Dean for a few more seconds before taking off his headset. “Do _not_ peak into my belongings.”

With that, Castiel grabbed his lunch bag and headed into the breakroom, walking with more confidence than any given celebrity.

Dean shrugged, took off his headset, and clocked out for lunch. He thought about looking at the notebook, but he realized that if their roles were reversed, he wouldn’t want Castiel to look into his stuff.

They usually ate lunch at the same time. Around 1:15, the noon crowd had dispersed back to their desks. That left Dean and Castiel to eat on opposite ends of the break room. It would make sense to sit and eat together, but Dean had stopped trying that after the first week. It was impossible to play nice with someone who lived to antagonize him.

Castiel ate in complete silence, hardly ever looking up from his rabbit food. Dean, on the other hand, was loud. He used his lunch time to catch up on his shows, and that lead to pretty loud reactions. Even though he used headphones, it was hard to contain his own sounds. Every time Dean laughed or gasped, Castiel shot him a glare. Dean rolled his eyes in response. He’d given up fighting back during lunch. This was his alone time. Sort of.

Dean removed his headphones after the episode of _Crazy Ex-Girlfriend_ he was watching ended. Despite the awful title, Dean had given the show a try after Charlie recommended it. It was a self-aware, hilarious sitcom in the style of a musical. Dean couldn’t get enough of it.

“Oh good, you’re done,” Castiel said from his corner of the break room.

“For the last time, man, I can’t hold in my laughter,” Dean said, picking up his trash. “The show’s too good not to laugh.”

“I doubt any show you watch is good.”

“Ouch. That hurt.” Dean tossed away his trash, standing closer to Castiel’s table.

“Leave me alone.”

“Impossible. We’re cubicle neighbors.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Can’t I ever eat in peace?”

“Not if you keep eating at the same time I eat.” Dean grinned.

Castiel held his gaze, blue eyes intense. “I will not change my lunch time. You should change yours.”

“I’m not changing my lunch time.”

“Then keep quiet when you eat.”

Dean laughed. “I’m not doing that either.”

Castiel let out a loud groan before he threw away his trash as well. With another glare at Dean, he walked out of the break room.

Another thing about Castiel: he _really_ hated Dean.

 

***

 

Most of the time, Dean took his fifteen-minute breaks at his desk. The break room was usually packed with employees also taking their breaks, and Dean didn’t want to socialize over a cup of coffee. Instead, he spent his time reading. He was currently in the middle of the _Angelfall_ trilogy. It was an action packed young adult series starring a kickass young girl who had to face an army of angels that brought upon the apocalypse. Susan Ee was such a genius author. The one thing he still couldn’t wrap his head around was the romance between the main character and the rogue angel. Truth be told, the angel was growing on him. Slowly.

Sometimes, Castiel took his breaks at the same time as Dean’s, but he spent his time with his notebook. Probably planning the perfect way to murder Dean and get away with it.

“Didn’t peg you for an angel enthusiast,” Castiel muttered, still sketching.

Dean was so invested in his book that he didn’t immediately respond. And when he did, he didn’t have a witty comeback. “Yeah, they’re okay.”

“What is that, a romance?”

“Something like that.” Dean was now the one getting annoyed at being interrupted. His fifteen minutes were up soon, and he was in the middle of a fight scene.

Castiel snorted. “I find angels annoying. Maybe because I was named after one.”

“What?” Dean put his book down, tucking his bookmark inside. This was definitely more interesting than his book.

Castiel didn’t lift his head or pencil up from his notebook as he spoke. “Castiel is another name for Cassiel, the angel of solitude and tears.”

“How fitting.”

Castiel ignored that. “My brothers are named after the archangels Michael and Gabriel.”

“What’s with the holy names?”

“Do you really care, or are you trying to get more information to mock me with later?” Castiel asked, turning his gaze on Dean.

Dean shrugged. “A little of both.”

With a sigh, Castiel returned his attention back to his notebook. “I don’t know. My parents must have liked angels. None of us were briefed on the significance behind our names.”

“There’s a Gabriel in my book,” Dean said. “He’s dead.”

“Good to know.” Castiel sighed, closing his notebook and picking up his headset. Soon after, the calls started coming.

The day went on as usual. Dean got through over a hundred customer service calls, and he was beat. It was five minutes to 5 p.m., and Dean was just about to end his current call, when he noticed Charlie making her way to him. The back row of cubicles was poorly lit and rarely visited, especially because there were only two people there. But Charlie was one of the few people who was brave enough to make the journey.

“Alright, ma’am, I’m glad that solved your issue,” Dean spoke into his headset. “Have a lovely day. Take care now.”

Dean hung up and put away his headset before he got another call. When he turned, Charlie was standing behind Castiel, looking over his shoulder at whatever was on his notebook. There was a curious look in her eyes. Her red hair was up on a ponytail, and she was wearing her favorite Gryffindor sweater. Charlie worked on the second floor in the IT department. She rarely visited the customer service floor, unless her skills were desperately needed. She said it depressed her. Dean didn’t blame her.

“You heading out?” Dean asked, clocking out for the day.

Charlie finally took her eyes off of Castiel’s notebook and turned to Dean with a smile. “Yeah, I thought I’d walk out with you. Maybe chat a little.”

Dean grinned. “You made any progress with Jo?”

Charlie sighed and crossed her arms. “Let’s walk and talk. I have a lot to fill you in from here to the parking lot.”

“Great, let’s go. I’m all done here.” Dean grabbed his messenger bag and stood up. He noticed Castiel was still sketching in his notebook. “Hey, dude, aren’t you gonna clock out? It’s past 5.”

“I already did,” Castiel mumbled, not looking up.

“So, what, are you camping out at your desk?”

Castiel didn’t reply.

“You want to walk out with us?” Charlie asked, and then shrugged when Dean shot her an alarming look. The last thing Dean wanted was to spend even more time with the arrogant dickhead.

“No,” Castiel said.

“Let’s just go,” Dean said. “He loves being the biggest jerk in the office.”

“Dean, come on,” Charlie said.

“See ya tomorrow, dickhead.”

Castiel didn’t reply, which wasn’t unusual, so Dean left it at that.

As they walked to the elevator, Charlie started filling Dean in on all her attempts at flirting with one of the new hires. Jo was also in IT, and apparently wore a Slytherin sweater, which had immediately drawn Charlie to her. But Charlie had only managed to compliment her sweater once, and still hadn’t figured out what else to do to start up a conversation.

“Why don’t you talk about Harry Potter?” Dean said, since it appeared to be the simplest solution.

“Oh, no, I can’t do that.” Charlie widened her eyes, stepping into the elevator. “If I talk Harry Potter, she’ll know my obsession is hardcore, and it’ll scare her away. I need something safer. But I just can’t figure out what other interests she has. She doesn’t talk much. She just sits there and does her job. Can you believe that? Who does that?”

“Uh, me.”

Charlie laughed. “Yeah, right. Don’t you spend like half your day arguing with Castiel?”

Dean groaned. “The guy’s an asshole. If I don’t argue with him, I’ll explode. I swear, everything I do annoys him. And vice versa.”

“Maybe he’s just quiet.”

Dean snorted, stepping out of the elevator with Charlie. “Charlie, please. I’ve known the guy for three years. He’s anything but quiet. And when he talks, he spills venom.”

Charlie rolled her eyes. “Save me the dramatics, Dean. But anyway, did you see what he was drawing today?”

“No, he’s so private about that stuff. You’d think it’s a national secret he’s keeping in there or something.”

“I caught a peak.” Charlie smiled. “I think he was drawing an angel.”

“What?” Dean stopped on his tracks.

“I saw the wings and everything.”

“But he hates angels. He said so himself.”

Charlie shrugged. “Maybe he changed his mind.”

“I think Cas is pretty set on the things he hates. I would know. I’m at the top of his hate list.”

“Hate list? What is this, high school?” Charlie chuckled. “Also, if you hate him so much you wouldn’t have your very own nickname for him. You’re literally the only person in the entire building who calls him anything other than Castiel.”

“Oh, I have many names for him. Dickhead is my favorite.”

They arrived to Charlie’s car, and she pulled out her keys to unlock it. “Whatever you say, Dean. Listen, you gotta help me come up with topics of conversation for me and Jo. I really like this girl. But she’s been here for two weeks, and I still haven’t said more than one sentence to her.”

“I’ll try to think of something,” Dean promised, “although, I still think Harry Potter is a good conversation starter.”

Charlie looked unimpressed. “You clearly don’t know anything about the true love of fandom.”

“Clearly not, but I’m slowly learning.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow. Text me all of your brilliant ideas.”

“I’ll try not to break your phone.”

And with that, Dean headed for his car on the other side of the parking lot. His beautiful Chevy Impala was shiny under the sunlight, and Dean grinned at the sight. His good mood quickly faded when he noticed the person heading to the car parked next to his. Castiel walked with his chin lifted, a permanent frown on his face. Dean had never met a grumpier person.

“Couldn’t have parked anywhere else, dude?” Dean asked over the top of his Impala.

Castiel unlocked his car, his back to Dean. “I’m free to park wherever I please. If it’ll make you feel better, you can file a complaint to HR.”

“You know this is my car, right? I mean, you’ve seen me driving it plenty of times.”

“As much as I’d like to stay and listen to your obnoxious whining, I have to go.” Castiel opened his car door. Before he climbed in, he turned to Dean. “Unfortunately, I will see you tomorrow.”

“Lucky you,” Dean said. “I’m an angel.”

Castiel narrowed his eyes.

Dean laughed, climbing inside his own car.


	2. Chapter 2

The next day, Dean was several minutes late due to a car wreck on the freeway. When he got to his desk, Castiel was in the middle of a phone call. He was using his kind voice, which was odd to hear considering he’d never used it on Dean.

Dean was catching his breath as he clocked in. He was exactly twenty minutes late. He hoped it wouldn’t warrant a talk from Crowley. Dean didn’t like going to his office. It smelled like mustard and feet. Not to mention the fact that Dean still didn’t get a long with his boss after the Lisa incident. Crowley held grudges long term.

“You’re very late,” Castiel said, apparently having ended his call already. “Crowley asked for you.”

“Shit. I got stuck in traffic.”

“Did I ask?” Castiel lifted an eyebrow.

Dean ignored him. “Is Crowley in his office?”

“How should I know? I’ve been working.”

“Thanks for being so helpful this morning,” Dean said, feigning a smile. “It’s what I needed to continue my lucky streak.”

“Anytime.”

Dean sat at his desk for a few seconds, contemplating what he was about to do. Then he got up and went in search for Crowley.

The office door was open, but Dean knocked on it anyway.

“Dean,” Crowley said, looking up. “Come in. Close the door behind you.”

The pungent scent in the room filled his nostrils, and Dean did his best not to cringe. He closed the door and sat across from Crowley. The older man had a thick British accent, and a bit of scruff. He wasn’t hideous, but his personality could use some work.

“Sorry I was late this morning,” Dean said, getting straight to the point. The less time he spent in here, the better.

“I’m sure you have a valid excuse.”

“I do.” Dean swallowed. “There was an accident on the freeway, slowed down traffic. I usually take the back roads, but I didn’t today. It was a bad call.”

Crowley grinned at him, flashing his teeth. The sight sent chills down Dean’s spine. His boss was intimidating as hell, even with something as simple as a grin. “Well, we all learn from our mistakes, don’t we?”

“Of course.”

“However, I wanted to talk to you about another matter entirely,” Crowley said.

“Oh.” Not what he’d been expecting, but he was curious. He leaned forward on his seat. “What’s going on, sir?”

“It’s come to my attention—better yet, the attention of my boss—that your customer service scores have been perfect for the past six months.”

Dean blinked, taken aback by the direction the conversation had taken. “That’s…right, yes.”

“Well done, Dean. Not many can say that for themselves.”

“I do my best, sir.”

“I see that.” Crowley cleared his throat. “Which is why, despite your lateness today, I wanted to let you know that you have been given a raise.”

“Really?” Definitely not what he’d been expecting from this conversation.

“Yes, really.”

“That’s awesome, thank you.”

“No need to thank me. You’ve earned it.” There was that menacing grin again. “At least that’s what corporate believes.”

Dean wiped his sweaty palms on his pants. “Was there anything else?”

“That’s everything. And you better not be late again.”

“Of course not.” Dean stood up. “Well, better get to work.”

“Leave the door open, would you?”

Dean nodded, hurrying to his desk. When he sat down, Castiel was off the phone, busy sketching in his notebook. Dean couldn’t resist the urge to brag about his unexpected good news. “Hey, Cas, guess what?”

“I’d rather not guess.”

“I just got a raise.”

Castiel dropped his pencil and stared at Dean. “Excuse me?”

“I got a raise!” Dean beamed.

“You were twenty minutes late this morning, and you got a raise? How is that possible?”

Dean shrugged. “I’m a great employee, that’s how.”

“No, you’re not. I should know. I’ve listened to your calls.”

“I’m the best, and I got a raise. Don’t worry, jealousy is only natural.”

Castiel glared at him. “I am _not_ jealous.”

“Keep telling yourself that.”

“Have I mentioned lately that I hate you?”

Dean smiled. “Not recently, no. But the feeling is mutual.”

“Dumbo,” Castiel muttered.

Dean laughed. Castiel hadn’t called him “Dumbo” in quite a while. Dean used to hate being called dumbo, but when he pretended he liked the nickname, Castiel dropped it. Now it was back, and Dean was secretly happy about it. It was like seeing an old friend again after a long time apart.

The rest of the morning went by without either of them killing each other. Dean knew the day would come when one of them gave in and strangled the other, but that day was not today. In fact, Castiel had been quiet ever since Dean told him about his raise. He’d spent his time on his notebook in between calls. Occasionally, Dean caught him checking the clock on the wall, and sighing when he saw the time. Today was a slow day. And slow days meant long days. Not that Dean enjoyed his customer service calls. There were awful people in the world, and many of them had called his customer service line.

On the other hand, Dean preferred dealing with tedious customers over dealing with the slowness of the clock. There were still thirty minutes until lunch time, and Dean was out of things to do. He’d spent the last thirty minutes reading blog posts, but he was sick of them by now.

And then, by some miracle, he spotted Bela crossing the floor. No, it couldn’t be. But it was. Bela was heading over to talk to him. Obviously, Bela wanted to talk to Dean. No one ever visited Castiel back here.

Bela was tall and beautiful. She had a perfect smile that was often contagious, and she wore stylish pant suits. Dean had flirted with her a few times here and there, but it had never led to anything. This was a pleasant surprise, though.

“Dean, I’m glad you’re off the phone.” Bela stood in between Dean and Castiel’s cubicle, blocking Castiel from Dean’s line of sight. Which also brought Bela that much closer to Dean.

“You kidding? I’ve been off the phone for a while. Slow day.”

Bela laughed, something loud and confident. Her hand fell on Dean’s shoulder for a moment, giving it a short squeeze. “Tell me about it. Listen, I came to invite you for drinks at the Roadhouse after work. A few of us are going, so I thought I’d ask.”

Dean frequented the Roadhouse. Not so much lately, because drinking alone at a bar was sad. But this was a great excuse to visit his favorite bar—and not look like a sad loser. “Hell yeah, count me in. Who else is going?”

“Well, Kevin and Chuck are definitely going. Benny said maybe, but Pamela will be there after she goes home to change. I told her none of us are changing out of our getups, but you know how she is. Always needs to drink in her leather jackets.”

Yeah, Dean knew Pamela’s look very well. They’d hooked up a couple of times, and it’d been fun, but that’s all it ever was with Pamela. A fun time. “Sounds good. I guess I’ll see you there.”

“Fantastic.” The hand was back on Dean’s shoulder. “I’m looking forward to spending time with you, Dean.”

“Me too.” Dean threw her his best smile. It’d been a while since he’d been with anyone, but he still remembered how to flirt.

Bela turned to leave, but she stopped when she noticed Castiel. As if she hadn’t seen him at all before. “Oh. Hi.”

“Can I help you?” Castiel asked, eyebrow raised. There was something different about him. Dean watched him carefully, running his eyes up and down until he noticed what had changed. Castiel had loosened his blue tie. Dean resisted the urge to reach out and fix it.

“Oh, this is awkward,” Bela said, looking from Castiel to Dean. “Sorry, I forgot to invite your friend.”

Dean cackled. Actually cackled. “My friend? You’re not serious. Cas is _not_ my friend.”

Castiel threw him an unimpressed look.

Bela shifted on her feet. “Well, the offer is open, if you want to go.”

“No,” Castiel said, still staring at Dean.

“Okay, well, I should get back to my desk,” Bela said, smiling back at Dean. “I’ll see you later.”

“See ya,” Dean said. He locked eyes with Castiel. They were officially having a stare-down. Dean was good at those.

Now that he had him face to face, Dean noticed that Castiel’s stubble was growing. If his guess was right, Castiel hadn’t shaved in two days. His tie was still messed up, and Dean wanted to point it out somehow, but not now, because he was still having a stare-down.

“Why are you such a dickhead to my friends?” Dean asked.

Castiel tilted his head. “Your friends? Since when are those people your friends? You rarely speak to them.”

Fair point, but Dean was not about to let Castiel be right about something. “They’re my friends. Something you’re clearly not. And there’s no need to be a jackass all the time.”

“Does it bother you because you’re trying to sleep with Bela?” Castiel asked, squinting.

Dean scoffed. “None of your damn business, dude.”

“That’ll be a nice date, together with all of your _friends_.”

“It’s not a date,” Dean said, and then stopped himself. “Why am I giving you any explanations?”

“I don’t know. I don’t care what you do.”

“Good,” Dean said. “I don’t care what you do either.”

“Why are we still having this conversation?”

“I don’t fucking know.” Dean sighed. “Fix your damn tie.”

Castiel looked confused for a second, and then he looked down at his tie. “I won’t fix my tie for you, dumbo. I’m closer to reporting you to HR for cursing in the workplace.”

“Do whatever you want,” Dean said, turning back to his computer.

 

***

 

When the clock stroke 5, Dean was ready to go. The Roadhouse was waiting for him. _Bela_ was waiting for him. He got in the elevator and pressed the button for the first floor, but just as the doors were closing, a hand reached out to open them. Castiel entered the elevator, chin raised high, blue tie still crooked.

Great. Dean was forced to spend even more time with the jerk.

There was a strange, whirring noise right before the elevator stopped moving.

“Oh, for crying out loud!” Dean yelled, pressing the button labeled Call.

“Hello, is there a problem?” a voice spoke from the speaker.

“The elevator seems to be stuck,” Dean said. “We were on the fourth floor, going down to the first. Can you get it back up and running?”

“Someone from maintenance will take care of it right away,” the voice said. “Hang in there.”

“Not like we have another option,” Dean said.

This was perfect. Just perfect. Getting stuck in an elevator with Castiel on the day that he had plans with a beautiful woman. Dean pulled out his phone to check for a signal, but he had none. At least the elevator wasn’t packed. Most people took the stairs, to be healthy and whatever. But Dean wouldn’t trek down four floors of stairs. No way in hell.

When he turned to acknowledge Castiel, he had to look down. Castiel was crouched on the floor, his knees pulled up to his chest and his face buried between his legs.

Dean stood there watching him for a few seconds, unsure of what he was seeing. Was Castiel freaking out over this? Or was he, like, meditating or something?

“Hey, Cas, what are you doing?” Dean asked.

“Leave me alone,” Castiel mumbled, sounding short of breath.

Dean crouched down to his eye level, but Castiel didn’t lift up his head. “Is something wrong? Are you…I mean, are you claustrophobic?”

“I said, leave me alone.” Castiel still sounded pretty winded. Dean wasn’t sure how to comfort someone like him. But he couldn’t just stand here while Castiel was having some sort of panic attack.

“Help will be here soon,” Dean reminded him. “Why don’t you just talk to me while we get out of here? Get it out of your mind, huh?”

Castiel was silent.

“Come on, Cas, it’ll help. Just tell me something. Whatever you want.”

Castiel lifted his head. His face was red and a little sweaty. He swallowed. “If you’re going to use this to tease me later, I’d rather you leave me alone.”

Dean shook his head, moving to sit on the opposite end of the elevator. “I wouldn’t do that. I’m not that cruel.”

“It’s getting so hot in here,” Castiel mumbled, still breathless.

“Take off your jacket,” Dean suggested.

Castiel let out a shaky breath, but then he shrugged out of his jacket, and loosened his tie even more. “Of all the people, I had to be stuck here with you.”

“Hey, I’m being nice,” Dean said.

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why are you being nice?”

Dean shrugged. “You’re clearly not enjoying this. I don’t need to make it worse.”

Castiel nodded. “I need water.”

Dean fished his water bottle out of his messenger bag and offered it to Castiel. “It’s cold.”

After hesitating, Castiel took the water from Dean and took a few gulps. Then he returned it. “Thanks.”

“You can have some more.”

“I don’t want to have the need to use the bathroom.”

“Good point.” Dean took the bottle back.

“I’m sure you hate being stuck here with me instead of being on your date.”

Dean laughed softly. “I can’t say I’m loving it here, but I’ll make it there eventually. Just worry about yourself for now.”

“I’m not worried about you,” Castiel said. “I was pointing out a positive thing.”

Same old Castiel. “Of course you were.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know "stuck in an elevator" is the oldest cliche in the book, but come on, I had to.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long for the update!

An hour later, the elevator moved again, and Dean and Castiel were freed. During that time, Dean had told Castiel all about his favorite show, _Crazy Ex-Girlfriend_. He’d told him about every single episode, in detail, and had even sang a few of the hilarious songs. Castiel had stayed mostly quiet, making a quiet “hmm” or letting out a soft chuckle every now and then. Dean could talk forever about that show and never get sick of it. Somehow, it seemed to be calming down Castiel.

When the elevator doors were opened on the first floor, Dean reached out a hand for Castiel. After hesitating for a moment, Castiel grabbed his hand and hauled himself to his feet. Dean walked beside him to the parking lot, making sure he didn’t wobble too much. He wasn’t sure if Castiel would appreciate it if Dean put a hand on him for good measure, so he just stayed close to him as much as possible.

“Stop staring at me,” Castiel said, digging out his keys.

“Are you okay?” Dean asked, following Castiel to his car. It wasn’t right next to Dean’s this time, but it wasn’t far either.

“I’m okay,” Castiel said, letting out a long breath. “I just want to go home, take a bath, and watch some mindless television.”

“You should check out that show I was talking about.” Dean smiled, but Castiel still had a permanent frown.

“I don’t think it’s necessary after all I’ve heard.”

“But it’s better to watch it than hear it from me. Plus, the songs sound much better sung by actual talented singers.”

Castiel opened his door and turned to look at Dean. “Dean, I’m exhausted right now. I also think you have a nice voice. So I’m going to go home now, if you don’t mind.”

“You think I have a nice voice?” Dean didn’t think he’d heard right. He was smiling now. Castiel had actually complimented him. Maybe he was just really tired.

“I do,” Castiel said, and then there was a hint of a smile.

“Alright, well, take care. I’ll see you Monday.”

“Just like always,” Castiel mumbled, getting in his car.

 

 

***

 

 

The Roadhouse was packed by the time Dean arrived. All his friends were at a table, already a few drinks in. Dean sat next to Bela, mostly because that was the only spot left.

“Hey! You’re alive!” Bela said.

“We heard about the elevator getting stuck,” Chuck said from across the table.

“Yeah, heard you got stuck with Castiel,” Pamela said from his side of the booth. “How’d you manage to not kill each other?”

“That guy creeps me out,” Kevin said.

“Me too,” Bela said. “I can’t believe I invited him. I’m glad he said no.”

Dean couldn’t help the grimace on his face. Suddenly he realized why he didn’t socialize with his coworkers so much. They were all a bunch of jackals.

“Okay, guys, stow it with the crap about Cas,” Dean said, turning his glare on all of them. “The guy had a rough time today, and he doesn’t deserve this.”

“Oh my God, did he have a total freak-out in the elevator?” Pamela asked, almost spitting out her drink. “How embarrassing.”

Dean hadn’t meant to let that slip out. He realized he’d said too much. “Why is everyone so obsessed with the guy anyway? I’m the only one that has to put up with him.”

“Yeah, and we’d talk to you more if you weren’t sitting right next to him,” Kevin said, laughing.

“I think the guy’s okay,” Chuck said. “Just a little weird.”

“He isn’t weird,” Dean said. “Can we please not talk about him anymore?”

Bela laughed. “Relax, Dean. We can talk about other things.” Her hand was on his shoulder, but Dean couldn’t wait for her to stop touching him. He’d made a mistake coming here.

Dean made up his mind. As soon as he had one drink, he would go home. There was no need to stick around with all these people.

So when his drink arrived, Dean drank silently. Everyone else was caught up in multiple conversations, but Dean stayed quiet. Bela kept a hand on Dean’s leg, and he just kept wishing she’d take it away. If Bela hadn’t been a part of their conversation earlier about Castiel, maybe Dean wouldn’t mind it so much. But now, Dean wanted nothing to do with her.

“Hey, Dean, you want to go back to my place after this?” Bela asked close to his ear.

Dean finished the last of his beer. “I think I’m going to pass. Sorry, Bela.”

The look of shock on her face was priceless. “Oh…okay.” And finally, her hand was gone.

“I’ll catch you guys later,” Dean said, standing up.

“Leaving so soon?” Pamela asked. “But we were having such a great time.”

“I forgot I have stuff to do,” Dean said.

“What stuff?” Chuck asked.

Dean waved a hand. “Just stuff. See you all Monday.”

Everyone else said their goodbyes, and Dean sighed as he left.

When Dean got home, he took a long shower, got in his pajamas, and put on _Crazy Ex-Girlfriend_. His mind kept drifting back to the elevator, though. Castiel had been so afraid before Dean started distracting him. For some reason, seeing Castiel so vulnerable had changed something in Dean. In that moment, Dean had only wanted to help Castiel in any way possible.

Dean had known Castiel for three years, but he still didn’t entirely know him. In all that time, he’d never felt the need to defend him against anyone. But now? Now, Castiel was a person, not just his coworker. He was someone Dean wanted to maybe, someday, befriend.

Would Castiel want that? Dean wasn’t sure. But he’d find out on Monday.

 

 

***

 

 

Monday morning couldn’t come fast enough. Dean had thought about Castiel all weekend. Wait, no, backtrack a little. That sounded wrong. Dean had thought about _befriending_ Castiel all weekend. It had been a long weekend.

After all that thinking, Dean realized that if he somehow managed to be friends with Castiel, maybe his days at work would be a little more pleasant. He just hoped Castiel agreed with him.

Dean got to his desk earlier than usual. Castiel hadn’t arrived yet. Dean put a cup of coffee and a bag with two donuts on his desk. Dean had picked it up just for him, as a little peace offering. It was a nerve-wracking, waiting for Castiel to arrive. Dean hadn’t done anything nice for the guy…ever, and he wasn’t sure how he would react.

Dean got to work and waited for Castiel. And waited. And waited. By 8:30, Dean was growing worried. Castiel was never late. He was usually always early. Dean kept taking calls, but his mind was elsewhere. It was difficult to concentrate on anything else besides Castiel. His mind immediately went to Friday afternoon, and the shaky way Castiel had gone home. Dean should have made sure he made it home safely.

The hours ticked by, and Castiel didn’t show. Dean would have found it normal, but Castiel rarely took days off. If he wasn’t here, it had to be serious.

Dean took his lunch later than usual, but he barely touched his food. He’d thrown away Castiel’s coffee and donuts earlier. He couldn’t stop thinking about him. Something had to be wrong. And Dean didn’t even have his number to contact him.

There was someone who _would_ know, though. Dean couldn’t believe he was even considering it. But he still found himself in Crowley’s office.

“Dean,” Crowley said, giving him a toothy grin. “What brings you here?”

“Hi, yeah, I was just wondering if you knew anything about Cas—Castiel.” Dean shifted on his feet. “I noticed he didn’t come in, and after what happened Friday, I was just wondering if maybe something happened to him.”

Crowley raised an eyebrow. “Why the sudden interest in your coworker? How many times, exactly, have you come begging me to move you to another desk?”

Dean cleared his throat. “Well, I’m not heartless. I wouldn’t want anything bad to happen to Castiel. He may not be my friend, but he’s my coworker. Has been for three years. If you don’t know anything, I understand. Thank you.”

Just as Dean was about to leave his office, Crowley spoke up. “He’s taking a bereavement leave.”

“Bereavement?” Dean asked, eyes wide. Someone had passed away in Castiel’s family. Oh God.

“That’s right,” Crowley said, eyes back on his computer. “That is all I can say.”

Dean nodded. “Thank you, Mr. Crowley.”

“Get back to work now, Mr. Winchester.”

“Absolutely.”

Dean went back to his desk, his mind on Castiel, again. Dean couldn’t remember a time when he wasn’t thinking about him anymore. Castiel had lost someone. Dean couldn’t imagine what he must be going through. He didn’t know if Castiel had any close friends. Dean knew nothing about his personal life. And maybe this was none of Dean’s business, but he couldn’t help but worry.

The day dragged on and on. When it was time to go, Dean spotted Charlie approaching his desk.

“Hey, you ready to go?” Charlie asked.

“Yeah, I guess I am.”

“Where’s your buddy?”

Dean looked at Castiel’s empty desk. “He didn’t come in today.”

“Why do you look so down?” Charlie asked, staring at him.

“I’m just worried about Cas.”

“Seriously? Since when do you care about him?”

Dean shrugged. “Since I decided I wanted to be his friend.”

Charlie raised her eyebrows. “After all these years you want to be friends with Castiel Novak? Whoa. Let me know how that goes.”

“What about you and Jo? Any progress yet?”

Charlie shushed him. “Not in here. I’ll tell you when we get outside.”

They took the stairs this time, just to be safe, and walked to the parking lot. Charlie was filling him in on all things Jo. Apparently, Charlie had made a lot of progress. They’d gone out for lunch today. Jo was even better than Charlie had expected.

“We’re going to lunch again tomorrow!” Charlie beamed.

“That’s awesome,” Dean said, trying to sound enthusiastic.

“Seriously, man, what’s got you so down?”

“It’s nothing, really.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure. I’ll see you tomorrow, alright?”

“See you tomorrow!”

Dean hoped to see Castiel tomorrow too.

 

 

***

 

 

The next day, Castiel wasn’t at work. He wasn’t at work the day after that either.

On Thursday, when Dean showed up to work, soaked from the rain, Castiel was at his desk.

Dean stopped on his tracks, a smile spreading on his cheeks. Castiel was back. It had been the longest week of Dean’s life, but Castiel was back.

“Cas, you’re here,” Dean said, going over to his desk.

“Very observant,” Castiel said, typing away on his keyboard.

“You were gone for so long.” Dean sat down, his eyes never leaving Castiel. He thought he looked different. His hair was longer and messier. His eyes were bluer than before, if that was possible. And he was wearing a new tie. It was green. Dean liked the blue one better.

“I was gone for three days.” Castiel stopped typing and turned to Dean. “Why do you care about my absence at all?”

Dean blinked. Why did he care so much about Castiel not being there? Was there any logical reason behind that? “I was worried about you.” Dean figured honesty was the best thing here.

“You were…worried about me?” Castiel tilted his head. “Why?”

“Because I was,” Dean said, a shiver running through him from the cold. His clothes were still soaked, and the air conditioning wasn’t helping.

“You are wet,” Castiel said.

“You’re observant too.” Dean scratched the back of his neck. “I was wondering if you wanted to have lunch with me today.”

“We have lunch at the same time every day, Dean.”

“I know. I meant, we should go out for lunch today. Somewhere. Outside the office.”

Castiel stared at him for a while, his mouth hanging open. “Why?”

“Do I need to have a reason?”

“Why would you want that? We aren’t friends.”

“Why can’t we be…friends?”

Castiel narrowed his eyes. “You, Dean Winchester, want to be _my_ friend?”

Dean nodded slowly. “Yeah.”

“I don’t. I don’t understand. Where is this coming from?”

“Cas, come on, just give me an answer,” Dean said. “Do you want to go out for lunch with me or not?”

Castiel swallowed. “Yes.”

Dean smiled, hesitantly. “Okay. Cool.”

Castiel shook his head a little before he went back to work.

Dean stared at the clock, waiting impatiently for lunchtime.

 


	4. Chapter 4

“You ready to go?” Dean asked, as soon as it was 1:15 on the dot.

Castiel sighed, digging out his keys. “Sure. I’ll drive.”

“No, that’s alright. I can drive.”

Castiel tilted his head at Dean, stared at him, and then got up and started walking away. Dean grabbed his messenger bag and followed after him, catching up to him just as they reached the stairs.

“What’s the rush, man?” Dean asked beside him.

“I’m driving,” Castiel said. “I don’t trust your ancient car.”

“Ancient?” Dean scoffed. “It’s a classic.”

“I’m driving,” Castiel insisted, in that stubborn way of his.

Dean sighed. “Fine. You can drive your stupid Prius.”

Castiel’s lips twitched, but just barely. When they reached the front doors of the building, the heavy rain was visible. Dean hadn’t brought an umbrella this morning, which was why he’d got completely soaked on his way inside. At his side, Castiel pulled out a big black umbrella and opened it up.

Dean cleared his throat, and Castiel turned to him.

“Would you like to share?” Castiel asked.

“If you don’t mind. I already got rained on this morning.”

Castiel nodded, waving Dean closer to him. Dean had to get very close to Castiel, so much that their arms and shoulders touched. It was odd being in Castiel’s personal space all of a sudden. But Castiel didn’t make it awkward, and the walk to his car was short.

Inside the car, Dean felt confined. He was used to the spacious seating in his Impala. And this was the complete opposite. The new car smell also put him off. One thing was for sure, though, it was very clean. Neat-freak-clean.

Castiel turned on the radio, and a soft, quiet song started playing. If Dean had been driving, he would have worried the song would put him to sleep. But this wasn’t Dean’s car, so he had no right to protest over the music. Besides, he was trying to make nice with Castiel.

“Where are we going for lunch?” Castiel asked, squinting his eyes in Dean’s direction.

“I know a good diner nearby. Do you like burgers?”

“Not usually.”

“They have other food, too. What do you like?”

“Salads,” Castiel answered easily.

Dean knew that. But he was hoping there was another answer. “They have salads.”

Castiel nodded, apparently satisfied. “Perfect. Let’s go there.”

Dean guided Castiel to Sue’s Diner a few blocks from their work building. The walk inside was much shorter this time, so they left the umbrella inside the car and only got a few sprinkles on them.

They sat at a booth in the corner, and Dean had bright blue eyes on him again.

“Why do you look so uncomfortable?” Dean asked.

“This place smells greasy, it’s full of people, and I’m still not entirely sure why I’m here with you.”

Dean opened his mouth to reply, but a waitress showed up with menus for them, and took their drink orders. Dean thanked her—Paula, her nametag read—and glanced at Castiel once they were alone again. “The food really _is_ good here, Cas. That’s why it’s always busy. Is there anything I can do to make you feel better about being here with me?”

Castiel swallowed, looking more nervous than Dean had ever seen him. The bravado he put up at work was completely gone. Castiel was just as vulnerable as he’d been in the elevator. “I’d like to know why you wanted to do this. I don’t buy the reason you gave me.”

“You don’t believe that I want to be your friend?” Dean asked.

Castiel shook his head. “We’ve sat next to each other for three long years. We’ve never had a civilized conversation. And now, suddenly, we get stuck in an elevator, and you want to have lunch?”

Dean looked at Castiel. “The other day I realized that I don’t really know you, man. When we were in the elevator, I saw another side of you. I just figured we could try to start over. Don’t you think it’d be better if we stop antagonizing each other at work all the time?”

Castiel looked down at his hands. Before he could speak, Paula returned with their drinks, and then took their orders and left. Castiel sipped his lemonade. “I don’t know how to be myself around you.”

“Why?”

“Because I keep thinking you’ll only use it to tease me later.”

Dean ran a hand through his hair. “Cas, I don’t know if you remember, but the first day I sat next to you, I tried to be friendly. You’re the one who called me names. I just went along with it.”

“What did you expect from me? Everyone at work hates me. I was on the defensive. I knew you were put next to me as punishment.”

Dean looked into Castiel’s eyes for a long while. “ _I_ don’t hate you.”

“Don’t you?”

“No. I don’t. And I really hope you don’t hate me either, because otherwise, this will be really awkward.”

“Maybe I don’t.” And then he smiled. “I don’t hate you, Dean.”

Dean let out a sigh of relief. “Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m glad we got that out of the way.”

“Me too. I’d like to start over as well.”

“Awesome.”

In that moment, Paula arrived with their food. Dean got his usual cheeseburger and fries, and Castiel got a Caesar salad.

Dean eyed Castiel’s salad as he poured an unhealthy amount of ketchup on his fries. “I was sort of hoping you’d try their burgers. Do you ever eat anything other than salads?”

“Sometimes,” Castiel said, pouring a little bit of salad dressing on his salad. “I don’t allow myself to indulge often.”

“I’m glad you weren’t here to see the donuts I brought you then.”

Castiel raised his eyebrows. “When did you bring me donuts?”

“On Monday.” Dean rubbed the back of his neck. “I also got you coffee. But I had to throw it all away when you didn’t show.”

“That was…nice of you.”

“But you wouldn’t have eaten the donuts, would you?”

“I might have.” Castiel smiled a little. “But I prefer waffles for breakfast.”

“Okay. Duly noted.”

“I wasn’t here on Monday because—” Castiel cut himself off.

“You don’t have to tell me.”

Castiel relaxed his shoulders. “It’s a personal matter.”

“I understand.” And he did. Dean wasn’t here to pry on Castiel’s personal business.

“Thank you.”

They ate in comfortable silence. Occasionally, Dean would ask something about Castiel. He learned that Castiel had two brothers, the ones with the angel names he’d mentioned before, but he was only close to one of them. Dean told him about his brother, Sam. Castiel listened attentively as Dean shared about the last time Dean had ever tried to force Sam to trim his hair. It had been a total disaster.

“Why does it bother you so much that your brother has long hair?” Castiel asked.

“It doesn’t bother me. Just looks weird. I won’t fight him on it anymore though.”

“Do you think it makes him less of a man?”

Dean squared his shoulders. “What? No, I never said that.”

“Over the years, I’ve noticed how manly you want to appear.”

Dean wasn’t sure where Castiel was going with this, but he didn’t interrupt him to ask.

“You’ve slept with quite a few women in the office,” Castiel said.

“How the hell do you know that?” Dean had to interject.

Castiel gave him a smile. “Dean, come on.”

“What? Tell me how you know that.”

“It’s obvious,” Castiel said. “You don’t hide your flings very well.”

Dean scoffed. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You flirt with all the other women you haven’t slept with,” Castiel continued. “You drive a loud muscle car. Sometimes you deepen your voice on the phone, which sounds painful, by the way.”

“Alright, you don’t need to keep pointing things out about me,” Dean said, crossing his arms. “Since when do you pay this much attention to what I do?”

“I always pay attention.”

“So, what, I act manly sometimes. It’s just who I am.”

Castiel raised an eyebrow. “Is it? I figured you were putting up an image.”

“Not really.” Dean wasn’t so sure anymore. “Maybe. Why does it matter?”

“I’m just trying to get to know you better,” Castiel admitted, a bit sheepishly.

Dean shook his head. “I haven’t slept with that many women in the office. Only, like, three. Wait, no, four. And one man. But that’s it.”

Castiel coughed on the drink he’d just sipped. When he calmed down, he gaped at Dean. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t expecting to hear that.”

Dean shrugged. “What, are you surprised I’m bi? Well, I am. It’s not a secret. I’m not in the closet. Haven’t been for years.”

“I just…never caught on to that in all these years. I can’t believe I missed that.”

“Does that change your perception of me?” Dean would be disappointed if Castiel was too put off by Dean being bisexual. That would be the end of their new friendship.

“No,” Castiel said in earnest. “No, it doesn’t. Thank you for sharing that with me, Dean.”

Dean felt himself relax. “I haven’t had much luck with the dating thing though. Not with men or with women.”

Castiel tilted his head, a smile on his lips. “No luck with Bela, then?”

Dean laughed. “Oh, no. That didn’t happen at all.”

“Really? I thought that’s where you were headed on Friday.”

Dean wasn’t sure if he wanted to tell Castiel why he didn’t hook up with Bela. Honestly, it wasn’t just Bela that had pissed him off that night. But she was definitely not excluded from that group. “Nah, nothing happened with Bela. I did show up at the bar, but I left after one drink.”

“Why?”

Dean had known that question was coming. “I realized I don’t really like those guys. They’re not really my friends.”

“So I was right.” Castiel’s voice got higher with excitement.

Dean rolled his eyes. “Yeah, whatever.”

Castiel laughter, and Dean smiled. The sound of Castiel’s laughter was something Dean would have to get used to. He found out he really liked it. “I love being right.”

“Shut up.”

“I’m going to miss fighting with you.”

Dean raised his hands. “Oh, don’t stop on my account.”

“Okay, Dumbo.”

Dean groaned. “I hate it when you call me that.”

“Do you really?”

Dean locked eyes with Castiel, and then laughed. “Not really. But why do you like calling me dumb?”

“I’m not calling you dumb,” Castiel said. “I’m calling you Dumbo. Like the elephant.”

Dean gaped at him. “Do I look like an elephant to you?”

Castiel threw his head back in laughter. “A little bit.”

“Hey, I may be pudgy, but I like it.”

“I never said I didn’t.”

Dean furrowed his brow, trying to make sense of what Castiel had implied. Then he remembered they were still on their lunch break and he checked the time on his phone. “Oh, shit, we’ve been here for over an hour.”

Castiel widened his eyes. “We haven’t even asked for the check.”

“I’ll take care of it.” Dean pulled out his wallet as he called over the waitress.

“What? No. I’m paying for my half.”

Dean ignored him as he asked Paula to bring him the check.

“Dean, I’m not letting you pay for my lunch.”

“Cas,” Dean said, seriously. “I don’t know about you, but I want to keep doing this. If we’re going to make a habit out of these lunches, then we need to have some sort of arrangement. I pay this time, and you can pay next time. Does that work for you?”

Without really thinking about it, Castiel nodded. “Yes, that works for me.”

“Awesome. You can pick the place next time.”

“I’ll make you eat healthy.”

“Eventually, I’ll make you eat a burger.”

Castiel smiled. “We’ll see about that.”

After Dean paid for lunch, Castiel drove them back to the office. The rain had finally stopped, so they didn’t have to share an umbrella on the way back to the building. Once they made it to the fourth floor up the stairs, Dean shared a tired glance with Castiel.

“You think we’ll ever use the elevator again?” Dean asked.

Castiel scrunched up his nose. “I won’t.”

“But it’s four floors, dude. _Four_.”

“It’s still better than getting stuck in an elevator.”

As they walked on the floor to their desks, Dean noticed that a lot of eyes were on them. It must be odd to everyone seeing them talking to each other in a friendly way. Dean tried to ignore all the attention they were getting, but _he_ was still getting used to this new friendship.

When they got back to their seats, Castiel turned to Dean. “We have an audience.”

“I know.” Dean could see a few heads peeking up from their cubicles to look at them.

“What should we do?”

“Just ignore them, I guess?”

Castiel nodded. “Do you think we’ll get in trouble for taking a long lunch?”

Dean hadn’t thought about that. “I’ll deal with Crowley. Don’t worry about it.”

“I don’t need you defending me, Dean.”

“That’s what friends do.”

“So, after one lunch, we’re automatically friends?”

Dean blinked, staring at Castiel. And then he saw him smiling. “How many lunches will it take for you to sign the contract stating that we’re friends?”

“Well, if there’s a contract, it’ll have to be at least ten lunches.”

Dean smiled right back. He could get used to this.


	5. Chapter 5

Later in the afternoon, Dean spotted Charlie approaching him. He looked at the clock and realized it was time to go home. The day had gone flying. Between their calls, Dean had continued talking to Castiel, asking him questions he was curious about. They mostly talked about Sebastian, Castiel’s cat. Dean found out that Sebastian was a rescue, and that it was difficult for him to get adopted because he was black.

“A lot of people don’t like black cats,” Castiel had explained with a frown. “I don’t know if people are superstitious or racist, but it’s stupid either way.”

Dean had agreed.

“Hey, Dean, you ready to go?” Charlie asked.

“Yeah, give me one second.” Dean grabbed a set of post-it notes and wrote down his phone number. Then he handed the note to Castiel. “Cas, here’s my number. Call or text me anytime you want.”

Castiel looked at the note for a while, and then he nodded. “Okay. Thank you, Dean.”

“Alright, Charlie, we better get going.” Dean grabbed his messenger bag, pushed in his chair, and followed Charlie to the stairs.

“What was that about?” Charlie asked.

“What?”

“You gave Castiel your number,” Charlie said. “Is something going on with you two?”

Dean smiled. “Oh. That. Yeah, we’re friends.”

“ _Friends?_ How? Okay, you gotta start from the beginning.”

As they walked down the stairs, Dean told Charlie all about his lunch with Castiel, and how they had just sort of agreed to continue having them.

“I took a few tips from you, you know,” Dean said. “You told me you just went up to Jo and asked her to lunch, so that’s what I did with Cas.”

Charlie laughed. “Yeah, Dean, but I actually want to _date_ Charlie. Are you trying to date Castiel?”

“Nah, Cas is just my buddy. Besides, he’s probably straight.”

“Does he know you’re not?”

Dean looked at his feet. “Yeah, he knows.”

“And he didn’t say anything about his own sexuality?”

“Charlie, come on. Just because we’re gay doesn’t mean everyone else is.”

“But do you think he’s cute?”

“That’s irrelevant.”

Charlie gasped. “Oh my god, you think he’s cute.”

At the bottom of the stairs, Dean stopped walking. Crossing his arms, he turned to Charlie. He wasn’t sure how to answer that. Just as he opened his mouth to speak, he heard a soft voice behind him.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Dean,” Castiel said.

Dean froze, eyes widening. He cleared his throat. “Yeah. Bye, Cas.”

When Castiel was a safe distance out of the building, Dean turned to Charlie. “Cas was behind us the whole time. Do you think he heard our conversation?”

Charlie laughed. “Probably. We weren’t being quiet.”

“Shit.”

“At least he didn’t seem upset.”

Dean pointed a finger at Charlie. “No more talking about Cas at work. I don’t need him to think I’m some sort of creep. I just want to be his friend.”

“Alright, I get it.” Charlie hooked an arm around Dean’s arm. “So, Jo and I are going to the movies this Friday.”

“Are you serious? Have you kissed yet?”

Charlie blushed. It was so rare to see her blush that Dean found it endearing. “Yeah. Just once. It was really fast. But I’m glad we got that awkward first kiss out of the way.”

“When do I get to meet her?”

“Soon, I promise.”

Dean nodded, getting to his car. Castiel’s car was gone, and Dean was relieved by that. He wasn’t sure how he would face Castiel again after that conversation he overheard.

“Is Sam still coming in the summer?” Charlie asked.

“Yeah, that’s the plan. He’s bringing Jess.”

“Oh, awesome. I really like her.”

“Me too.”

Charlie smiled up at Dean. “Good luck with Castiel. It’s only been one day but you’re far less grumpy than before.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Yeah, okay.”

 

 

***

 

 

After a long shower, Dean was preparing dinner while listening to the Ramones. He heard his phone buzz, and Dean left his pasta unattended as he picked it up from the table.

The message was from an unknown number.

_Hello, Dean. I had a lovely time with you at lunch today._

Dean grinned as he typed out a response.

**I did too. I’m looking forward to a lot more lunches with you.**

Just as he sent the message, Dean wondered if it sounded odd. Was it odd to say something like that to your friends? Dean didn’t usually worry what he said to his friends. But things were different with Castiel. He was a new friend, but not a new person. Dean had to get used to this change. He saved Castiel’s name in his phone as ‘Cas,’ and went back to his pasta.

Dean received another message.

_Do you always talk about me with Charlie?_

Dean gaped at his phone. Castiel had definitely heard his conversation with Charlie. How much had he heard? Oh God. Dean was not prepared for this.

**Sometimes. She’s my best friend. She likes to know things.**

Dean finished his pasta and served himself a plate. He heard his phone buzz again as he took the plate to his coffee table.

_And I’m a new thing in your life?_

Dean smiled.

**You’re an exciting new thing.**

Dean nearly spat out his food when he got his next text.

_And you find me cute._

**Hey, I never said that. Those were Charlie’s words.**

_I’m messing with you, Dean._

**I knew that.**

_I’m still allowed to mess with you, right?_

**Yeah, only if I can mess with you, too.**

Dean frowned at the screen. For some reason, all of his messages sounded like they had a double meaning. Maybe it was Castiel mentioning what he’d overheard, but Dean’s heart was racing with just this simple text conversation.

Castiel didn’t answer for another half hour, so Dean finished his dinner. When he was getting ready for bed, he got another text.

It was a picture of Castiel’s cat sleeping on Castiel’s bed. Or what Dean assumed was Castiel’s bed. There was a message underneath.

_I hope you understand that being my friend means often receiving pictures of my cat._

Dean grinned as got in bed, under the covers.

**Send me all the pictures you want Cas. Your cat’s awesome.**

_Can I tell you something?_

**Anything you want.**

_You’re better than I expected._

**What did you expect?**

_I don’t know. Not this._

**You’re pretty cool too Cas.**

_I’m going to bed. Goodnight, Dean._

**Goodnight Cas.**

 

 

*******

 

 

Dean went to work on Friday with a bright smile on his face. It was rare that Dean woke up in such a good mood, but he decided to just go with it.

When he got to his desk and saw Castiel, Dean’s day got better.

Castiel was wearing his regular blue tie today, and he was crouched over his notebook.

“Good morning, Cas,” Dean said, sitting down. “I brought you coffee.”

Dean handed one of his cups to Castiel.

Castiel smiled down at the cup. “Thank you, Dean. You didn’t have to do that.”

“There’s a coffee shop near my house,” Dean said.

“There’s one by mine as well. Cool Beans, I believe is the name.”

“No way. Dude, that’s my coffee shop. Do you live in my neighborhood?”

Castiel tilted his head. “I live on Dunmore, on the apartment complexes at the corner of the street.”

“I live on Sherry, the street right behind. I live in a house.”

“We live within walking distance. That’s interesting.”

Dean laughed. “We could probably carpool if we wanted to help the environment.”

“Your ancient car is probably harming the environment, but I own a Prius.”

Dean scoffed. “Whatever, dude. You can’t keep talking bad about my baby until you get inside her.”

Castiel made a face. “No, thanks.”

“Alright, but it’s your loss.”

“Is it? No, I don’t think it is.”

“Yes it—”

“Mr. Winchester. Mr. Novak,” Crowley said, standing right behind them. His glare was on both of them.

“Yes, sir?” Dean said.

“Follow me into my office,” Crowley said, walking away.

Dean looked at Castiel, but Castiel just shrugged before he followed Crowley. Dean followed Castiel.

Once they were both inside Crowley’s office, Crowley shut his door. Dean hated being locked in a room with his boss. He was kind of grateful that Castiel was there with them.

“Have a seat,” Crowley ordered.

Dean and Castiel took a seat and stayed quiet as Crowley took his place behind his desk.

“I’ve received a few complaints about the two of you,” Crowley said, looking from Dean to Castiel. “A lot of chatter coming from your area.”

“I’m sorry, Mr. Crowley,” Castiel said. “We will keep it down.”

“Yes, well, it also appears the two of you took a very long lunch yesterday.”

“That was my bad,” Dean said. “I asked Castiel out to lunch, and we got caught up talking. I forgot to check the time. It won’t happen again.”

Crowley raised his eyebrows. “You’re getting very friendly, aren’t you?”

“I…guess?” Dean said.

“Shall I remind you that all office romances must be disclosed to HR?”

“What?” Dean asked, at the same time Castiel said, “I understand.”

“I don’t know what is going on between the two of you,” Crowley said, looking bored. “Nor do I care. Just do your work, stay quiet, and take a one-hour lunch, no more than that.”

Dean nodded. “Yes, sir.”

“We will,” Castiel said.

Crowley sighed. “Get back to work.”

They walked in silence back to their desks, but as soon as they sat down, Dean turned to Castiel.

“Can you believe that guy?” Dean asked.

Castiel gave Dean a look. “Dean, we just got in trouble for talking. Don’t give Crowley another reason to call us back in there.”

“Fine. But who the hell complained about us talking? Our job is literally to talk. How are we being disruptive to anyone?”

Castiel didn’t answer any of Dean’s questions. Instead, he put on his headset and answered a phone call. A few seconds later, Dean did the same.

By lunchtime, Dean was relieved to finally get a chance to talk to Castiel. They hadn’t said another word to each other. They mostly made faces at each other. Every time Dean would eat a piece of chocolate, Castiel would make a face to show his disapproval. Dean would make a face to show that he didn’t care, and he kept eating his chocolates. Castiel would roll his eyes and get back to work. That was how they communicated all day, and Dean was so tired of it.

Dean walked with Castiel to the stairs, ignoring all the glances from the people on the floor. He thought he saw Bela somewhere, but he couldn’t care less about her reaction to Dean’s new friend.

“Where are we going to eat today?” Dean asked.

“It’s a surprise,” Castiel said.

“Oh, I love surprises.”

“I know you do.”

“How do you know so much about me?”

“I told you, Dean. I pay attention.”

“I can’t believe Crowley won’t let us talk to each other. Nobody ever complained back when we would just insult each other. Now that we want to be friends, everyone hates us.”

Castiel looked at Dean, almost like he was waiting for him to catch up.

“Wait, do you think the people who complained did it because they hate us?” Dean asked. “They don’t want us to be friends?”

“People like you, Dean,” Castiel said. “They don’t like me, though. So, now that they know we’re friends they might not like you as much.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

“It is. But small offices are like that.”

Dean stayed quiet as Castiel drove. He kept thinking about what Castiel had said. He wondered if everyone in the office had suddenly turned on Dean for befriending Castiel. How could people be so petty? Were they hoping that Dean stopped talking to Castiel? That wasn’t going to happen.

“We’re here,” Castiel said.

“Where are we?”

“Come on, let’s go.”

Dean got out of the car and stared up at the small place. The place had a big red sign that read: Soup and Salad. That alone was enough to make Dean want to get back in the car.

Castiel was beside him. “It’s really good. I promise.”

Dean followed Castiel inside. The place was quiet, there were hardly any customers. It looked modern. There were mostly booths, and they were all a different color. Castiel picked a purple table for them. Dean sat across from him, looking around the room until he spotted a waiter approaching them.

They were handed one-page menus, and given two glasses of water, unprompted.

Dean read his menu and realized most of the items were soups and salads. “Why?” was all he said.

“This is my favorite restaurant.”

“Do people actually call this a restaurant? Soups and salads are add-on items, dude. Not actual meals.”

“Try the chicken tortilla soup,” Castiel said. “You’ll like it.”

Dean groaned. “You really weren’t kidding when you said you would make me eat healthy.”

“Flip over the menu.”

Dean did. And then he broke into a smile. The list of desserts covered the entire page. “They have pie. A lot of pie. Oh my God.”

“Surprise.”

Dean beamed at Castiel. He could hug him right now. Although, maybe that would be weird. “Dude, how’d you know I love pie?”

“I didn’t know you loved pie,” Castiel said. “I know you love sweets, though. You eat them all the time. It’s really bad for you, by the way.”

“I’m going to have two slices. Screw the soup.”

Castiel shook his head. “Do I need to mother you? You’re going to have real food before dessert, Dean.”

“Real food? This is rabbit food.”

“Try it before you judge it.”

Dean raised an eyebrow. “Get in my Impala before you judge her.”

“That is not the same thing at all.”

“Promise me one day you’ll get in my car,” Dean said, holding Castiel’s gaze.

Castiel hesitated. “One day.”

“Awesome. I’ll hold you to it.”

When they ordered, Dean went with the chicken soup Castiel recommended. And he ordered a slice of apple pie, and peach cobbler. When the waiter asked if Dean would rather wait until he finished his soup for them to bring them his dessert, Dean said he would rather have all of it sent out at once. The waiter looked a bit confused as he left.

“You’re unbelievable,” Castiel said.

“Get used to it.”

Castiel sipped his water. “What are your plans for this weekend?”

Dean smiled. “I forgot it’s Friday. I’d like to visit the farmer’s market. I’m going to a karaoke bar Saturday night with Charlie. She loves karaoke. What about you? You got anything going on?”

“I’m just going to dinner with my brothers. This is Michael’s last week in town, so Gabriel and I are taking him out to say goodbye.”

“You and Gabriel both live in Kansas?”

“Yes. That’s why we’re close. We spend too much time with each other.”

“You’re lucky. Sam lives in California. I only ever see him in the summers, and a few holidays. I fly out to see him sometimes, but now that he lives with his serious girlfriend, I don’t want to intrude.”

“Is Sam coming to Lawrence this summer?”

“Yeah, he’ll be here in May. Just two months away.”

“Are you already counting down the days?”

“Are you kidding? The moment he leaves I start counting down the days.”

Castiel laughed. “You must really love your brother.”

“Yeah, and I’m really proud of him. He’s in law school. Stanford.”

“That’s impressive.”

Dean shrugged. “That’s Sammy.”

Their food arrived, and Dean would be lying if he said his soup didn’t make him salivate. It smelled pretty good, but Dean was still skeptical when he took his first spoonful. Castiel looked at Dean, waiting to hear the verdict.

“I hate you,” Dean said.

“No, you don’t.”

“This is fucking delicious.”

“I told you.”

“Shut up.”

Dean wolfed down the rest of his soup, not bothering to stop and make conversation. He had one goal, and that was to finish his delicious soup so he could eat his delicious dessert. Castiel looked at him and smiled every time.

“I love this place,” Dean admitted.

“I’m glad to hear that.”

“I don’t want to go back to work. I want to go home and take a nap.”

Castiel laughed. “That does sound good, doesn’t it?”

“Hell yeah.” Dean took a bite of his apple pie, and he moaned. “Dude, this is awesome. You want to try it?” Dean pushed the plate to Castiel.

Castiel sighed, grabbed Dean’s fork, and took a bite of the pie. His eyes widened as he chewed. “This _is_ good.”

“Eat some more.”

“I don’t really eat sweet foods.”

“Come on, just a little more.”

Castiel looked at Dean for a while, and then he took another bite of the pie. And a third one. Dean smiled as he watched Castiel’s cheeks fill up with the food. He had an endearing way of eating. Dean had never noticed before.

“Oh shit. Cas, lunchtime’s almost over.”

Castiel pushed Dean’s plate back to him. “You haven’t finished your dessert.”

“I’ll take it to go.”

This time, Castiel paid for their meals. Dean took his food to go, and they set out back to the office. They were laughing as they walked back to their desks, and Dean didn’t miss the looks they were given. Dean was annoyed to have so many nosy people in their business.

Dean was even more annoyed when he got to his desk and remembered he wasn’t allowed to talk to Castiel at all. What kind of rule was that? He groaned as he sat on his chair. Dean grabbed his headset and was about to start accepting phone calls when he felt a tap on his shoulder.

Dean turned to find Castiel pushing a folded piece of paper in his hands. Dean opened it to find a cartoon character waving at him. The caption underneath read: _Would it be too childish for us to pass notes back and forth like in grade school?_

Dean laughed. He wrote down: **I like the way you think. Hey, thanks again for lunch. It was great.**

Castiel took the note and handed it back a few minutes later. _Eating out every day will get expensive. I’d be okay eating in the breakroom too_.

**Oh, so you’ll finally sit with me in the breakroom? That’s progress.**

_Yes, Dean. I’m willing to sit with you in the breakroom. I’ve matured. Thank you for noticing._

Dean threw his head back in laughter. Castiel shook his head.

**You’re awesome.**

_It took you a while to notice._

 

 

_***_

 

 

That night, right after dinner, Dean curled up on his couch to watch _Jurassic Park._ He’d had a major crush on Jeff Goldblum when he first saw this movie, so it was still one of his favorites. An hour into the movie, he got a text.

Dean checked his phone and smiled when he saw it was from Sam.

_Dean! How are you? I’m doing good. I’m a little tipsy! Can you tell? I miss you, bro. I MISS YOUUUUU!_

**I miss you too Sammy. Are you having fun?**

_I am having a BLAST. I can’t wait to visit you soon. 2 moths._

_Hah I wrote moths_

_I meant moths_

_Month_

_S_

**Alright, no more texting for you. I’ll call you tomorrow.**

_Did I tell you I miss you? Cause I do._

**You did. Is Jess with you?**

_Jess is righthere. She misses you 2. And says hiiiiii_

**Hi Jess. Get home safely, alright?**

_For sure, my bro. For sureeee._

Dean snorted at his phone before he put it back on the coffee table. It buzzed again, and Dean picked it up to see what else Sam was drunkenly texting him. He was surprised to see the text was from Castiel. Not the person he was expecting to hear from, but he wasn’t disappointed.

_Here’s another picture of Sebastian_. The picture of Sebastian also showed a little bit of Castiel’s hair in the shot. It looked like he’d taken it while they were both lying in bed.

**Thanks. You should send me a picture of you with Sebastian. So I can add it to your contact information.**

A few minutes later, Dean got the picture of Castiel holding Sebastian up to his cheek. They looked adorable side by side. Dean saved the picture on Castiel’s contact. And then he read what Castiel wrote with the picture.

_Your turn._

Dean wasn’t prepared to take a picture. The lighting was bad too. But he went to stand next to the TV. He paused the movie on a shot of Jeff Goldblum and he snapped a quick picture. That was the picture he sent Castiel.

**Meet the man of my dreams.**

_Jeff Goldblum? No kidding. Good choice._

**He’s the reason I know every line of this movie.**

_Do you not find Chris Pratt attractive?_

**Oh please. Jurassic World has nothing on Jurassic Park.**

_I don’t remember the Jurassic Park movies. I do remember Jurassic World, however, because I just recently saw it._

**Well Chris Pratt can suck it.**

_So you DO like him._

**NO!**

_Okay, you can live in denial._

**Hey Cas, would it be weird for us to hang out outside of work?**

_What do you have in mind?_

**I just found out that Charlie’s bringing Jo to the karaoke bar tomorrow night. I don’t wanna third wheel them. So I thought I’d ask you.**

_I’m having dinner with my brothers tomorrow afternoon, but I can let you know when it’s over. I think I should be able to make it._

**Are you sure? I don’t want to get in the way of your dinner or anything.**

_Yes, Dean, I’m sure. I will see you tomorrow._

**Okay, cool. I’ll see you then.**

_Goodnight, Dean._

**Goodnight Cas.**


	6. Chapter 6

Dean had changed outfits five times already. He didn’t know why his appearance mattered so much tonight. He was only meeting up with Charlie, Jo, and Castiel. It wasn’t like he had to impress any one of them. But he was still not satisfied with his attire. He’d gone from formal, to casual, to business casual, to formal, and now he was down to ripped jeans and a red flannel over a white t-shirt. It wasn’t his best look, but he was supposed to head out any time now.

Dean’s phone buzzed with a text. He knew who it was before picking it up.

_I’m free from my brothers. Where is the bar?_

**It’s about fifteen minutes away. I can pick you up. I was just about to head out.**

_How about I pick you up instead? I’m close to your street. I can be there in five minutes._

**You can’t keep avoiding my car forever.**

_I can try._

Dean sighed. He typed up his address and sent it to Castiel. He debated whether he had enough time to pick another shirt, but then he decided to settle with what he had on. He wasn’t going to the bar to pick up anyone tonight. He was just there to hang out with his friends. That was it. Nothing else. Why should it matter what he was wearing?

A honk sounded right outside. Dean looked out the window and saw Castiel’s car in his driveway. He grabbed his wallet and walked outside. After locking his door, Dean got in the passenger seat of Castiel’s Prius. When he turned to look at Castiel, Dean immediately regretted his own outfit.

Castiel looked sharp. He wore dark jeans, a blue Henley, a gray blazer, and aviators. The only thing Dean recognized about him was his messy hair. Other than that, Castiel looked like an actual model who had just finished an important photoshoot.

“You look…” Dean trailed off. _Beautiful. Amazing. Handsome_.

“I didn’t mean to look so dressed up. I had to look nice for my dinner, and I didn’t have time to change.”

“I…”

Castiel chuckled, backing out of the driveway. “Are you okay? If you want to insult my look, you can. I don’t mind.”

“No,” Dean said quickly. “You don’t look bad at all. I look like trash compared to you.”

At a stoplight, Castiel removed his sunglasses and eyed Dean up and down, raising an eyebrow. “You look really nice.” Then he narrowed his eyes at Dean. “Were you fishing for compliments?”

Dean ran a hand through his hair. “No. I was just—never mind.”

Castiel turned up the soft acoustic music up on the radio. They drove like that for a few minutes. And then Dean broke the silence.

“Alright, what’s the deal with your music?”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s so quiet. And soft. And boring. Don’t you listen to anything else?”

Castiel laughed. “You’re very passionate about this topic, aren’t you?”

“Well, yeah. I love classic rock. Your music makes me want to sleep. I wasn’t going to mention it, but since I keep having to be in your car, I figured I should say something.”

“Classic rock, huh?”

“I love Zeppelin the most,” Dean said. “The Ramones, AC/DC, Pink Floyd, the Rolling Stones—all my favorites.”

Castiel pulled out his cell phone. “Dean, can you hand me the aux cord in the glove compartment?”

Dean handed it over. Castiel plugged in his phone. And then, the sweet chords of _Ramble On_ started playing. Dean grinned so much his cheeks hurt. He looked at Castiel in surprise. “You didn’t have to put this on for me.”

Castiel gave Dean his cell phone. “Look through my music. Ninety percent of it is classic rock. The other ten percent is folk and indie music.”

_“Dude.”_ Dean scrolled through Castiel’s music. True to his words, the majority of his music was classic rock. “I didn’t know you had good taste in music.”

“You underestimate me.”

“Why do you always listen to that boring crap?”

“Because this is my weekend music,” Castiel said. “I save it for days I can actually enjoy it. I couldn’t listen to Zeppelin on a weekday in the middle of work. I’d get pumped for nothing.”

Dean clicked on _Can’t You Hear Me Knocking_ by the Rolling Stones. The loud music filled his ears. It was louder in Castiel’s car than it would have been in Dean’s Impala. Castiel’s speakers were better, and the space was smaller. Dean sat back and listened to the song, smiling.

And then the music quieted down. “You never told me where the bar is.”

“Turn right up ahead. We’re almost there. Dude, how were we not friends before?”

“I don’t know. But I’m glad we’re friends now.”

They made it to the bar only five minutes late. Dean was sure Charlie didn’t mind because she was with Jo, and she probably wanted some alone time with her. Yesterday, Dean had asked if she preferred to go alone with Jo, but Charlie had insisted for Dean to join them. So here he was, with Castiel.

Once inside, they spotted Charlie and Jo at a table. Dean had never met Jo before, but he felt like he knew her.

“Hey, guys,” Charlie said. “I just ordered four beers. Hope that’s cool.”

Dean and Castiel sat across from them. “That’s fine with me,” Dean said. “Charlie, you know Cas. Cas, this is Charlie.”

“I’ve heard so much about you,” Charlie said, smiling at Castiel. “Dean won’t shut up about you.”

Castiel looked at Dean, a hint of a smile. “All bad things, I’m sure.”

“Not anymore!” Charlie said. “Guys, this is Jo. She works in my department. Jo, this is my bestie, Dean, and Castiel, his new friend from the office.”

Jo smiled sweetly at both of them. “Charlie told me all about you two. She said you used to hate each other, but now you’re best friends.”

“Not best friends, Jo,” Charlie said. “ _I’m_ Dean’s best friend. That title’s been taken. Sorry, dude,” she added to Castiel.

Castiel chuckled. “Don’t worry. I wasn’t planning on stealing your position.”

They got their beers just as a very drunk man started singing _Genie in a Bottle_. Dean turned to watch the spectacle on the small stage.

Castiel nudged Dean with his shoulder. “Are you going to sing tonight?”

Dean snorted. “I don’t sing, Cas.”

“Never?”

“Never.”

Castiel leaned closer. “Not even if I get your drunk?”

Dean smiled, suddenly aware of how close they were to each other. He could see the wrinkles on Castiel’s eyes. He could smell his scent—a mixture of peppermint and lavender. Why did he smell so good on top of looking so good?

“You can try. But I make no promises.”

Castiel took a sip of his beer. “I tend to get what I want.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yes.”

Dean grinned.

Across from them, Charlie cleared her throat. “Are you two done whispering to each other? You’re not the only people at the table.”

“Sorry,” Dean mumbled, sipping his beer.

“Do you want some shots?” Castiel asked everyone. “They’re on me.”

“None for me,” Charlie said. “I’m the designated driver. Just one beer and I’m good.”

“I’ll take a shot,” Jo said.

“And I—”

Castiel didn’t let Dean finish his sentence before he was gone. When he came back, he had four shots. He handed one to Jo, two to Dean, and one for himself. “Drink up.”

Dean picked up his drink and sniffed it. “Tequila? Seriously?”

“Drink,” Castiel ordered.

Dean raised an eyebrow. Since when did Castiel order Dean around? Since when did Dean like it? He downed his shot. And then he went for the second. “Still not drunk enough to sing.”

“We’ll get there.” Castiel touched Dean’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze.

“Are you trying to get Dean to sing?” Charlie asked. “I don’t think that’s happening. He’s never wanted to sing. He just comes to see other people embarrass themselves.”

“That’s true,” Dean said with a shrug.

“What song would you sing?” Jo asked Dean.

“I don’t know,” Dean said, trying to think of something he could actually sing on key. Dean hadn’t even realized that Castiel had left, but when he came back, he had two more shots. Both for Dean. “Hey, no, if I’m getting drunk, so are you.”

“I have to drive. You don’t.”

“Charlie will drive all of us,” Dean said. “Right, Charlie?”

Charlie rolled her eyes. “Yes, boys. Drink all you want. I’ll make sure you all get home safely.”

“Fine,” Castiel said, sounding determined as he got up again. He returned with two more shots for himself. “We’ll drink them together.”

Dean raised his drink, and Castiel raised his, and then Dean twisted their arms. “Ready?”

Castiel smiled. “Ready.”

They did their shots. And then the other two. Dean was finally starting to feel it. Four shots and one beer in, he was starting to dance at the table. Castiel had this giddy look on his face, chuckling every time Dean shimmied his shoulders to the music. Castiel found Dean absolutely hilarious, and Dean realized he liked making Castiel laugh.

They stopped with the shots but drank a glass of whiskey and two more beers each. Dean was drunk enough now that he was seriously starting to consider singing. He turned to Castiel, draped an arm around his shoulders, and pulled him in.

“Cas,” Dean whispered close to his ear.

“Dean,” Castiel whispered back, but his whisper was louder. “Why are you whispering?”

“What song—” Dean hiccupped. “What song do you want me to—” Hiccup. “Sing.”

Castiel widened his eyes. “Are you drunk enough now?”

Dean laughed. “Yeah. Yeah, I think I am.”

“Okay, okay, okay,” Castiel said, like he was trying to organize his thoughts. “Let’s go.”

“Wait, what? Are you going to sing too?” Dean asked.

Castiel nodded. “Yes. A duet. The two of us. Come on.” He was out of his seat, pulling on Dean’s arm to get him to stand up.

Dean stood up on wobbly legs. He hadn’t realized how drunk he actually was until he noticed the entire room was spinning. Whoa. “Charlie. Where’s Charlie?”

Charlie waved her hand. She was still at the table. “Dude, you are _wasted_. Are you really going to sing?”

“Yeah. I’m gonna sing ‘cause Cas wants me to sing. I can do this.” Dean followed Castiel up to the DJ. Castiel wrote their names on a sheet of paper and picked a song without telling Dean.

“You two are up next,” the DJ told them.

“Oh, shit,” Dean said, leaning against a wall.

Castiel leaned beside him, shoulders brushing. Castiel was staring at Dean with a wide grin on his face. “I can’t believe you’re going to sing.”

“You got me drunk.”

“I know.”

“You got drunk, too.”

“I know.”

“What song are we singing?”

“It’s a surprise.”

Dean tried to roll his eyes, but he forgot how to do it. “You and your surprises.”

And then Castiel grabbed Dean’s hand. “Come on, it’s our turn.”

They walked up to the stage together, hand in hand. Castiel grabbed one of the microphones, and Dean grabbed the other. The music started playing, and it took Dean a few seconds to recognize the song. _You’re the One that I Want._

“Oh, shit,” Dean said into the microphone.

“You’re John Travolta,” Castiel said.

“ _I got chills, they’re multiplying,_ ” Dean sang, like he was born to sing this song.

Castiel laughed before he sang, “ _You better shape up, ‘cause I need a man, and my heart is set on you_.”

The rest of the song was mostly a blur. Dean knew that he was butchering the song, but he kept his eyes focused on Castiel’s smile and lips as he sang. They were singing to each other instead of the entire bar. Dean pulled out some dance moves, all of which Castiel mimicked. Dean knew that if he was making a fool of himself, Castiel was doing the same thing. It made him keep going, without a care in the world.

Dean hadn’t realized the song had ended until Castiel was pulling him back to their table. Dean nearly fell on his face, but Castiel had a tight grip on him and kept him from falling. When they finally made it to their table, Charlie and Jo were laughing at them.

“That was unbelievable,” Charlie said. “Dean, I’ve never heard you sing before. Your voice doesn’t suck, my friend.”

“Did you choreograph that song?” Jo asked.

Dean shook his head. “I have no idea what just happened.”

“Okay, I think we need to go,” Charlie said. “You two are absolutely hammered. I need to make sure you get home in one piece.”

Dean tried to take a final sip of his beer but found that it was empty. “But I’m thirsty.”

“You can drink water at home,” Charlie said.

Before Dean knew what was happening, Castiel pulled Dean back to his feet. They walked to Charlie’s car, where she pushed them both into the backseat. Dean ended up sitting half on Castiel’s lap, but then he scooted to the side and he wasn’t on his lap anymore. He realized they were still holding hands, but he wasn’t sure why.

Dean looked over at Castiel, but Castiel had his eyes closed and his head leaning on the seat. He figured he was asleep, so he blurted out, “Hey, Cas, you’re pretty.”

Castiel opened his eyes, and his gaze fell directly on Dean. “What? I’m not pretty. Shut up.”

“Yeah. I like your face. I really like it.”

Castiel laughed. He laughed for a long time before he let go of Dean’s hands. Then he cupped Dean’s face in his hands. “Hey, hey, Dean.”

“What?”

“I like your face, too.”

Dean broke into a smile. “No way!”

Castiel nodded. “Yes, yes, yes.”

“That’s awesome, dude!”

Castiel dropped his hands from where they were holding Dean’s face. And then he leaned his head on Dean’s shoulder. “I think I’m going to puke.”

“Hey, not in my car!” Charlie said. “We’re almost there. Just hold it in a little longer. By the way, where do you live, Castiel?”

“Uhh, on Dunmore,” Castiel mumbled. “Apartments. On Dunmore.”

“Do you know your apartment number?”

“Sixty-seven.”

“Great. I’ll walk you in.” Charlie turned to Jo. “Keep an eye on Dean while I walk Castiel to his place.”

“You got it,” Jo said.

Charlie opened the door and helped Castiel to his feet. Before Castiel left, he turned to Dean and booped his nose once, smiling. And then Charlie was hauling Castiel out of the car, helping him up to his front door.

Dean’s head was still spinning, so he closed his eyes. All he could see was Castiel. Castiel singing, Castiel dancing, Castiel holding his hand, Castiel smiling. Dean hoped Castiel didn’t actually get sick from all the alcohol they’d had. That wouldn’t be good.

When Dean opened his eyes again, Charlie was at his door, telling him to get out of the car. Dean tried to argue that they weren’t at his house yet, but Charlie tried to convince him they were. Eventually, Dean got out of the car and followed Charlie up to his front door.

“Can you make it to your room?” Charlie asked, unlocking Dean’s door and handing him his keys.

“Sure can,” Dean said.

“Okay, make sure you sleep on your stomach in case you get sick.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Charlie gave Dean a soft pat on his back as he turned and went inside his house. The last thing Dean remembered was falling on his bed, and drifting off.


	7. Chapter 7

The sound of a phone ringing woke Dean up. It took him a few seconds to realize it was his phone. He pulled it out of his pocket and answered it without checking the screen.

“Hello?” Dean’s voice was groggy with sleep. His head weighed a ton. He felt slightly nauseated, but he didn’t think he’d get sick on his bed.

“Good morning, sunshine,” Charlie said in a sing-song voice. Way too loud for—Dean checked the time on his phone—ten in the morning. “Did I wake you up?”

“Yeah,” Dean croaked. “Lower your voice.”

“I just wanted to check up on you. Make sure you didn’t choke on your vomit overnight.”

“Nope. I survived.” Dean rolled over to his back. That was a mistake. The movement brought on a headache. Dean groaned.

“You sound like death,” Charlie said. “Do you remember anything you did last night?”

Dean tried to remember the events of the previous night. He remembered Castiel wanting him to sing, and then buying him shots and whiskey and more beer. Dean remembered drinking all of that. And then…

Dean sat up in one swift movement, which did not help his headache. “Oh no. Did I actually sing karaoke?”

“Oh, Dean. You didn’t just sing. You danced. A lot. You kept shaking your ass at Castiel and then you dropped your mic so you could use his and stand closer. It was really embarrassing, and I took video of everything.”

Dean groaned, grabbing a bottle of aspirin and heading to the kitchen for a glass of water. “I can’t be blamed for the embarrassing shit I do when I’m drunk.”

“You absolutely can!” Charlie laughed. “Dean, do you even remember what you did in the car?”

Dean took two pills and swallowed them with water. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Charlie laughed again, harder this time. “I can’t breathe. I gotta stop laughing. Okay, okay. I’ve calmed down.”

“Charlie.”

“Well, you and Castiel were in the backseat when I drove you home, and you were holding hands for some reason. Then, all of a sudden, you tell Castiel that he’s pretty. Just like that. Told the guy he’s pretty.”

Dean widened his eyes. _“I did not.”_

“You did! And then you told him you liked his face, and he told you he liked your face. I mean, it was absolutely ridiculous.”

Dean fell onto his couch, gaping at the wall ahead of him. He really needed to stop drinking. “I can’t believe I told him that. What the hell was I thinking?”

“I don’t think you _were_ thinking. I should have known you two were into each other. I mean, all that fighting must have built up a lot of sexual tension.”

“No, you got it all wrong.” Dean was on his feet, pacing his living room. “We were both drunk, and it didn’t mean anything. I don’t like Cas that way. At least, I don’t think I do. We’re just friends. I bet he doesn’t even remember what he said either.”

“You love being in denial, don’t you? Well, suit yourself. Call Castiel and ask him if he remembers what he said last night.”

“I’m not going to do that,” Dean said. But as soon as he hung up with Charlie, he called Castiel. Dean told himself he was only calling to check on him, not to ask him if he remembered the night before. But who was he kidding?

“What?” Castiel snapped on the other end of the line.

Dean scratched the back of his neck, pacing the floor again. “Hey, Cas. Good morning.”

“Dean, I’m fucking hung over. It’s not a good morning.”

“Yeah, me too. Were you asleep?”

Castiel let out a long sigh. “I didn’t sleep more than three hours. I’ve been throwing up most of the day. I’m not used to drinking that much.”

“Oh, shit.”

“Is there a reason you’re calling?”

Dean swallowed. “I was wondering if…you needed a ride to pick up your car at the bar.”

“No. Gabriel is going with me to pick it up. He’s on his way.”

“And once again, you avoid getting in my car.”

“Yes, I do.”

Feeling a little dizzy, Dean sat down on one of his couches. “So, about last night. What do you remember?”

“You mean, do I remember the embarrassing song we sang and danced to? Unfortunately, I do.”

And then Dean blurted out, “Charlie said I was flirting with you in the car.”

“Hmm. Well, I _am_ irresistible.”

“You don’t remember that?”

“Not at all. I have a lot of missing time in my memory.”

Dean bit on his lip. “She also said you flirted back.”

“Dean, I was drunk out of my mind. I would have flirted with a mannequin.”

Chuckling nervously, Dean grabbed his water and took a sip. His mouth was suddenly very dry. “I believe you.”

There was silence on the other end of the line. Dean thought Castiel had hung up. But then he said, “Did you call me just to ask if I remembered our drunk flirting from last night?”

_Fuck_. “No.”

“What exactly did you say to me, anyway? I’m curious now.”

Dean rubbed his face. “Uh, I told you that you were…pretty, and I said I liked your face.”

Castiel burst into laughter. “Pretty? I don’t think anyone has ever called me pretty before. What a line. I think you just made my day.”

Dean blushed, but then he laughed too. It was all a silly misunderstanding. “Apparently, you said you liked my face too.”

“And anyone with sight would agree with me,” Castiel said right away.

“Because I look like a mannequin?”

“Are you fishing for compliments again?”

“Maybe. I mean, I already called you pretty.”

Castiel chuckled. “It looks like Gabriel is here. I have to go now.”

“Alright. I’ll see you on Monday, Cas.”

“Goodbye, Dean.”

 

***

 

 

Dean and Castiel got into a nice routine at work. They had managed to stay mostly quiet while they worked, saving their conversations for their lunchtime. They decided to only go out to eat twice a week, and the other three days they ate in the breakroom. It was a good system they had. Having Castiel as a friend had turned out to be a good change in Dean’s life. He spent hours texting him when they weren’t at work. The constant pictures he got of Castiel’s cat was a plus.

The following Friday, as Dean and Castiel walked to their cars after work, Castiel turned to Dean. He looked a little nervous, so Dean got nervous. He wasn’t even sure why anyone was nervous.

“Hey, do you want to come to my place for dinner tonight?” Castiel asked quickly, almost as if he had to get the sentence out before he changed his mind.

Dean grinned. “You’re gonna cook for me, Cas?”

“No. I’m going to cook for both of us.” Castiel leaned against his car, which was, again, parked right next to Dean’s. “I usually cook large portions. I figured I’d invite you over so you don’t have to cook, and so I don’t have a ton of leftovers.”

“You got yourself a deal, man. I’ll be there. What time?”

“You can stop by around seven. I’ll have everything ready.”

“Sounds good. Text me your address.”

Castiel nodded, getting into his car.

That night, Dean brought a bottle of wine to Castiel’s apartment. When Castiel opened the door, he was wearing a white apron. But he welcomed Dean in with a bright smile.

Dean handed Castiel the bottle of wine. “Let’s go easy on the wine tonight.”

“Don’t remind me,” Castiel said, heading into the kitchen.

The place was small, but really cozy. The living room had two mismatched couches, a wooden coffee table, and a plasma TV hung on the wall. There were two bookshelves filled to the brim with books. Colorful plants sat on every corner. To the other side, the dinner table was already set for two. Blue tulips were the centerpiece. Dean leaned forward to smell them.

“What are you doing?” Castiel walked out of the kitchen, holding two plates in his hands.

Dean took the plates from Castiel and set them on the table. “Ooh, you made lasagna. It smells delicious.”

“It is,” Castiel said. “Can you grab two glasses from the shelf?”

“Of course.” Dean followed Castiel to the kitchen and found the wine glasses. When he realized Castiel was mixing a salad, he made a face. “Do you expect me to eat that?”

“Don’t say no to my salads until you’ve tasted them.”

“Why do you keep using that argument? It’s getting old.”

“You can’t blame me for trying to get you to eat healthier.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “My mom and Sammy gave up on that years ago.”

“Well, I’m not giving up yet.” Castiel brought the salad to the table.

Dean worked to open up the bottle of wine, and then he filled their glasses, but only halfway. They sat right next to each other on the small square table. The moment Dean bit into his lasagna, he let out a filthy sound. “How the hell do you cook like this, Cas?”

Castiel smiled and shrugged. “I taught myself. I like cookbooks.”

Under the table, Dean suddenly felt something brush against his leg. He looked at Castiel, wide-eyed, wondering why he was brushing his leg against Dean’s. But then he heard a low purr, and Dean wasn’t sure it was Castiel anymore. Dean looked under the table to find a familiar black cat.

“Sebastian came to say hi,” Dean said.

“I think he likes you. He usually hisses at visitors.”

“Hey, buddy.” Dean resisted the urge to scratch him because he was still in the middle of dinner. Sebastian brushed up against Dean’s leg again before meowing and walking away. “I like him.”

Castiel was smiling. One of his softer smiles that Dean was getting used to. “I wasn’t sure if you’d be up for this.”

“Why not? I like a free dinner.”

“We eat lunch together every day. I didn’t think you’d want to add dinner onto that.”

Dean sipped his wine. “This should be our thing. We’ll be the type of friends who have every meal together. I don’t mind.”

Castiel laughed. “You can’t be serious.”

“I am. Come to my house tomorrow. I’ll make dinner. I also make a lot.”

“Dean.” Castiel shook his head, smiling. “Okay.”

And just like that, Dean and Castiel had lunch and dinner nearly every day. It got to the point that when Dean found himself having breakfast alone on the weekends, he suddenly missed Castiel’s constant presence. Dean liked their lunches, but he preferred their dinners. They didn’t have to stick to one hour for their dinners, and he felt more at ease at their houses.

Since they lived so close to each other, Dean usually stuck around a little longer. He’d tried to get Castiel to watch _Crazy Ex-Girlfriend_ , and he’d managed to get him through a few episodes of the first season. Castiel also stuck around longer, and sometimes they would just sit and talk while listening to music.

Before Dean knew it, a month had passed like this. He was reminded of it because Sam called him one evening.

“Hey, Sammy,” Dean beamed, hearing the sound of Sam’s voice.

“How’ve you been?” Sam asked. “I feel like we haven’t talked for a while.”

“Really? I thought I called you last week.”

“No. You called me the week before that. You said you were hanging out with Cas.”

Dean nodded. “Oh yeah. Well, I hang out with Cas a lot. He’s a good buddy of mine.”

“Dean, he’s all you ever talk about.”

“What? No, he’s not.”

Sam sighed. “Okay, sure. Have you seen Charlie lately?”

“Yeah. After work sometimes. I don’t hear from her as much.”

“And who does Charlie spend most of her time with?”

“Jo, her girlfriend.”

“And who do you spend most of your time with?”

“Cas. What are you saying, Sammy?”

“All I’m saying is you spend a lot of time with someone who is just your buddy.”

Dean couldn’t believe what Sam was implying. Was it so wrong to spend some time with a good friend like Castiel? Dean didn’t have that many friends. He didn’t see anything wrong with it. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“It’s alright, Dean. So, can you believe I’ll be there in less than one month?”

Dean tried to remember what day of the month it was. “Oh yeah. Just a few more weeks until I see you again. Your bedroom is ready. I washed your sheets and everything.”

“Jess is excited to see you again, too.”

“Me too.”

“Have you talked to Mom lately?”

“Last week,” Dean said. “She said she’ll make sure she’s in town when you come home.”

“Where is she now?”

“Last I heard she was in Pennsylvania. But I doubt she’s there anymore. You know her job takes her all over the country.”

“Yeah, I know. I just haven’t heard from her in a while. I’m going to call her right now.”

“Tell her I said hi.”

“Did you tell Mom about Cas?”

Dean rolled his eyes. “No. Okay, yes. But only because she asked me about work. And he was with me when I talked to her.”

“How come you’re not with him right now?”

Dean cleared his throat. “He just left.”

“You know, I had a buddy like Cas once.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. Her name was Jess.”

“Fuck you, Sammy.”

Sam laughed. “I’m just saying.”

“Yeah, well save it. I don’t care what you think. Cas is my friend. There’s nothing more to it.”

“Okay, okay. Whatever you say, Dean.”

Dean hung up with Sam, only to find he had a new text. From Castiel. It was another picture of Sebastian. Dean smiled, and texted back.

**I fricken love that cat.**


	8. Chapter 8

Dean and Castiel were in the breakroom having lunch when a guy they’d never seen before sat at their table. It was such a shock that Dean could do nothing but stare at him. And stare. The guy was a brunette with a bit of scruff and a nice smile.

“Hi,” the guy said, looking from Castiel to Dean. “Mind if I join you?”

Dean looked at Castiel, who shrugged. “I guess.”

“Cool. I’m new here. Name’s Aaron.” Aaron took a bite of his sandwich. “How do you like working here?”

Dean wasn’t used to people approaching them like this. But it made sense for the new guy to do it. He decided to be nice to the guy. Why not? “It’s a good job. Customers can get angry sometimes and curse at you. You can’t let it get to you. It’s hard not to hang up on them sometimes, but you’re not supposed to. Other than that, it’s not bad at all.”

“Yeah, I figured,” Aaron said. “So, I heard you two are kind of a thing.” He motioned between them.

“What?” Dean said, suddenly alarmed. Who was spreading rumors? “We’re not…a thing. We’re just friends.”

“Alright, then,” Aaron said, smiling crookedly. “What’s your name?”

“I’m Dean. He’s Castiel.”

“I wasn’t really interested in him,” Aaron said.

Castiel was staring down at his salad. “I’m done with my food.” Without looking once at Aaron, Castiel got up and went back to his desk. They still had ten minutes left on their lunch.

“He’s kind of a jerk, isn’t he?”

Dean scowled. “Cas is _not_ a jerk. You’re the jerk here.”

“Whatever, man. So, what do you do for fun around here? I’d love to hit a bar.”

“The Roadhouse is close to here.” Dean tried not to get so angry over the way Aaron had treated Castiel, but it bothered him whenever anyone was rude to him. And yeah, he was aware that he’d been awful to Castiel for three years, but things were different now. “It’s a decent place.”

“Alright, sounds good. I’ll see you there after work, yeah?”

Dean narrowed his eyes. “What?”

“Let’s get together after work for drinks.”

“What makes you think I want to hang out with you?”

Aaron raised his eyebrows. “Are you seeing anyone?”

“No.” Dean crossed his arms.

“So what’s the problem?”

“Look, it doesn’t matter. I can’t have drinks tonight because I have plans with Cas.”

“Alright, then. When are you free?”

Dean tried to think of a night when he wasn’t planning on having dinner with Castiel. He couldn’t remember setting anything up for Sunday. But going out drinking on a Sunday night just didn’t sound appealing. “I don’t know. My schedule’s pretty busy.”

“Come on, dude,” Aaron said. “I don’t know anybody else in town. I’m trying to get out there and live a little. Throw me a bone.”

Guilt was settling in. Dean had been in Aaron’s place before. But he still didn’t like the way he’d talked to Castiel. “I’ll go to the Roadhouse with you on Sunday _if_ you apologize to Cas.”

Aaron laughed. “I didn’t do anything to him. What are you talking about?”

“You made him leave!”

“He said he was done eating.”

Dean glared. “Apologize to him first.”

Aaron threw up his hands in surrender. “Okay, okay. I’ll go apologize.”

When Aaron got up and headed to Castiel’s cubicle, Dean trailed behind him. Dean took his seat next to Castiel while Aaron tapped Castiel’s shoulder to get his attention. Castiel glared at Aaron’s hand as he withdrew it. If looks could kill…

“Hey, Cas—”

“It’s _Castiel_.”

“Sorry. Hey, Castiel, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable earlier. I didn’t mean it. Are we cool?”

Castiel continued glaring at Aaron. Then he went back to work.

Dean tried to hold back his laughter. He’d missed seeing this side of Castiel. The one that was always ready to fight. Castiel could be one intimidating son of a bitch.

Aaron turned to Dean. “Are we on for Sunday, Dean?”

Dean sighed. “Yeah. I’ll see you Sunday.”

“Awesome.” Grinning, Aaron turned and walked away.

When Dean turned his attention to his computer, he felt a strong gaze to his left. He glanced up and Castiel didn’t look away. “What’s up, Cas?”

“Dean, did you make him do this?”

“Do what?”

“Apologize.”

Dean shrugged. “Maybe. We’re going out for drinks on Sunday.”

“I heard.” Then Castiel was glaring at him. “You don’t have to fight my battles. Aaron didn’t make me uncomfortable. He irritated me.”

“He called you a jerk.”

“That’s because I _am_ a jerk,” Castiel said. “Dean, just stay out of it.”

“Are you okay with me seeing him for drinks?”

“I’m the last person you need to ask permission. What do you think this is?” Castiel motioned between them. “What do you think we are?”

“I just—Okay, never mind. Forget it.”

Things got a little weird as the day progressed. Dean tried to focus on his calls and ignore everything else around him. It was easier said than done. Dean had to listen to Castiel’s voice all day long. He had to hear him talk softly to strangers. Castiel never got angry on the phone, not at all. His voice stayed sweet, calm, and collected all day long.

When it was time to go home, Dean debated whether he should walk out with Castiel or not. And then he did, because he wasn’t an asshole.

They didn’t say anything until they got to the parking lot.

“Cas, hold on.”

Facing his car, Castiel pulled out his keys, but he didn’t get in.

“Am I still coming over tonight?” Dean asked.

Castiel faced Dean. Not with a glare this time. But he wasn’t smiling either. “I’m not in the mood to cook. So don’t bother.”

“You don’t have to—” Before Dean could finish his sentence, Castiel was already in his car. Dean waited until he was out of the parking lot to get inside his car. “Damn it!” He hit the steering wheel.

 

 

***

 

 

Ever since Dean got home, he had done nothing but check his phone for texts or calls that wouldn’t come. Dean wasn’t even sure what had happened earlier that day. Had he just had a fight with Castiel over the new guy? Why was he so angry, though?

Dean realized this was their first fight since they’d become friends, which was probably why it made him feel so much worse. There was a knot in his stomach. He didn’t know how to feel about the situation, but he knew the feeling wasn’t good.

It was almost 7 o’clock, and Dean was getting hungry. This was usually the time they got together to eat. Dean couldn’t believe he’d have to eat by himself tonight.

On an impulse, Dean grabbed his keys and wallet and got in his car. He picked up enough Chinese food for two, and drove straight to Castiel’s apartment.

Dean knocked on the door, holding the food in his other hand.

When the door opened, Castiel looked confused, and a little surprised.

“I know you said you didn’t want to cook, so I brought you food.” Dean held up the bag. “Look, Cas, I know I fucked up. I shouldn’t have told Aaron to apologize to you. I know you can handle him, and everyone else in the office. It’s what you’ve done for years. I should have known better. I’m sorry.”

Castiel squinted up at Dean, still silent.

“I hated the thought of eating by myself. I always do now. Food tastes so much better with you. I don’t want you to be angry with me. We did the angry thing for a long time and it didn’t work for us, remember?”

Castiel rolled his eyes.

“Can I come in?”

“Yes, Dean. Come in.” Castiel held the door open for Dean. Once Dean came in the door closed behind him.

Dean took out all the food from the bag and Castiel brought two plates to the table. They sat next to each other, not really saying much. He thought he caught a tiny smile from Castiel, but it was brief. 

“I like having you around,” Castiel said quietly.

Dean looked at him, willed him to look him in the eyes. “I like being around.”

Castiel nodded, satisfied. Then he picked up his fork and started eating.

After they finished their dinner, Castiel grabbed two beers. They moved to the couch and drank as they watched another episode of _Crazy Ex-Girlfriend_. When Darryl started singing about “Getting Bi,” they both burst into laughter, and the odd tension between them disappeared. It was another reason why Dean loved the show so much.

From the corner of his eye, Dean noticed Castiel fidgeting on the couch. He was shifting and sighing and sipping his beer. He’d known Castiel long enough to recognize the signs. Castiel wanted to say something, but he didn’t know how to say it. Dean wouldn’t push him, so he patiently waited until Castiel managed to say whatever it was.

As soon as the episode ended, Castiel turned to Dean. He tugged on Dean’s sleeve, and Dean turned, angling his legs and everything towards Castiel.

“Hey.”

“Hi.” Dean smiled.

“I never told you, but the weekend after we got stuck in the elevator, I lost my father. It was unexpected. I wasn’t close to him, but his death hurt me more than I thought it would. When I returned to work, you were there being nice to me, taking me to lunch. I spent so much time trying to get used to that new version of you that I forgot to hurt for my father.” Castiel ran a hand through his hair. “Having you around has been…good for me. In many ways.”

Every time Castiel showed his vulnerable side, Dean thought he was seeing another layer of him. There was so much he still didn’t know about Castiel, but he wanted to know everything. Dean had never expected Castiel to share something so personal with him, but now here they were. So Dean said the only thing he could think of at the moment.

“I lost my dad when I was twenty. I loved the hell out of him. He used to take me and Sammy hunting as kids. We hated it, but he loved it, so we did it for him. I stayed in the closet the entire time he was alive because as good as he was sometimes, John Winchester was homophobic. I loved my dad, Cas. But he never knew the real me. And for years that thought haunted me.” Dean shook his head. “I’m twenty-seven now, and I still regret never having the guts to come out to him.”

Castiel touched a soft hand to Dean’s cheek, and Dean leaned into the touch. “I never came out to my dad either. I never figured out how to tell him I’m pansexual. How do you explain something like that to a father who only cared about how rich his three sons became?”

“I guess we have more in common than we thought.”

Something shifted in the room. The air was getting tighter. Castiel was so close to Dean. His blue eyes were darker than ever. His lips were parted. Dean’s heart was racing, like it was expecting something thrilling to happen. Castiel’s thumb caressed Dean’s cheek, and it was so tender that Dean almost couldn’t bear it.

There was a knock at the door, and Dean jumped back, as though he’d been caught red-handed. He wasn’t sure what had happened to both of them, but Castiel looked disappointed as he stood to open the door.

“Hello, Cassie,” a bright voice said.

“Gabriel.”

Dean turned around to find a man in a neon shirt walk through the door. He was sucking on a lollipop. Gabriel didn’t have much of a resemblance to Castiel, but he knew they were brothers by the way Gabriel tilted his head and stared at Dean with a high intensity.

“You must be Dean,” Gabriel said, extending a hand for Dean to shake. Dean shook it. “My baby bro has ditched me multiple times these past few weeks for the sake of hanging out with you. He texted me today that he was free, so I swing by, and who do I find? None other than Dean Winchester, baby bro thief.”

“Gabriel, right?” Dean stood up.

Gabriel nodded. “You can call me Gabe.”

“Gabe, I’m sorry for taking up your time with Cas. I was just heading out anyway.”

“You don’t have to leave,” Castiel said.

“Cassie and I were just going to watch a movie and eat some popcorn,” Gabriel said. “You can stick around.”

Dean rubbed the back of his neck. “I don’t know. I don’t want to intrude.”

Gabriel wrapped a hand around Dean’s shoulders. “Stick around so I can interrogate you.”

“He’s not going to do that,” Castiel said. “Gabriel, please, leave Dean alone.”

Dean laughed nervously as Gabriel manhandled him back to the couch.

“Get the popcorn popping, Cassie,” Gabriel said, turning his wicked smile to Dean. “Dean and I will get to know each other in the meantime.”

“Gabriel,” Castiel said.

“He’s fine, Cassie.”

Castiel sighed as he reluctantly left to the kitchen.

Gabriel removed his arm from around Dean’s shoulders, but leveled his gaze on him. “What are you doing with my brother, Dean?”

“What—what do you mean?”

“Been spending a lot of time with him, haven’t you?”

Dean swallowed. “Yeah. I mean, we’re friends. We like hanging out.”

“Is that all you like to do with him? Just _hang out_?”

“What else would we be doing?”

Gabriel raised an eyebrow. “Are you really that clueless?”

Dean opened his mouth to reply, but Castiel returned with a bowl of popcorn. Gabriel gave Dean a look that told him they weren’t done with their conversation. Castiel put on the movie, a horror one Dean had never heard of, and sat on Dean’s other side. Being in the middle meant that Dean had to hold the popcorn.

The two hours the movie lasted felt eternal. Dean hardly paid attention to the movie. The moment Castiel leaned closer to Dean, Gabriel turned to Dean, giving him a look that was similar to the one Castiel gave to Aaron earlier. Things got worse when Castiel laid his head on Dean’s shoulder. Gabriel cleared his throat so much that Castiel got up to bring him a glass of water, and then resumed his position with his head on Dean’s shoulder.

Dean sighed a breath of relief when the end credits rolled. “Well, I better get home.”

“I’ll walk you out,” Castiel said.

Gabriel raised his eyebrows at Dean. “I think he can walk himself out, Cassie.”

“Yeah, I got it,” Dean said, rushing to the door.

Castiel ignored Gabriel as he walked with Dean outside, closing the door behind him. “I’m glad you came. Thank you for dinner. And for staying. I’m sorry about Gabriel.”

Dean waved a hand. “It’s no problem. We’re okay, right?”

Castiel smiled. “Yes, Dean. We’re okay.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow. Good night, Dean.”

“Good night, Cas.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the ["Getting Bi"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUDab9piv_U) video if you're interested in watching it.


	9. Chapter 9

“Tell me again why I’m not allowed to have lunch with you at work.”

Dean looked at Aaron long and hard before he took a big gulp of his beer. He’d debated whether or not to show up for their Sunday thing. In the end, he’d come because he didn’t want to be an asshole to the new guy. Aaron was new in town and he just wanted a friend. Maybe Dean could be that friend.

The lunch thing, though. That was hard to explain.

“Lunch is sort of my thing with Cas,” Dean said.

Aaron hummed. “So I can’t sit with you and Cas during lunch because, what, you talk about secret stuff?”

“No, nothing like that. I already told you, man. It’s my thing with Cas. We have lunch together every day. Besides, he doesn’t like you. He wouldn’t want you sitting at our table.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Aaron sipped his beer. “I forgot we’re still in high school.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Look, I can hang out with you outside of work. We can come to the Roadhouse, or whatever. Just not at work.”

Aaron looked suddenly interested in what Dean had said. He put down his beer and leaned in. “So you’ll make time for me after work? I thought you said your schedule was busy.”

Dean shrugged. “I can figure something out. You’re a nice guy. I’m a Lawrence native. I can show you around.”

A slow grin crept up on Aaron’s face. He was beaming now. “I would love that, Dean.” He downed the rest of his beer. “You want to go for a ride?”

Dean looked at his half-full beer. “Um, where would you like to go?”

“Anywhere. You drive.”

Dean was starting to regret his offer to show Aaron around town. It was late on a Sunday night, and Dean was a little bit sad he wouldn’t get to finish his beer. But he had given his word, so Dean took one last sip of his beer and led the way.

As soon as they got in the Impala, Dean felt a bitter twist in his stomach. When he turned to his right and saw Aaron, he struggled to smile, even though Aaron looked over the moon. He’d always pictured Castiel in the passenger seat of his car, windows rolled down, wind blowing his hair as Mick Jagger sang in the background. Not for the first time that night, Dean missed Castiel. A lot.

They got on the highway with the windows rolled down, but Aaron’s hair wasn’t blowing in the wind. It was too short for that. Dean turned up the music, but a few minutes later Aaron turned it down.

“Mind if we talk?” Aaron asked.

“Sure. What’s on your mind?”

“Are you happy?”

Dean looked at him briefly “Am I happy? What kind of question is that?”

“I don’t know. I’m just asking. Are you happy at work? In life? Overall?”

Dean wasn’t sure what to make of the question. His job was okay. It wasn’t his favorite place to work, but he was good at it. Plus, having Castiel around made it a hundred times better. His love life was boring as hell. He hadn’t dated anyone seriously in years, and his last hookup had been more than a year ago. Sometimes he wished Sam and his mom were just around the corner, but they had their own lives.

“Happy is kind of a big emotion, isn’t it?” Dean said.

Aaron snorted. “You’re not happy then.”

“I didn’t say that.”

“In many ways you did. Do you ever want more from life?”

Dean pondered that. “I guess I’d be lying if I said I didn’t.”

“Pull up right here,” Aaron said.

Dean didn’t even question why Aaron asked him to pull over on the side of the road. There was nothing but a large field there. Hardly any other cars on the road. “What’s over here?”

Aaron looked at him. “I have a philosophy in life, Dean. When you want more from life you don’t just sit there and wait for it. You go and take it.”

“That’s not bad.”

Before Dean could think any further on that, Aaron had crawled over to him. Strong hands pulled Dean’s face down and hungry lips pressed against his. Dean widened his eyes, standing completely still as Aaron continued kissing him. Gently, Dean pulled Aaron away from him, holding him up by the shoulders.

“What was that for?” Dean asked, still completely thrown off.

“I’m taking what I want,” Aaron said, chasing for Dean’s lips again. This time, Dean kept him away.

“Hey, man, I’m sorry. I don’t really want to do this.”

Aaron blinked, completely stunned as he moved back to his side of the seat. “Oh. I thought. I mean, I thought you did. You said you wanted to show me around.”

“Yeah. I did.” Dean ran a hand through his hair.

“Are you straight?”

Dean chuckled. “Not at all.”

“Oh. So there’s someone else.”

Dean swallowed, wondering why he couldn’t answer that as quickly as he wanted to. A thought was gnawing in his head. He thought of Castiel, and he wanted nothing more than to see him. What time was it? His dashboard clock read 11:03pm. Dean wondered if Castiel was asleep yet.

“Do you mind if I drop you off back at your car?” Dean asked. “There’s something I have to do.”

“Sure. I mean, since I just got rejected, it’s not like I can complain.”

“It’s nothing personal, buddy.”

Aaron laughed. “Gee, thanks.”

As soon as Dean dropped off Aaron, he drove straight to Castiel’s apartment. He wasn’t sure what he was doing there, or why it was so important to see Castiel at this time. But he knew that he had to do it. Dean knocked on Castiel’s door and waited. He waited for a while before Castiel opened the door, his bed hair messier than ever. Dean had the sudden urge to run his hands through it.

“I need to talk to you,” Dean said.

“What’s wrong?” Castiel asked, already pulling Dean into the living room. They both fell onto the couch, sitting close together. Castiel looked more awake than before.

“I was with Aaron. We were having a few drinks, then we went for a ride. And then, all of a sudden, he kissed me.”

Castiel pressed his lips into a tight line and didn’t say anything for a few seconds. “He kissed you.”

“Yeah, I was pretty shocked. I thought he wanted to hang out. You know, as friends. It was just a few beers. I wasn’t looking for a hook up.”

Castiel tilted his head. “What did you tell him after the kiss?”

“I told him I didn’t want that. Then he asked me if there was someone else, but I didn’t say anything.”

“And then you came here.”

“Yeah, I wanted to talk about it.” Dean rubbed his face with his hands. “I’m sorry if this is weird.”

Castiel pulled down Dean’s hands from his face and held them. “Why would it be weird?”

“I…don’t know.” Something told Dean that it would be weird, but he still didn’t know why. Things with Castiel were different. Special. Dean couldn’t name it, but there was a feeling deep inside of him every time he was with Castiel. Something that made him warm all over. It was the reason he was here so late at night. He needed that warmth, that reassurance.

“Dean, are you interested in Aaron?” Castiel’s voice was very quiet.

“No. I don’t think so. I thought he just wanted a friend.”

“It was obvious to me that he wanted something more,” Castiel said. “You really don’t notice much, do you?”

“I guess I don’t.”

Castiel chuckled. “Dean, I’d love to stay up and talk with you all night. But we both have work tomorrow. I’d like to go back to bed.”

Dean wasn’t sure what came over him when he blurted out, “Can I go with you?”

It took a moment for Castiel to process that question. “You want to go to bed with me?”

“Would you mind if I slept over?” Dean knew it made no sense for him to sleep over when his house was just a street over. He could even walk there if he wanted to. But he was still confused and a bit shaken up about what had happened with Aaron, and he wanted to remain in the comfort Castiel gave him.

“I don’t mind,” Castiel said, finally, as though coming to a decision. “I think I have some spare clothes and a new toothbrush for you to use.”

“Okay, cool.” Dean grinned. “And thanks.”

Castiel stood up and held his hand out for Dean to take. He pulled Dean into the room. Everything was neatly organized in the room, except for the bed that looked slept in, because it was. The bed was big enough for both of them, but Dean still wondered if he’d overstepped by asking Castiel to share it with him.

“Here are some sweats that I think will fit you, and a shirt.” Castiel tossed him the items from the dresser. “The toothbrush is in the bathroom.”

Dean nodded and went into the bathroom to change. Castiel’s sweats fit Dean a little tight, but not uncomfortably so. His AC/DC shirt was three sizes too big. Dean brushed his teeth meticulously, mostly to get the taste of Aaron out of his mouth. It suddenly dawned on him that he had run straight to Castiel after kissing Aaron. For some reason he’d felt extremely guilty for what happened with Aaron. He’d felt like he needed to come clean to Castiel about it. And now, what was he doing? Sleeping in his bed. Why? Why the hell did he think this was a good idea?

When Dean stepped back to Castiel’s bedroom, he found Castiel already curled up in bed, head under the blanket, with only his hair sticking out. Dean smiled fondly as he got in bed. He thought Castiel was already asleep, but then he spoke.

“Turn off the lamp light when you’re ready to sleep,” Castiel mumbled, peeking his eyes from under the blanket.

Dean flicked off the lamp, and they were covered in darkness. He lay on his back, wide awake, still unsure about how he’d ended up in Castiel’s bed of all places. This was not at all how he’d envisioned his Sunday night.

“Good night, Dean,” Castiel whispered.

Dean turned to him, even though he couldn’t see him. “Good night, Cas.”

No, this wasn’t how Dean had envisioned his Sunday night. It was so much better.

 

 

***

 

 

Dean woke in the morning to the sound of his alarm. After turning it off, he rubbed his eyes. There was very little sunlight coming into the room, but it was enough for Dean to know he wasn’t in his own bedroom. Slowly, the events of the previous night sank in. He remembered being with Aaron, and then going to see Castiel, and then spending the night. Dean shifted, and realized there was an arm around his waist. He tried not to wake Castiel as he shifted some more, but then a cat meowed.

Sebastian was curled up by Dean’s feet, and he wasn’t happy about being disturbed. Dean placed his hand over Castiel’s and lifted his arm off of him. Then he stood carefully, grabbing his clothes from the chair he’d left them. Castiel rolled over to his stomach, mumbling something incoherently. His hair was all over the place. There was a sleep mark on his cheek. He looked adorable. Dean smiled.

Before wasting more time, Dean left. He had to go back home to grab clean clothes and head to work. On his way to work he stopped to get two coffees.

As usual, Castiel was at his desk by the time Dean arrived. It looked like he’d sort of brushed the mess that was his hair. Castiel was doing something different today. He was humming.

Dean took his seat and listened as Castiel continued humming, drawing something on his notebook. “Morning, Cas. Brought you coffee.”

Castiel accepted the cup. “Thank you, Dean.” He took a careful sip. When he looked at Dean, a slight flush crept to his cheeks. Castiel quickly glanced down. “How’d you sleep last night?”

Dean grinned. “So good. Dude, I don’t know if it was your bed or your sheets, but I slept dreamlessly for the first time in I don’t know how long.”

“Did you?” Castiel looked smug about that. “Well, maybe it was me.”

“Maybe it was, since I woke up to you cuddling me.”

Castiel flushed again. Dean was starting to like this flustered version of Castiel. “I didn’t realize I was doing that.”

“Hey, Cas, it’s cool. I didn’t mind at all.” Dean shrugged. “It’s kind of embarrassing how long it’s been since I shared a bed with anyone, actually. That was probably more action than I’ve had in a year.”

“Didn’t you make out with Aaron last night?”

Dean scoffed. “That doesn’t count. I didn’t want it.”

Castiel raised his eyebrows. “But you wanted me to cuddle you?”

Dean opened his mouth, but nothing came out. And then he said, “ _You_ wanted—eh, never mind.”

Castiel smirked. Then he looked at something behind Dean that wiped the smirk right off his face. He clenched his jaw. “Your boyfriend wants you.”

Before Dean could react to that, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked behind him to find Aaron. “Hey, man. What’s up?”

Aaron looked from Dean to Castiel. And then back to Dean. “Can we talk? Alone?”

Dean glanced at the clock. “My shift’s about to start.”

“I know. It won’t take more than a minute.”

Dean sighed. “Alright.” Dean shared a look with Castiel as he followed Aaron to the breakroom, which was empty. “What’s going on?”

“Look, Dean, I just want to apologize for what happened last night. I read things wrong, and I acted on impulse. I didn’t know you were interested in someone else. If I’d known, I would have never asked you out for drinks in the first place.”

“It’s alright, man. You don’t have to apologize. It was just a kiss.”

Aaron nodded. “Thanks, Dean. You’re the best. And tell Castiel I’m sorry, too.” With that, Aaron left.

Dean was left very confused as he went back to his desk. Castiel was on the phone already, so Dean put his headset on and got to work. Between his phone calls, Dean wrote down a note for Castiel since he couldn’t wait for their breaktime.

**Aaron apologized for the kiss. And he said to tell you he was sorry too. Why do you think that is?**

Dean put the note in front of Castiel, but Castiel ignored it as he continued with his phone call. Dean was in the middle of a phone call when Castiel returned the note.

_How should I know?_

Dean remembered what Aaron had said, about Dean being interested in someone else. He never replied to him when he’d asked, but that didn’t mean there _was_ someone. Right? Unless, of course, Aaron was referring to Castiel. But that would be absurd. Dean and Castiel were just friends. There wasn’t anything else to it.

There couldn’t be.

 

 

***

 

 

That night, Dean had dinner at Castiel’s. Then they watched _Carrie_ —the original, not the remake—and Dean went home to his own bed. But the strangest thing happened. Dean tossed and turned, and sleep wouldn’t come. He was wide awake and restless. His first thought was that his bed was too big for himself. His second thought was that he was missing Castiel and Sebastian. His third thought was a little insane.

Dean grabbed his keys and headed for Castiel’s apartment. He considered walking there, but he was already in his pajamas, so he drove the short distance instead. Dean checked the time on his phone after knocking on the door. It was 11:32pm.

Castiel opened the door, squinting up at Dean. “Who kissed you this time?” Castiel asked, his voice more gravelly than usual.

Dean chewed on a smile. “No one. I promise I’ll stop doing this. I just couldn’t sleep. And I had no trouble sleeping here last night. Do you mind?”

Castiel stepped back, allowing Dean to enter. He walked back to his room, and Dean followed. They both crawled into bed, and Dean yawned. Castiel turned off the lamp this time, and a few seconds later, Dean felt Sebastian at the foot of the bed.

Dean turned on his side, his back to Castiel. He heard Castiel’s even breathing close behind him, and he wondered if he was asleep yet. “Cas?”

“Hmm?” Castiel sounded half asleep.

“Do you mind?”

Castiel didn’t need anything else from Dean to understand what he wanted. He threw an arm around Dean’s waist and shuffled closer. Castiel’s breath brushed against Dean’s neck.

Dean let out a deep breath. Sleep came easy after that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who else thinks Ed Sheeran's "Friends" song fits these two very well?


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This update took a little longer because I just read "The Long Walk" by Stephen King and it's taken over my life. But I hope you like this chapter!

When Dean woke up on Saturday morning in Castiel’s bed, he wasn’t as disoriented as he’d been the first time. Probably because Dean had been sleeping in Castiel’s bed all week. It could also be because Castiel was lying in front of him, staring at Dean with those intense blue eyes.

“Good morning, Cas.”

“Good morning.”

Dean stretched out his limbs, and smiled when he realized Castiel’s arm was still draped around his torso. Their sleeping arrangements had led Dean to discover that he very much enjoyed sleeping pressed up against Castiel, usually as the little spoon. They hadn’t exactly talked about it, but things had been normal between them so Dean wasn’t worried.

“Dean.”

“Yeah?” Dean glanced at him, lying still.

“Can I draw you?”

Dean grinned. “Like one of your French girls?”

Castiel tightened his arm around Dean. “You can keep your clothes on.”

Dean laughed and waited for Castiel to join in, but he didn’t. “Wait, you’re serious?”

Castiel nodded. “Can I?”

The thought of being drawn by Castiel while Dean lay in his bed was both thrilling and terrifying. He pondered it, but it didn’t take long for him to make up his mind. Castiel’s soft smile decided for him. “Of course.”

“Stay in bed.” In one swift motion, Castiel was on his feet, digging through a small desk in the room. He sat on the swivel chair, one leg tucked underneath the other, and he got to work. Castiel’s gaze was fully on Dean as his hand moved over the sketchbook.

Feeling self-conscious, Dean pulled up the blanket to cover him up to his neck. “Am I allowed to move?”

“You can move. Can you lower the blanket, though?”

Dean lowered it down to his waist. He was wearing a very thin shirt, but at least he was wearing something. There shouldn’t be a reason for him to feel nervous, but he had Castiel’s eyes on him, looking at him up and down, putting down every detail on paper. Dean’s heart was racing. “Am I allowed to talk?”

“You can talk.”

“No one has ever looked at me like that.”

Castiel smiled, and there was a slight flush to his cheeks, but he kept on drawing.

“Thanks for letting me crash here all week, Cas.” Dean heard a familiar purring and looked up to find Sebastian sleeping on Castiel’s pillow. “I’ve slept really well.”

“Me too.”

“Are you coming to my game night tonight?”

“Yes, I will be there. I’m excited to see Charlie and Jo again. They’re lovely people.”

“They really like you. Even after karaoke.”

Castiel shook his head. “Oh, no.”

Dean laughed. “We had fun that night. At least, I think I did. From the parts I remember.”

“We don’t talk about that night, Dean.”

Dean rolled his eyes.

“Keep it up. I will draw you with three eyes.”

Sebastian stretched out on Castiel’s pillow, pressing one of his paws against Dean’s nose.

“Hey, buddy, that’s my face.”

Castiel laughed. “That’s just how he shows affection.”

“Hmm. I feel special.”

“You should.”

Castiel continued drawing Dean with an incredible concentration. Dean liked to see him so focused on the task. After a while, Dean stopped feeling self-conscious and started feeling comfortable with himself. Castiel made Dean feel completely at ease, even though his eyes kept roaming Dean’s body unapologetically. Dean tried to stay still, but then Sebastian moved closer to him, and Dean started petting him. Sebastian was a sweet cat. Dean had never had a pet of his own, but he found he really liked cats.

Dean’s stomach growled, making Castiel chuckle. “I think I’m hungry.”

“Sorry about that. I’m all done, so we can go eat breakfast now.”

Dean sat up. “You’re done? Can I see it?”

Castiel hesitated, but then he handed Dean his sketchbook and sat on the edge of the bed. “I don’t know if you’ll like it.”

Dean let out a small gasp when he saw what Castiel had drawn. It was him. It was Dean, in Castiel’s bed, and he looked…stunning. The blanket was tangled around Dean’s waist, the wrinkles of his shirt looked so real. The amount of detail on Dean’s face was impressive. His freckles were prominent around his nose, and his morning scruff was shaded in perfectly. Dean looked contemplative in the drawing, like he wasn’t really there, like his mind was a thousand miles away. Dean had never looked this good in a photograph, and he wondered why he looked this good drawn by Castiel. Was this how he saw him?

For a few seconds, neither of them said anything. Castiel didn’t rush Dean as Dean continued looking at the drawing. Dean had no words to offer Castiel. He felt a surge of warmth from the pit of his stomach all the way to his cheeks. He felt like the center of attention, but the only one who was looking at him was Castiel, and that was enough for Dean.

“Cas, I love it.”

“You do? I wasn’t sure if you would. I don’t draw people often. But I wanted to draw you.” Castiel swallowed. “When I woke up, you were still sleeping, and you were smiling. I wasn’t sure why, but I couldn’t look away. You looked delicate.”

“Delicate?”

Castiel studied Dean’s face. “You looked surreal. I almost thought that if I reached out and touched you, you would disappear. For a moment I thought you weren’t really there. You looked delicate, breakable, dream-like.” Castiel looked away. “I’m rambling now.”

Dean reached out to lift up Castiel’s chin, making eye-contact again. “I’m not going to disappear. You know that, don’t you?”

Castiel gave a small nod and licked his lips. Dean couldn’t help but follow that action. When he looked back at Castiel’s eyes, he saw the question in his eyes. The moment was suddenly full of tension, but it wasn’t the bad kind. Dean had the sudden urge to move forward, to breach that small distance to Castiel. And it scared him. It scared the hell out of him.

Here they were, the two of them. They had been coworkers for over three years, cubicle neighbors who absolutely hated each other. Then they became friends, and Dean couldn’t remember what it had been like before. Dean couldn’t remember his life without Castiel in it. But Castiel couldn’t want the same thing Dean did. Castiel was the best thing that had ever happened to Dean. Castiel had it wrong when he said he thought that Dean would disappear. Dean was the one who worried that one day Castiel would just take off, leaving Dean’s life emptier than it was before.

Dean’s stomach growled again, making them both laugh, the tension dissipating. “How about I make you breakfast today?”

Castiel grinned. “You’re going to cook for me?

“Of course I am. You’ve been doing most of the cooking all week. It’s about time I took over.” Dean got out of bed, and pulled Castiel up to his feet. “You can go sit at the table and look pretty while I cook.”

“Well, we both know that’s the thing I do best.”

Dean winked at Castiel, heading into the kitchen. While he cooked, Castiel played some Led Zeppelin. Dean felt giddy as he poured the waffle batter into the waffle maker. He shook his hips as he made scrambled eggs. He played air guitar as he fried bacon. That was when he saw Castiel watching him from the doorway.

“Having fun?” Castiel asked, arms crossed, one eyebrow arched. His bed head was the only thing that made him less intimidating. Also, the fact that he was wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt with a lot of cats floating around in the universe.

“Uh, yeah, I’m almost done. Just need to get the coffee started.”

Castiel smiled. “I can do that.” Castiel got to work making the coffee, while Dean filled two plates with food. “So, do you always play air guitar while you cook?”

“Shut up.”

“You’re good. At air guitar, I mean.”

“Cas.”

“Maybe I can join your band with air drums. Can I audition?”

“I swear to God.”

“We can throw concerts. Go on tour.”

Dean picked up the plates, narrowing his eyes at Castiel. “Shut it.”

Castiel threw his head back in laughter. Dean shook his head as he went to set down the plates at the table. Castiel showed up with two mugs full of coffee—Dean’s was black, just like he liked it. “Can I have your autograph?”

“Alright, that’s it.” Dean launched himself at Castiel, tackling him to the ground. They both fell onto the carpet, Dean on top of Castiel, pinning his arms above his head. “Not so tough anymore, are you?”

Castiel arched his back. “How weak do you think I am?” Before Dean saw it coming, the world was spinning, and he was on his back with Castiel on top of him, knees pinning him at his sides. Now Dean’s arms were locked above his head, and he was unable to move. Castiel smirked. “Hello, Dean.”

“Fuck you.” Dean wiggled underneath Castiel, trying to find the room and strength to move out of his hold. It was nearly impossible. Castiel was stronger than he had anticipated.

“Breakfast first.” Castiel let go of Dean’s hands, and they somehow ended up on Castiel’s hips, holding him in place. Castiel leaned forward, setting his elbows carefully on Dean’s chest. “How does it feel to be down there?”

Dean arched his back and lifted his hips, making Castiel move with the action. “Peachy. Just peachy.”

“Good. Now let’s eat.”

And then Castiel was back on his feet, hauling Dean up. They sat next to each other at the table and began eating. Castiel had a smug look all morning, but Dean found he liked it. Come to think of it, there was very little he _didn’t_ like about Castiel. But even then, he liked those things, too.

After breakfast, Castiel washed the dishes while Dean dried them. They didn’t really need two people for the job, but Dean didn’t mind helping. Besides, that meant standing close to Castiel, which was better than not.

“Should I bring anything for tonight?” Castiel asked, breaking their comfortable silence.

“Just you.”

“What are you making?”

“Burgers. I told you I’d making you eat a burger someday.”

Castiel sighed. “I need to pick up groceries today. I’m all out because I’ve had someone staying at my place all week and eating all my food.”

“Wow, he sounds like a nightmare. You should tell him to go home.”

“I tried, but then he always comes back. I guess I’ll just have to get used to it.”

“Well, I’m going to the store today to pick up the stuff I need for tonight. We could go together.”

Castiel handed Dean another plate. “I might as well. I’ll make you carry all my bags.”

“What do I look like, a donkey?”

Castiel pinched Dean’s cheek with a soapy hand. “A very cute donkey, yes.”

Dean blushed, unexpectedly. “Whatever.”

 

 

***

 

 

They’d been in the cereal aisle for fifteen minutes, but Castiel still couldn’t decide on a cereal. Dean had tried to help him pick one out, but Castiel had deemed it too sugary. Then Dean held up a multigrain one that looked bland as hell, and Castiel thought it was not sugary enough. It was impossible to win with Castiel.

“I know that you like Cheerios,” Dean said, holding up a box. “You have two boxes at your place.”

Castiel scoffed. “I bought those for Gabriel. He loves Cheerios. I don’t.”

“Do you want something with chocolate, then?”

Castiel pondered that, hands on his hips. “No.”

“How about Lucky Charms?”

“Absolutely not.”

Dean groaned, and then picked up a box of Rice Krispies. “How about these?”

“Hmm. I like those. Okay.”

Dean gaped at Castiel, staring wide-eyed at how easy that had been, after _fifteen_ minutes of shutting down all of Dean’s suggestions. Dean put the box in Castiel’s cart and walked beside him to the milk section. “Oh no, please tell me you know which type of milk you like.”

Castiel smiled. “I do. I drink soy milk.”

“That’s gross. Why?”

“I’m lactose intolerant.”

“Good to know.”

“Do you remember if I have any mustard left?”

Dean had to think about that. “No. I finished it when I made a sandwich last night.”

“How about tomatoes?”

“You finished those.” Dean threw an arm around Castiel’s shoulders as they walked. “You can’t blame it all on me.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Surely I finished them cooking for you.”

“I’m going to cook for you tonight. I make the best burgers. I’m making pie for dessert.”

“Dean?”

Dean turned around, following the familiar voice. He was surprised to find Bela. Not the person he ever thought he’d run into. Dean slowly let go of Castiel’s shoulders, but he kept his hand on his back. “Hey, Bela. How’s it going?”

“Hi. Good. Everything’s good with me.” Bela stared quietly at both of them, a forced smile on her face. “I heard the rumors at work, but I didn’t believe them. I guess I was wrong. You two make a nice couple.”

Dean furrowed his eyebrow. “We’re not…”

“I’m glad to see you happy, Dean.” Bela turned and walked in the opposite direction.

“Did she just…”

“Yeah,” Castiel said.

“Is that—does that bother you?” Dean asked. He still didn’t know how to process the fact that everyone at their job believed Dean and Castiel were together. How long had these rumors been flying around? Who had started them?

“No. Why should it bother me?” Castiel picked up a yogurt.

“I don’t know.”

“Does it bother you?”

“No,” Dean said, simply. It didn’t bother him at all. But it disappointed him to know that the rumors weren’t true. It was something he would have to deal with on his own, though. Things were good with Castiel right now. Really good.

Dean wouldn’t ruin that.

 

 

***

 

 

Dean was grilling burger patties while Jo and Castiel sat on the patio chairs deep in conversation, and Charlie swung on the porch swing. Just as he was flipping over the patties, Charlie joined him, handing him one of the two beers in her hands.

“Thanks.” Dean took a sip.

"I think Castiel really likes Jo.”

“I can see that. How are things with Jo?”

Charlie beamed, her eyes lighting up as they always did when she talked about her girlfriend. “Things with Jo are unbelievable. She’s just as big of a nerd as I am. We’ve started LARPing together. We’re going to Comic-Con this year, and we’re cosplaying as Draco and Harry. I don’t know how I got so lucky, Dean. She’s the girl of my dreams.”

Dean smiled. “I’ve never seen you this happy. I’m glad you found your match, Charlie.”

“She’s the best.” Charlie cleared her throat. “How are things with Castiel?”

“Uh, good. They’re good.” Dean sipped his beer. “We’ve been sleeping together all week.”

Charlie spat out her drink, and Jo and Castiel looked over, worried. “I’m okay! I’m okay, guys!” Then she turned to Dean. “What the hell, Dean? Why didn’t you tell me you were sleeping together? What does this mean? Are you dating? Oh my God. You kept that a big secret, didn’t you?”

“No, no, dude. I’m not having sex with him. I’m just…sleeping in the same bed with him. It’s totally innocent, really. We mostly just cuddle. And we’ve been more physical with each other, but it’s all platonic.”

Charlie gave him a look. “That doesn’t sound platonic to me. You can’t be that stupid, right? Tell me you know how weird this sounds.”

Dean looked over at Castiel, and he felt that familiar warmth in his stomach at the sight of him. Castiel was so beautiful, but not just on the outside. Castiel was so kind, so honest, so selfless. Being with him made Dean feel braver and stronger than he had ever felt. Dean had never felt that way before with anyone else.

What Dean felt for Castiel, it was terrifying. It was consuming. It was something Dean had been trying to deny. But he couldn’t deny it any longer. He couldn’t deny the feelings he had for the man who was smiling a big gummy smile in his backyard.

“I know it’s weird, Charlie. I know. And I wish it wasn’t platonic. You have no idea how much I want him.”

Charlie clapped Dean’s shoulder. “Took you a while to accept that, didn’t it? So, what are you going to do about it?”

Dean sipped his beer. “I don’t know. I don’t want to lose him.”

“Why would you lose him?”

“Because we practically just started being friends. I can’t just tell him I want more. I can’t scare him off. I wouldn’t know what to do without him.”

“Dean, I was so scared to tell Jo how much I liked her. I didn’t think she’d like me back. But look how happy we are now.”

Dean smiled. “I know.”

“Are you going to tell him, then?”

Dean looked down at the patties, flipping them over again. He didn’t know how to answer Charlie’s question, and he was relieved when Castiel showed up and told Charlie that Jo wanted to show her a video on her phone. Charlie went over to Jo, but Castiel stuck around.

“Hey,” Castiel said. “Need any help?”

Dean shook his head. “I got it covered. Hey, uh, can I tell you something?”

Castiel smiled softly. “Of course, Dean.”

Dean stared into Castiel’s eyes, and he tried to get the courage to tell him the truth. How hard could it be? Maybe there was a possibility that Castiel would return the feelings. But what if he didn’t? What if Castiel rejected him and felt very uncomfortable that he’d allowed Dean in his bed when Dean had feelings for him? What if Castiel never wanted to see Dean again?

The fear overpowered his courage, and Dean frowned.

“I just wanted to say, I hope you like your burgers.”

Castiel tilted his head. “Are you sure that’s all you were trying to tell me?”

“Yeah. Yeah, that’s all. And hey, I’m glad you’re here.”

“I’m glad I’m here, too.” Castiel touched Dean’s arm. This was their thing now, the soft touches. Dean had gotten used to them. “So, I was thinking, maybe I can stay here tonight.”

Dean raised his eyebrows. “That sounds good. Yeah, let’s do that.”

“I might have to bring Sebastian.”

Dean smiled. “That sounds even better.”

“Good. I’m looking forward to it.”

“You should. My bed’s memory foam. It remembers you.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Not that you’re ever hard to forget.”

“I’m not?”

“I’m saying a lot of things.”

Castiel laughed. “You’re adorable when you’re nervous.”

With that, Castiel went back to Charlie and Jo, leaving Dean gaping behind him.


	11. Chapter 11

Dean stood on his front porch as Charlie and Jo pulled out of his driveway. Jo was waving at him, so Dean waved back. A few seconds later he realized that Castiel was standing beside him, waving as well. Castiel touched the small of Dean’s back and smiled up at him. He was only a couple of inches shorter than Dean.

“Hey, there.”

“I’m going to head home for Sebastian, but I’ll be right back.”

“You need a ride?”

Castiel frowned, looking over at the Impala. It was a heavy frown, and it worried Dean that there was more to Castiel’s hatred of Dean’s Impala than its so-called _ancientness_. There was a crease on Castiel’s forehead, but then he shook it off, and smiled again. “I’ll be right back.”

Dean nodded. “I’ll be here.”

While Castiel was gone, Dean washed the dishes and put the kettle with water on the stove. Castiel was an avid tea drinker, especially in the evenings. Dean had gone out and bought the kettle just for him. He’d picked up a variety of teas, but he knew Castiel usually drank peppermint tea. It smelled good.

Castiel let himself in, calling out to Dean.

“In the kitchen,” Dean called back.

Sebastian walked into the kitchen before Castiel, going straight to Dean’s legs, circling them and purring. He looked excited to be there.

“What are you doing?”

“Making tea.” Dean motioned to the boxes of teas on the counter. “Which one do you want tonight?”

Castiel gave Dean another one of his soft smiles. “Peppermint will be fine. I didn’t know you drank tea, Dean.”

“I don’t.” Dean rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s all for you.”

Then something happened. Something unexpected, but not unwanted. Castiel strode forward, determined, and threw his arms around Dean, pulling him into a hug. It took a moment for Dean to react, but then he hugged Castiel just as tightly, burying his face into Castiel’s neck. Despite all their nights of cuddling, this felt different. This was a different closeness, and Dean liked it. He relished in it. The feeling of Castiel pressed completely against him, his arms holding him securely, safely. Dean didn’t know what he’d done to deserve this, but he would take it. He would take whatever he could.

Castiel pulled away, but just barely, and he kissed Dean’s temple. It was a small kiss, tender and soft, but Dean felt his cheeks heating up. Castiel had reduced Dean to a teenage boy, and he didn’t give a damn anymore.

Castiel cleared his throat, finally letting go of Dean and adjusting his shirt. “Would you like some tea? It’s good, I promise.”

“The peppermint one did smell good. I guess it wouldn’t hurt.”

“Great. I’ll make it. You can go wait in the living room with Sebastian.”

“Yes, sir.” Dean touched Castiel’s arm as he headed to the living room. He didn’t even need to call for Sebastian, because he followed without command.

Once sprawled on the couch, Dean put on another episode of _Crazy Ex-Girlfriend_. It was his favorite thing to watch with Castiel because he laughed at all of Dean’s favorite parts. It was obvious how much he liked the show, even though he pretended he didn’t.

Castiel joined Dean on the couch with their teas. Dean took a tentative sip, and it scalded his tongue a little bit. Then he took another, and he could taste the peppermint. It was a soothing taste. Dean took another sip before he set his cup down.

“Do you like it?” Castiel had been watching him.

“It’s good. I never thought tea would be good. It has a good flavor.”

“I make a pretty good milk tea. I’ll make it for you someday.”

“I’ll try anything once.”

Castiel smiled. “This show again? You know, I don’t understand why Rebecca is so obsessed with Josh. The guy isn’t charming at all.”

“I think that’s the point. You’re not supposed to root for them.”

Sebastian jumped to the couch and curled up between the two of them.

“I hope she realizes she’s just wasting her time liking someone who’s never going to like her back.”

Dean swallowed. His heart was racing. Could Castiel hear it? “Sometimes you can’t help it.”

“I guess.”

They stayed mostly quiet for the rest of the episode, only breaking the silence to laugh. The entire time, Dean kept thinking about what Castiel had said. Was Dean wasting his time liking Castiel? What were the chances that Castiel could return his feelings? Well, the first clue Dean had was that Castiel was there, in his house, with his cat, and he was going to spend the night. Castiel had to like Dean in some capacity for that.

“Dean?”

“Yeah?” Dean turned to Castiel.

“The episode’s over.”

“Oh. Do you want to see another one or go to bed?”

“Can I talk to you first?”

Dean furrowed his eyebrows, suddenly worried that Castiel had been reading his mind. That meant that Dean was probably losing his mind. “Sure. What’s going on?”

Castiel sat cross-legged on the couch, facing Dean. He was petting Sebastian. “I want to explain why I haven’t accepted any rides from you. I know I told you that I don’t like your car. It’s true, I don’t. But I don’t want you to take it personally. Your car is fine. I guess it’s even kind of nice. That’s not the point. I just…I have this resentment towards old cars.” Castiel let out a long breath. “My mother, she used to drive a ’68 Camaro. It was red, beautiful. She bought it herself, and she cherished that fact. Most of her life, my dad bought her everything she wanted. But this car, she bought it herself.” Castiel chuckled. “It was her fourth child, in many ways. But then one day, she went for a ride and the brakes stopped working. She drove off the road, hit a tree, and she died. Just like that.”

“That’s awful, Cas. I had no idea. I don’t blame you for not wanting to get in my car.” Dean wanted to offer Castiel some type of comfort, but he wasn’t sure how. He did the only thing he could do, and held his hands. Castiel laced their fingers together.

“It’s kind of stupid, if you think about it.”

“No, it’s not.”

“I just—I miss her sometimes. She was a scary woman, but she was a great mother. She would always take me and Gabriel to get ice cream before dinner. Michael never went with us because he said our father would be upset if he found out. But she did things like that, just to piss him off. I don’t think she ever loved my father. I grew up believing marriages were bleak affairs. I thought I would end up with a woman who would have my children, and we would fight all the time. I would hate every minute of it. When I let my father stop controlling my life, I knew I would never allow that to happen.”

“I think you deserve all the happiness life can give you.”

“So do you.”

Dean stared at Castiel, wondering if Castiel could read the truth in Dean’s face. _My happiness is with you._

“Should we go to bed?” Castiel asked.

Dean nodded, pulling Castiel to his feet. They walked to the bedroom, holding hands, Sebastian following behind. Dean could fool himself into believing this was more than him and his friend sharing a bed for the night. Dean could pretend that this was more than friendship. But it was a dangerous game to play.

They turned off the lights and crawled into bed, curled up under the sheets. Castiel draped an arm around Dean’s middle, Dean’s back pressed against Castiel’s chest. Dean shivered involuntarily when he felt Castiel’s breath on the nape of his neck. When he felt the press of Castiel’s lips on his neck, Dean stayed very still. He didn’t want to disturb the moment. But every kiss sent a thrill all the way to his toes. The kisses were soft, like the one he’d given him in the kitchen. Castiel’s hand reached for Dean’s and they laced their fingers again.

Somewhere between the kisses, Dean fell asleep.

 

 

***

 

 

A week later, Dean was on the way to the airport. He was singing along to his music. He didn’t stop even when people stared. Dean was having a good day, and nobody could ruin that. Today, he would get to see his baby brother after many months apart. His mom was on the way to his house, where Castiel was waiting for her. Dean finally got to have all his favorite people together. It was a very good day.

Dean parked and stepped outside, leaning against the Impala as he waited. Sam would be easy to spot among the crowds. He was usually the tallest one. It didn’t take long before Dean spotted Sam, tucking his long hair behind his ear and rolling his suitcase. Beside him, Jess looked short, but she wasn’t short at all. Everyone was short next to Sam. Jess’s hair was blond and curly, and she grinned widely when she noticed Dean.

“There you are,” Jess said.

“Hey, you. It’s good to see you again.” Dean pulled Jess into a warm hug, and then turned to look up at his brother. “Sammy, you’re letting your hair get longer than your girlfriend’s.”

Sam laughed, pulling Dean into a hug. “I missed you, Dean.”

Dean squeezed his brother. “Missed you, too, kiddo.”

“How come you’re by yourself?” Sam asked as Dean opened up the trunk to load up their suitcases. “Where’s Cas?”

“Uh, he’s at my place. Waiting for Mom.”

Sam raised his eyebrows. “Oh, really?”

“Yeah. He’s great. Please don’t be weird around him.”

Sam scoffed. “Dean, I’m offended. I would never tease you about your boyfriend.”

“Cas is not my boyfriend.” Dean pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Wait, I thought he was your boyfriend,” Jess said.

Dean wasn’t sure how he would survive the day. He threw his arms up in frustration and got in the car. When Sam and Jess were both inside the car, he turned to both of them. “Cas isn’t my boyfriend. Don’t say it or imply it around him. Even if he spends the night at my place.”

From the passenger seat, Jess was smirking. “Okay. So this man spends the night at your place but he’s not your boyfriend. Does he sleep on the couch?”

“No. He, uh, sleeps in my room.”

Sam laughed. “With his clothes on?”

“Yes, Sammy, with his clothes on.”

“I told you my brother was strange,” Sam said.

Jess gave Dean a soft smile. “We’ll be on our best behavior, Dean. You don’t have anything to worry about.”

Dean sighed. “Thanks, Jess. At least I can count on you.”

“Hey, I’m trying to be understanding here, too!” Sam said.

Dean rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah.”

 

 

***

 

 

The first person Dean saw when he entered his house was his mom, sitting on the couch with Castiel. God knew what they were talking about because she was smiling like Dean had never seen her smile before.

“Mom,” Dean said, lowering Jess’s bag and going straight to her. She wrapped her arms around him, kissing the top of his head the same way she’d done since he was a boy. “When did you get here, just now?”

She nodded, holding Dean by the shoulders. “Look at you. I feel like you’ve grown. You’re getting thinner, too. Are you eating right?”

Dean shook his head. “Mom, I’m eating three meals a day. I’m fine.”

“Is he telling the truth?” she asked Castiel.

Castiel was standing beside her. “Yes. I cook most of his meals, so you don’t have anything to worry about.”

Suddenly, she looked behind Dean, her eyes glowing. “Sammy, come here.”

Dean moved aside as Sam approached their mom and embraced her. Once his mom was done with Sam and Jess, Dean introduced them both to Castiel. Fortunately, Sam and Jess were both polite and didn’t tease Dean about anything. “Can I get drinks for everyone?”

They all told Dean what drinks they wanted, and Dean went to retrieve them from the fridge. It was difficult to carry all of them by himself, so he was relieved to find his mom had followed him to the kitchen to help.

“Dean, sweetheart, what are you doing with that boy out there?”

“Cas?” Dean knew the question would come up sooner or later. He just hadn’t expected it this soon.

“He’s a lovely boy. I was getting to know him. Good morals, great attitude. He seems to care about you.”

Dean shifted on his feet. “I care about him, too.”

“I know. It’s obvious. But you still haven’t answered my question.”

Dean shrugged. “I don’t know, Mom. He’s Cas. He’s my friend.”

“There’s more to it than that, isn’t there?”

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

She nodded. “It’s okay. I understand. You never liked rushing into the important things anyway.”

Dean lifted up the drinks. “I better take these out.”

“I’ll take the rest. Go on.”

Dean handed everyone their drinks, and then took a seat beside Castiel on the couch. Almost unconsciously, Dean wrapped an arm around Castiel’s shoulders. He realized too late what he’d done, and he couldn’t move his arm because Castiel had already leaned in closer. Sometimes they just gravitated to each other.

When his mom joined them in the living room, she sat on the recliner at the corner, leaving Sam and Jess on the loveseat.

“How was the drive over, Mom?” Sam asked.

“It was fantastic. You know I love being on the road. I was in Illinois for a few days before I drove here. I’m going to Mississippi next.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, what kind of work do you do, Mrs. Winchester?” Castiel asked.

“Please, call me Mary, son. I do boring work. I go to hospitals all over the country to train them how to use the software my company sells. Truth be told, I only took the job for the sake of traveling. I love being on the road. But I’m getting old. I’ll have to settle down eventually.”

“You’re not old,” Dean said. “You got a lot of years ahead of you.”

“I taught him to say that,” she told Castiel.

“That sounds like a fascinating job,” Castiel said.

“It’s better than answering customer service phone calls,” Dean said, laughing into his drink.

“I’m sure you like your job,” Sam said. “You’ve been doing it for five years.”

Dean shook his head. “I like the bonus I get at the end of the year. A couple thousand dollars is worth all the bullshit I have to put up with.”

Sam glanced at Castiel. “What about you, Castiel? Do you like your job?”

For the first time in the day, Castiel looked uncomfortable. He looked at his hands on his lap before answering. “I don’t particularly like it.”

Dean snorted. “See? Nobody likes that job.”

“Have you looked into any other jobs?” Jess asked.

Dean wanted to roll his eyes. What was with the sudden interrogation?

“Yes,” Castiel said, quietly. “I have.”

That took Dean by surprise. “What?”

“I’d rather not talk about it right now,” Castiel said.

“Are you—wait, are you quitting?” Dean asked.

“Dean, I don’t think this is the time to discuss it.”

“Cas, I think I deserve to know if you’re quitting work. I’ve been sitting next to you for three years.” As if that actually meant anything. But it was Dean’s only argument.

Castiel looked around the room, eyes wandering until he looked at Dean. There was a strange nervousness that Dean didn’t like. Whatever he was going to say, it was bad. “I’m putting my two weeks’ notice tomorrow.”

“Oh.” Dean shifted, and suddenly the arm around Castiel’s shoulder was gone. He wasn’t sure why he felt so disappointed in the news. “Where will you work now? Do you have any leads for a new job?”

Castiel looked away, chewing on his lip. “I already accepted a job offer. It’s at a community college. I’ll be an art teacher, teaching drawing classes. It’s my dream job.”

Dean smiled. “That’s great, Cas. That’s amazing. Why didn’t you tell me before? We would have gone out to celebrate.”

Castiel rubbed the back of his neck, which he’d mostly likely picked up from Dean. “It’s in Pratt. The college, it’s in Pratt, Kansas.”

Dean blinked, trying to remember where Pratt was. He’d been there before. And then it hit him. He sat up quickly, his heart falling and breaking. “That’s—Cas, that’s like four hours away from here.”

“I know.” Castiel closed his eyes. When he opened the again, he still couldn’t look at Dean. “I didn’t know how to tell you.”

“You didn’t know how to tell me you were leaving? Cas, you’re moving four hours away. You’re—you’re fucking leaving.” Dean should have known. He should have seen it coming. He should have never gotten comfortable with Castiel’s constant presence. Castiel was leaving. Dean was losing him. No, he’d never even had him.

“Dean.”

Dean was out of his seat, heading to the backyard. He needed some fresh air. He stood there, the sun beating down on him. It was hot. It was uncomfortably hot. But Dean wasn’t going to go back inside. His day had been going so well, nothing was supposed to ruin it. Dean should have known. He shouldn’t have let his guard down. Of course Castiel would leave. Of course he would. He had no reason for staying. Dean had been so stupid.

“Dean, talk to me.” Castiel was outside, placing a hand on Dean’s shoulder.

“You’re leaving, Cas. What do you want me to say?”

“I didn’t want to leave. I swear I didn’t. But this is my future. It’s my life. I want this job. You have no idea how much.”

“You’re leaving.”

“I know.”

Dean closed his eyes and he felt a tear slip out. He wiped it away. “Fuck.”

“Tell me why this hurts you so much. Tell me. I know why it hurts me.”

Dean clenched his jaw, staring straight ahead. He didn’t want to look at Castiel. Not now. “What do you want me to say?”

“Tell me the truth, Dean.”

“What truth?”

Castiel sighed. “I think it’s better if I go home.”

“Do whatever you want.”

Castiel didn’t say anything else as he went back inside the house. Dean stayed outside for what felt like hours. When he went back inside, the sun had gone down. He found Sam and Jess cooking in the kitchen, and his mom watching TV. Dean grabbed a beer and sat on the couch.

“Tough day?” his mom asked.

“Yeah,” Dean huffed, keeping his eyes on the TV, even though he wasn’t really watching what was on the screen.

“How did you leave things with Castiel? He left looking upset.”

“I don’t want to talk about him.” Dean took a big gulp from his beer.

“When I asked you what was going on with him, you said you were just friends. Isn’t that right?”

Dean nodded, drinking again.

“Then why do you expect him to notify you the second he makes a decision? The boy has the right to keep things to himself.”

“He’s leaving.” Dean felt the bitter words escape him. It was his mantra today. _He’s leaving, he’s leaving, he’s leaving_.

“Are you going to let him go without telling him how you feel?”

Dean snorted. “It doesn’t matter how I feel. He already made up his mind.”

“Don’t you think he deserves to know?”

Dean thought about that. What could he lose by telling Castiel how he felt? Castiel was leaving anyway. Dean had already lost him. Castiel could react in many ways if Dean told him, but in any of those scenarios, he would still leave. Dean had absolutely nothing to lose now. He downed the rest of his beer and stood up.

“I’m going to tell him.”

Sam and Jess walked out of the kitchen. They were nosy people.

“Did we just hear right?” Sam asked.

“Are you going to tell Castiel how you feel?” Jess asked.

Dean rolled his eyes. “I’m going to go before I regret it.”

“Good luck, honey!” his mom said.

Dean decided to skip the drive and walked to Castiel’s apartment instead. The night was cooler, and there was a light breeze. Dean’s head was a jumbled mess. There were a thousand things he wanted to say, but he wasn’t sure any of it would come out right, or make any sense. He kept reminding himself that it didn’t matter what he said because Castiel was still leaving. He was leaving. Dean wasn’t going there to stop him. He was just there to tell him the truth. Castiel had wanted the truth earlier. Well, he was going to get it.

The sight of Castiel’s door was terrifying. Dean approached it slowly, his palms growing sweaty. He counted to ten before he knocked on the door, and waited. It was probably the longest wait of his life. But then Castiel opened the door, about ten emotions crossing his face, but confusion taking over in the end.

“What are you doing here?” Castiel asked, and he sounded angry all of a sudden.

“Can I come in?” Dean asked, letting himself in.

Castiel closed the door and leaned against it, looking tired. “Why are you here? I thought we were done talking earlier.”

Dean left a safe distance between them. “I’m here to tell you the truth. I hope you still want to hear it, because there’s a big chance you won’t like it.”

Castiel crossed his arms. “Try me.”

“Cas, I don’t want you to go, but I’m not here to ask you to stay. I’m here to tell you that…I have to tell you that…I love you. I fucking love you. I never planned for this to happen. I don’t even know when it happened. But the more time we spent together, the closer I wanted to be with you. I couldn’t get close enough. I still can’t. It’s fucking nuts, okay?” Dean ran a hand through his hair. “I love you, Cas. And I know it’s not what you wanted to hear. I know you probably didn’t want this. But I had to tell you.” Dean swallowed. “I had to tell you because I’m losing you, and I don’t know what to do.”

Castiel moved faster than Dean had ever seen him move, and he was moving towards Dean. Before Dean knew what was happening, Castiel grabbed the back of Dean’s neck and pulled him down until their lips met. Castiel kissed Dean with a hunger that was surprising. It was like he’d been starving for days, and Dean was the banquet he’d been waiting for. Dean kissed him back, opening up his lips when Castiel licked them. Dean held Castiel’s hips as he pushed him back until they hit the door. Castiel licked the inside of Dean’s mouth, his hands roaming Dean’s chest eagerly.

Dean fit his thigh between Castiel’s legs, and Castiel let out a soft moan. After a while, the kiss slowed, the hunger diminishing, turning into something different. Every kiss was languid, chaste, like they had all the time in the world. Castiel dug his hands inside Dean’s shirt and continued touching him, soft caresses that made Dean shiver. Castiel bit Dean’s lip and then gave him a few more pecks that were so sweet they made Dean’s knees wobbly.

Castiel held his gaze. “You’re not losing me, Dean. Never think that, okay?”

Dean nodded, pressing their lips together again. Now that he had this, he wasn’t ready to give it up. It was so good. Dean had never felt this ridiculously happy kissing someone. His senses were heightened. He felt so alive.

Dean could keep doing this forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I listened to this [song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrMAfMbZOmg) on repeat while I wrote this chapter.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mature content starts in this chapter.

They moved to the couch to talk, but as soon as they sat down, Dean pulled Castiel close and kissed him. Castiel crawled onto Dean’s lap, digging his hands into Dean’s hair, kissing him in earnest. Dean was panting when Castiel broke away to kiss down his jaw, and his own hands moved to Castiel’s ass.

“I thought we were going to talk,” Dean said.

Castiel nipped Dean’s earlobe. “We’re talking.” And then he sucked the sensitive skin beneath Dean’s ear, long enough to bruise.

“I’m…very distracted.”

“I’m listening, if you want to talk.”

Dean tightened his hold on Castiel as he bit down on his neck. He knew there would be marks there. “I’ve wanted this for two months, Cas.”

“I’ve wanted it for three years,” Castiel whispered into his ear.

Dean leaned back, blinking up at Castiel, whose lips were pink and swollen. “What?”

Castiel pressed a small kiss to Dean’s forehead. “Do you remember the first day we met at the office? When you came to sit next to me?”

Dean nodded. He thought about that day more than he was comfortable admitting.

“You showed up with this big beautiful smile, in slacks and a green button-up shirt that matched the color of your eyes. From the moment I saw you, I knew you would make my life a living hell. You were the most handsome man I’d ever seen. And I knew that you, like everyone else, didn’t like me. I was rude to you not just because I was on the defensive, but because I was angry at how much I wanted you.

“I convinced myself that I was only attracted to you because of your looks. It was my only consolation. I thought that I could have my crush as long as it stayed a superficial crush. But everything you did was endearing. You ate so much chocolate, but it always made you smile, and I lived for your smiles. You would read the most generic looking books on your breaks, and you would often gasp, like you couldn’t believe what you were reading. The worst part of all was at lunchtime, when you would watch that show. Your laughs, Dean, they killed me. Your laughter was the best sound I had ever heard.” Castiel licked his lips, holding Dean’s gaze.

“When you asked me out to lunch the first time, I knew I had lost the war,” Castiel continued. “You were kind and caring on top of everything. You were thoughtful. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to contain the way I felt for long, but I tried. I knew there was no going back for me, but I wanted you to make the first move. I told myself that I wouldn’t rush you into anything. I had gotten myself into this mess, but I wouldn’t drag you down with me.”

The truth hit Dean like a thousand-pound weight. All this time, all these years, Castiel had wanted Dean, and Dean had been sure he’d hated him. Dean had spent so long fighting with Castiel, antagonizing him as much as possible, but Castiel hadn’t wanted that. Dean couldn’t believe how stupid he’d been all those years. He could have made an effort sooner. He could have had _this_ sooner.

“You never hated me?” Dean asked, because his brain was mush and he couldn’t think straight.

Castiel smiled softly, his thumb caressing Dean’s lips. “I could never hate you, Dean. I could only pretend, to keep my sanity. I love you, too.”

Dean kissed the corner of Castiel’s mouth. “When I came here to tell you how I felt, I didn’t do it to make you stay. You know that, right?”

Frowning, Castiel nodded. “Taking that job was the hardest decision I’ve ever made. The last thing I want to do is leave. I’ve gotten used to seeing you all the time. I didn’t think I could bear being away from you anymore. But I’m thirty years old, and I don’t want to be at a dead-end job for the rest of my life. I want us to figure something out. I could drive here, or you could drive there. It doesn’t have to be every weekend, but we could try it out. We can talk on the phone, text, video chat. Whatever it takes. I want this to work for us, Dean.” Castiel leaned his forehead against Dean’s.

“I want it to work, too.” And he did. He absolutely did. “Whatever it takes, as long as I get to be with you. We can do it. I can do long-distance. I don’t mind driving.”

Castiel smiled. “Are we done talking for tonight?”

“Did you have something else in mind?”

“Yes.” Castiel was on his feet, extending his hand. Dean took it, and Castiel led him to the bedroom. Sebastian followed them, but Castiel closed the bedroom door before he could get in. “I think we’ll leave him outside this time.”

Dean walked slowly to the bed, but he didn’t sit down. He’d slept in that bed for days, but all of a sudden, he was a nervous wreck just standing next to it. From behind, Castiel slid his arms around Dean’s middle and kissed the back of Dean’s neck. “I’m going to miss your bed when you’re gone.”

Castiel turned Dean around, wrapping his arms around him again. “We don’t have to think about that tonight.”

“I wish I had asked you out to lunch a long time ago,” Dean said. “I feel like we wasted so much time fighting.”

“I don’t know if you realized that I pushed your buttons only to get you talking. I didn’t care that we were fighting. As long as we talked, it was a good day.”

Unable to say something to rectify the past, Dean kissed Castiel, a soft grace of their lips. It was tentative at first, like they were both still learning how to kiss each other. It was so new, but it felt so right. It didn’t take long for them to pick up the pace. Dean opened up his lips to Castiel, and felt his tongue on the roof of his mouth. The back of Dean’s knees hit the bed, and he fell onto it, bringing Castiel down with him. They laughed, and the sound filled the room.

Castiel kissed Dean’s neck, taking his sweet time and leaving Dean breathless. But then he was gone, and Dean felt cold without the warmth of Castiel’s body on top of him. Dean slipped off his shoes and crawled up on the bed. Castiel was digging through his nightstand until he pulled out a strip of condoms and a bottle of lube.

Dean raised his eyebrows. “You were prepared.”

Castiel blushed, returning to the bed. “I was very hopeful with you. I got them after the first night you stayed here.”

Dean couldn’t help but grin. “If only I had known.”

“Did you ever doubt I wanted you?” Castiel shook his head. “I’ve never wanted anyone more.” Castiel crawled over Dean, bending down to kiss him deeply. Dean worked to remove Castiel’s shirt from him, and once he succeeded, he stared in admiration at his toned body. He had been missing out on so much.

“We should have been doing this a long time ago.”

Castiel laughed quietly, kissing Dean again. Every kiss was another declaration of their feelings. They kissed to make up for missed time. They kissed like they only had tonight to themselves. They kissed like they’d been doing this their entire lives. Dean pulled Castiel down by the hips and kissed his neck until Castiel rocked his hips forward, brushing against Dean. The friction was sending Dean into a spiral.

Dean slipped out of his own shirt, and Castiel unbuttoned his jeans, helping him get rid of them. Then Dean reached for Castiel’s pants and yanked them down, thankful he was wearing loose sweats he could easily slip out of. Dean was impressed with the size of Castiel’s bulge, and he felt proud to have caused it.

They kissed again, rocking against each other, slow rhythmic movements that almost sent Dean over the edge. But then Castiel broke the kiss and trailed open-mouthed kisses down Dean’s chest, all the way to his thigh, where he kissed the inside of it. Dean squirmed under the attention, and held his breath when Castiel removed his boxer briefs. Dean dug his fingers into Castiel’s hair as he went down on him, gasping with every suction.

“Cas, Cas, I want—”

Castiel lifted his head. “What do you want, Dean?”

“I want you inside me.”

Castiel nodded before kneeling between Dean’s open legs and bending down to kiss his lips. Dean could taste himself in Castiel’s mouth, and it sent a thrill through him. Dean moaned when he felt the first lubed finger go in. Castiel continued kissing Dean senseless as he moved his finger. When Castiel bit Dean’s lip, a second finger entered him. Dean groaned this time.

“Are you okay?” Castiel asked.

“Yes,” Dean gasped. “Keep going.” Castiel inserted a third finger. It didn’t take long for Dean to be ready. “I need you now, Cas.”

Castiel’s fingers disappeared, and then he prepared himself. When Castiel settled his weight again on top of Dean, Castiel bent down to press a kiss to Dean’s forehead before he entered him slowly, watching for Dean’s reaction like he was worried Dean would get hurt.

Dean chuckled. “Hey, I’m okay. It’s not my first time doing this, you know.” And then he felt the pressure, which was painful at first, but quickly became nothing but pleasure. Dean wrapped his legs around Castiel’s waist, and his arms around his neck.

Castiel groaned, his forehead falling against Dean’s. “I just want you to feel good.”

“I do. You can move, Cas.”

Then Castiel started to move. They started slow, but picked up the pace when Dean asked Castiel to go faster. Despite how close they were now, Dean still felt they could be closer, so he kissed Castiel. They weren’t really kissing though. They were mostly just clashing their mouths together, gasping for air in between.

“You feel so good,” Castiel said against Dean’s lips.

“Keep going, baby, I’m almost there.” Dean surprised himself with the pet name. He’d never given any of his partners a pet name before. He didn’t even know he liked them. But he found he did.

Every thrust became erratic, which meant that Castiel was close too. Dean felt the pleasure building and building, and then he shouted Castiel’s name as he came all over Castiel’s chest. A few seconds later, Castiel came, biting Dean’s neck as he did. Castiel collapsed on top of Dean, and they stayed like that for a few minutes. By the time Castiel rolled over, Dean felt closer to sleep than consciousness.

Castiel disappeared into the bathroom, and when he returned he had a towel to wipe down some of the come on Dean’s chest. Dean wrapped an arm around Castiel and pulled him close. Castiel laid his head on Dean’s chest, his hand playing with Dean’s hand over his stomach.

“We should have been doing that years ago,” Dean said.

Castiel laughed. “You think I’m that easy?”

“You’re the one who was ready to sleep with me after I slept in your bed one night.”

“Well forgive me, but I’m not made of stone.”

Dean ran his hand through Castiel’s hair. “I’ve always wanted to do this. Your hair drives me crazy sometimes. And your tie. I hate your crooked blue tie. It was so tempting just reaching my hands out to fix it.”

Castiel leaned his head on his elbow. “What else do you hate about me?”

“I hate your gummy smile. It’s the worst. And the wrinkles in your eyes when you laugh. I hate the way you cook because I know I’ll never be as good as you. I hate your soft hands because they’re way too good to be real. I just recently realized that I hate your mouth too. It’s way too dangerous. You gotta lock that thing up.”

Castiel nodded. “I’ll keep that in mind. You should know I also hate many things about you. I hate the way you screamed my name during sex. I hate that Sebastian loves you way too much. I hate that you play air guitar when you listen to classic rock. I hate that you sing along to the songs. And I hate all of the freckles on your face. All thirty-six of them.”

“You counted them?”

“No. Just an educated guess.”

Dean laughed. “Well, I guess we should just keep having a lot of angry, hateful sex from now on. Just until we get it out of our systems.”

“That sounds like a plan.”

Dean turned off the lights, and then moved to lay on his side, facing Castiel. He kissed him softly, just a soft caress of their lips. Dean wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but he fell asleep, tasting Castiel on his lips.

 

 

***

 

 

In the morning, Dean woke up to the sound of his alarm. Another Monday morning. Another week at work. When he turned to look at Castiel, he saw him stirring. He usually didn’t wake up with Dean’s alarm, but this morning he did.

“Hey, Cas, I’m going to my place. I’ll see you later at work.”

Castiel gave him a crooked smile. “Okay.” Then he puckered his lips.

Dean bent down to kiss him. “Good morning.”

“’Morning.”

After getting dressed, Dean made the walk back to his house. He instantly regretted not having driven his car, but it was too late for that now.

When he walked into his house, he was surprised to find his entire family wide awake, making breakfast and watching the morning news.

“What the hell are y’all doing up at this time?” Dean asked.

“We’re having breakfast,” his mom said. “You know, like a family.”

“You were gone all night,” Jess pointed out. “I’m guessing things went well with Castiel.”

“Judging by the hickeys on his neck, I’d say things went _really_ well,” Sam said, sipping his orange juice.

Dean hadn’t seen himself in a mirror so he didn’t know how noticeable the marks on his neck were, but if they could see them from the dinner table then they were probably very noticeable. “I’m just gonna go get ready for work. I’ll fill you in later, alright?”

“You better come have breakfast with us before leaving,” his mom called.

Dean got ready in a flash. Upon finding a mirror, he saw two hickeys on his neck. They were mostly covered by the neck of his button-up shirt, so he figured he wouldn’t have to worry about them at work. Not that he interacted with many people who weren’t Castiel at work.

At breakfast, his family demanded details about what had happened after Dean went to talk to Castiel. Dean told them as much as he could without getting into the gory details.

“So you’re going to try a long-distance relationship?” Sam asked, frowning.

“Yeah. I think it’ll work. We both want this.”

“Are you sure? I mean, you’ve just started dating, and you want to be long-distance? That can’t be easy, Dean. Have you thought about it, or was it just a hasty decision you made to make him happy?”

Dean chewed on his bacon. “Relax, Sammy. I know what I’m doing. Cas didn’t make me do this. I want to do it. I want to be with him, even if it takes me four hours to visit him.”

“How long are you willing to do this?” Sam asked.

Dean shrugged. “However long it takes.”

“However long it takes…for what? For him to come back? For you to move there?”

“I don’t know, Sam. I don’t know yet. We haven’t figured out all the details.”

Sam sighed. “I’m sorry, Dean, but I just don’t think this is a good idea.”

“You heard your brother, Sam,” their mom said. “He made his decision. We have to support him.”

“I think it’s really sweet,” Jess said. “I think you and Castiel work well together. I’m glad you worked things out.”

Dean smiled at her. “Thanks, Jess. I should head out now, or I’ll be late for work.”

The entire drive to work, Dean thought about what Sam had said. He was worried about Dean, but he didn’t know the full extent of the situation. Sam didn’t know how much Dean and Castiel wanted this to work. Why did should they keep themselves from having this when they both wanted it so much? The gnawing thought Dean couldn’t shake was the one that kept asking _how long?_ How long would they do this? How long could he and Castiel only see each other once a week, if they were lucky? How long could they keep it up?

Dean decided to stuff those concerns deep down in his brain. He parked his Impala next to Castiel’s Prius and made the walk up the stairs to his floor. When he made it to his desk, he noticed Castiel wasn’t there, even though his car had been in the parking lot.

Dean searched the floor, but he couldn’t find him anywhere. He stepped into the breakroom where a few people were pouring coffee into their mugs, but there was no Castiel. When Dean headed back to his desk, he ran into Castiel, who had just walked out of Crowley’s office.

“Hey,” Dean said.

“Hello, Dean.” Castiel grinned. “Were you making coffee? I could use one.”

“No, I was…looking for you.”

They were back at their desks. They sat and rolled their chairs so they were facing each other.

“I had to talk to Crowley,” Castiel said. “I told him I was leaving, so these are my last two weeks. I also told him about us.”

“You did?”

“Yes, but I only did it because he asked me if the rumors were true. I told him that they weren’t true, up until yesterday.”

“What did he say?”

“He said I’m leaving, so he didn’t care.”

“Huh. He took that surprisingly well.”

Castiel nodded. “I agree. Not sure why he’s being so pleasant all of a sudden.”

“Let’s just hope it stays that way.”

Castiel stared at Dean for a few seconds, and then his eyes widened. “I left hickeys all over your neck.”

Dean chuckled. “I know. My family saw them this morning, so thanks for that.”

“I got a bit carried away last night.”

“If anyone asks, I’ll just tell them I’m dating a vampire.”

Castiel rolled his eyes.

They got to work, but about ten minutes later, Dean spotted Aaron approaching them. He stopped behind Castiel, placing his hands stiffly on Castiel’s shoulders. Castiel shot him one of his deadly glares, but Aaron didn’t take the hint and kept his hands there.

“Hey, Castiel,” Aaron said.

Castiel shrugged until Aaron removed his hands. “What?”

“I know we got off on the wrong foot, mostly because I kissed your boyfriend and everything—”

“Dean wasn’t my boyfriend at the time,” Castiel corrected.

“Not like it mattered,” Aaron said. “He still acted like he was. Anyway, I’m here because I heard you’re leaving us.”

“When did you hear that?” Dean asked. “Cas _just_ told Crowley.”

“News travel fast around here,” Aaron said. “So a few of us wanted to buy you a few beers down at the Roadhouse tonight, to say goodbye. You’re invited, too, Dean.”

Castiel looked at Dean, confusion written all over his face. Then he looked back up at Aaron. “Why?”

“Because you’re our coworker!” Aaron said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “We just want to say goodbye. Come on, it’ll be fun.”

Castiel sighed. “Sure.”

“Sweet.” Aaron clapped Castiel’s shoulder before he walked away.

“What the hell was that?” Dean asked.

“Don’t ask me. You’re the one who socializes with the people here. As far as I know, they all hate me.”

In hindsight, Dean realized how absurd it was to think that every single person in their office hated Castiel. Most of them didn’t know him. Not even Bela and her friends knew him well enough to form a real opinion on him. Even Dean, who worked right next to him for three years, really didn’t know Castiel until a couple of months ago.

“No one could hate you,” Dean said.

“Dean, I don’t care if people hate me. You’re the only person I didn’t want to hate me. Everyone else can hate me as much as they want.”

“But they don’t. They want to say goodbye to you because they care about you.”

“They do not.”

“You’ve been here longer than me. They do care.”

Castiel didn’t look convinced. “You’re coming with me, right?”

“Of course. And I’ll kick some ass if I have to.”

“We should probably stop talking and get to work.”

“Are you scared you’ll get fired?”

“I’m scared _you’ll_ get fired.”

Dean sighed, getting back to work. A few minutes later, Castiel got up from his desk. He came back with two mugs full of coffee from the break room. After putting Dean’s mug on his desk, Castiel kissed Dean’s cheek and went back to work.

Dean was in the middle of a call, or he would have said something in return. But he looked at Castiel and smiled. He already knew he would miss the hell out of him.


	13. Chapter 13

When they made it to the Roadhouse after work, Dean was immediately taken aback by the amount of people who showed up from their office. More than half of the patrons were their coworkers. Dean hadn’t spoken to most of them, though he recognized their faces. It was hard not to, after all those years.

As they approached the bar, Dean’s hand on the small of Castiel’s back, he caught sight of Lisa. Now Dean definitely hadn’t spoken to Lisa in years. Nothing more than a few words in passing here and there, just to not make things awkward. Just as he was wondering if her presence would be awkward, he saw Pamela, another one of his flings. And then there they were, Cassie and Tessa, sitting right next to each other. All Dean needed for the set to be complete was—oh, right there, Dean spotted Daniel, his last office hookup before his long dry spell. Dean debated whether he should run out the door now, or within five minutes. Either way, he knew he would not stick around.

“Dean, you look like you just saw a ghost,” Castiel said, stopping him from taking another step, and then taking one of Dean’s hands in his. “Talk to me. What’s wrong?”

Dean shifted on his feet. “Look, Cas, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, but everyone I’ve slept with in the office is here. All of them. And now you’re here, and we’re—you know—and I think it might be better if I go home.”

Castiel furrowed his eyebrows. “I think you’re overreacting. I don’t care about who you’ve slept with. I don’t care if you slept with the entire building. I still want you here. With me. Don’t go, okay?”

Dean sighed, finding himself leaning closer to Castiel. Dean loved it when Castiel said the right thing. Dean loved it when Castiel made him feel like everything was alright with the world. Dean loved Castiel, and that was reason enough to stay. “Okay. I’ll stick around, baby.”

Castiel smiled, leaning up to peck Dean’s lips. When he pulled back, Castiel looked a bit sheepish. “Actually, I also slept with Lisa.”

“You did what?” Dean widened his eyes. The shock hit him hard, and then he was full of questions. When? Why? How many times? Was it more than casual? But Dean didn’t get a chance to voice them because Castiel was already explaining.

“It was after you were moved to my area. Lisa and I sort of hit it off, but what we had was nothing serious. Just a few nights. She told me she slept with you before, and I told her she’d been very lucky. Lisa just laughed and said that I shouldn’t get my hopes up with you because, well, she didn’t think you’d ever want anything serious. I didn’t bother telling her that you hated my guts, anyway.”

Dean shook his head. The thought of Castiel with anyone made him feel queasy, but picturing him with Lisa? That was on another level. The thing that really got to him, though, was that Castiel had never allowed himself to believe he could have a chance with Dean. He squeezed Castiel’s hand. “Cas, I had no idea.”

“I’m only telling you this so you can stop worrying about the people here tonight. It doesn’t matter. I don’t care about anyone here but you, and I know you’re mine, so I’m happy.”

Dean wrapped his arms around Castiel’s waist, drawing him closer. Before he could press their lips together, he heard a loud, “Hey guys! The party’s over here. Stop with the PDA already.” It occurred to Dean that this thing—relationship? Whoa, okay, yeah—with Castiel was so new. He still hadn’t been a _couple_ with him anywhere. This was their first night out together as more than friends. They hadn’t even been on an official date yet.

Castiel sighed, reluctantly walking towards the group, taking Dean by the hand.

Aaron offered them two beers. “Drink up!”

“This is a lot of people,” Castiel told him, looking around the room.

“Yeah, well they’re all here for you, buddy,” Aaron said, clinking his beer against Castiel’s. “Wait until you see the cake. It’s on a table over there.”

Castiel widened his eyes. “There’s a cake?”

“Of course there’s a cake!” Aaron led them both to a booth table in the corner. There were a few people he’d seen around at the office sitting at the table. They greeted each other.

When Dean looked at the cake, he couldn’t help but laugh. A very old picture of Castiel that must have been taken during an office Christmas party was on the cake. Castiel looked like he wanted to kill whoever was taking the picture. He was wearing a Santa hat and an ugly Christmas sweater. Dean laughed even harder when he remembered the year the picture had been taken. It had been the same year Dean moved next to Castiel’s cubicle. Dean loved poking the tiger, so he’d grabbed a Santa hat from Toby and put it on Castiel. He didn’t realize someone had taken a picture of him, but he was glad they did.

There was writing on the cake as well: We will miss you, Castiel!

“I love that picture,” Dean said.

Castiel snorted. “You put that hat on me. And Randy took a picture of me. I wasn’t sure which one of you I detested the most in that moment.”

“It’s chocolate and vanilla,” Aaron said.

“You really didn’t have to do this,” Castiel said.

“I didn’t really do much besides organize it,” Aaron said, smiling. “Look, if I’m being honest, I’m not just doing this for you.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Of course not.”

“It’s not because of you either, Dean,” Aaron said, impatiently. “I’m still the new guy, you know. I’m trying to get myself known around the office. I figured this was a good start. But I still think you’re a great guy, Castiel. I can see why Dean chose you. I mean, not that I was ever an option, right? Dean didn’t even close his eyes when we kissed.”

Castiel raised his eyebrows.

“Sorry, I’ll shut up now.”

“Okay, I think we’re going to go grab a seat,” Dean said, his hand back on the small of Castiel’s back as they walked to the two empty stools at the bar. Dean took a long swig of his beer. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “Sorry about Aaron.”

“Dean, I don’t care about Aaron.”

Dean opened his mouth to say something else, but his sour mood was quickly improved at the sight of Charlie and Jo approaching them. He almost sank into Charlie’s arms when she came up to hug him. “I’ve never been happier to see you.”

Charlie laughed. “Okay, weirdo. We ran into traffic, or we would have been here sooner.”

Jo smiled. “Yeah, traffic.”

Castiel hugged Jo tightly. “I’m going to miss you very much. I hope you know that.”

“What, it’s not like you’re getting rid of me,” Jo said. “I’m coming to visit you as much as Dean, if not more.”

“Babe, I don’t know if Castiel wants us to bother him so much,” Charlie said.

“Bother me?” Castiel said. “You could never bother me.”

“When do you leave, anyway?” Jo asked.

Castiel looked thoughtful. “I was planning to drive down to Pratt this weekend to look for apartments. My first classes will start in June, so I still have about a month to get everything ready over there. I guess it all depends on how soon I can move.”

Dean swallowed, his throat feeling dry. He sipped his beer again. It would be soon. Dean had only found out about all of this yesterday. He still hadn’t really finished processing it. Just when he was brave enough to tell Castiel his feelings, Castiel decided to leave. No, that wasn’t how it happened. Castiel had decided to leave before Dean told him anything. Dean hadn’t been a factor in his decision.

“Let me know if you need help moving all your stuff,” Jo said. “I have a pickup.”

Castiel grinned. “Thank you for the offer, Jo. I’ll consider it. My brother is officially on moving duty, but I will let you know if we need extra hands.”

“Wait, Gabe’s helping you move?” Dean asked.

Castiel nodded. “He was the first person I told about the move. He offered right away.”

“I can help, too,” Dean said. “I’ll carry all your crap.”

“How chivalrous of you,” Castiel said, nudging Dean’s ribs.

“We’re going to get our drinks,” Charlie said, wrapping an arm around Jo’s. “We’ll be right back.”

Dean was about to settle back on his stool when he heard his name called. When he looked up, he made eye contact with Lisa. The Lisa that started it all. “Lisa. Hi. How are you?”

Lisa pulled Dean into her arms. “I’m doing really good, Dean.” Then she turned to Castiel and hugged him, too. “I can’t believe you’re leaving us, Cas.”

Dean felt a pang of jealousy hearing Lisa using Castiel’s nickname. Castiel didn’t allow very many people to use it, but he didn’t even flinch when Lisa did it. But it was normal, after all. They had history. Dean still couldn’t believe it.

“I know,” Castiel said, smiling at her. “I’m going to miss you. How’s Ben doing?”

Ben was Lisa’s ten-year-old son. Dean had never met him, but Lisa talked about him a lot at the office. It was really sweet.

“He’s doing great,” Lisa said. “We started doing yoga together. He hated it at first, but now he’s really into it. I had to get him into it early. You know how it is.”

“Oh yes,” Castiel said. “I remember our yoga sessions together. If I’d started when I was younger I probably would be more flexible.”

“I think you’re very flexible, Cas.”

Dean laughed, an odd high-pitched laughter he didn’t recognize as his own. “This isn’t weird at all.”

Lisa turned to Dean. “Look, I know it might be a bit weird considering my history with both of you, but it’s all in the past now. I’m so glad you found your way to each other. You make a beautiful couple, seriously.”

Castiel looked touched. “Thank you for saying that, Lisa.”

Lisa lifted her left hand, showing the flashy ring on her finger. “I’m actually engaged to a wonderful man.”

“What?” Dean asked, reaching for her hand. “Let me see.”

“Congratulations,” Castiel said. “I hope he makes you happy.”

“He does,” Lisa said. “And Ben adores him. It’s all I could ask for.”

They talked a bit more before Lisa went back to her group. Dean wasn’t sure why, but seeing her so happy gave him a sense of closure. All this time, Dean had lived knowing how great of a person Lisa was, but despite their night together all those years back, Dean hadn’t pursued more. Dean hadn’t had a clue what he wanted three years ago. Dean was younger and naïve and when he saw a pretty face he thought of someone he could sleep with, not spend the rest of his life with. So Lisa hadn’t been important in his life because Dean had wanted it that way.

“She was the only friend I had in the office for a long time,” Castiel said, sipping his beer. “I’m glad to see her so excited about her future.”

“Yeah, she’s a good one. She deserves it.”

Charlie and Jo returned, holding half empty cocktails. They went to sit at an empty table and talked for a while. More like, Dean and Charlie caught up on the TV shows they’d been watching and Jo and Castiel talked about the interesting articles they’d read recently. Dean kept his hand on Castiel’s thigh under the table, feeling comfort in his warmth and solidness. Every time Dean turned to look at him and Castiel faced him with a soft smile, Dean was reminded that he was so lucky to be here with him, to have him by his side. Dean had to keep reminding himself that being with Castiel wasn’t a one-time thing. It was a very permanent thing. At least, that was what Dean hoped for.

“It’s time to cut the cake!” Aaron announced, and people cheered in the room. For this particular event, Aaron made Castiel get up and join him. Castiel did, rolling his eyes all the while. Aaron made Castiel cut the cake, and Castiel cut right down the middle of the picture on the cake. Then Aaron took over, handing out the pieces of cake in paper plates for everyone.

Castiel returned to the table with two pieces of cake, handing the chocolate one to Dean and keeping the vanilla to himself. Aaron delivered two other pieces to Charlie and Jo. The cake was better than Dean had expected, and he kept stealing bites from Castiel’s.

After a lot of protesting from Castiel, Dean held up his fork with a piece of his chocolate cake. “Here, try mine.” Castiel opened his mouth and Dean fed him the cake. “It’s good, huh?”

Castiel chewed slowly. “Yeah, but mine is better.”

“Keep telling yourself that, sweetheart.”

“Is that your new pet name for me?”

Dean smiled. “I don’t know. Do you like it?”

“No.”

Dean laughed. “Okay, I take it back then.”

Castiel held up a forkful of his cake for Dean, and Dean opened his mouth to it. Then Castiel wiped a thumb on the corner of Dean’s mouth to remove a few crumbs.

“Wow, you two are gross,” Charlie said, her fork halfway to her lips. “How long have you been together? Oh yeah, _one day_. Quit feeding each other. There are people here.”

Jo chuckled. “They’re sweet. Leave them alone.”

“We’re about to get grosser,” Dean said, grabbing Castiel’s face in his hands and kissing him deeply. The kiss was more for show than anything else, but Castiel dug his fingers into Dean’s hair, pulling him even closer. When they pulled away, Dean pressed his lips to Castiel’s temple.

Charlie was chewing on her food, frowning. “Disgusting.”

“That’s homophobic,” Dean said.

Charlie tossed her fork at him. “I’m gay.”

Dean caught the fork before it hit him and then threw it back at her. “That could have poked my eye, asshole.”

“Good. You don’t need two eyes.”

Jo pinched the bridge of her nose. “I swear, sometimes they forget they’re not children.”

“I think they choose to ignore that fact,” Castiel said.

“I’m watching you,” Dean said, narrowing his eyes at Charlie.

Charlie spread out her arms. “I’m not scared. Do I look scared to you?”

Castiel continued eating his cake and talking to Jo, while Dean played a very intense staring game with Charlie.

Before long, people started leaving, a few them stopping to say their goodbyes to Castiel, many of which Dean doubted Castiel had ever spoken to before. The cake was almost all gone, and Aaron insisted that Castiel take the rest of it home. The only part of the cake left showed the Santa hat that Castiel had hated so much.

“Really, I think _you_ should take it home,” Castiel said to Aaron. “It’s too much cake for me. I’ve had enough for the night, I think.”

“Alright, if you’re sure,” Aaron said, shrugging.

They said goodbye to Charlie and Jo at the parking lot, Dean making a sign to show he was still watching Charlie, and Charlie trying not to laugh as she made it in return. Dean walked Castiel to his Prius, which was parked next to Dean’s Impala. It was a bit silly that they’d driven in different cars, but they both knew that they had to go their separate ways tonight. Dean hadn’t spent many nights home, and now that his family was visiting, he felt guilty about leaving them there all alone. Dean wasn’t happy about it, but Castiel agreed it was good for him to spend time with his family.

“Did you have a good time tonight?” Dean asked as Castiel leaned against the door of his car. Dean moved closer, his legs open so that Castiel’s legs fell in between. Dean placed his hands on Castiel’s hips, his thumbs rubbing the soft skin beneath his shirt.

“I did,” Castiel said, his hands on Dean’s chest traveling up until they wrapped around his neck. “My bed will be very cold tonight.”

Dean nearly whimpered at that. “Come home with me.”

Castiel pressed an open-mouthed kiss on Dean’s throat. “Not tonight.”

“Tomorrow?”

“Gabriel planned a dinner for me tomorrow. You could come. I know he’s been wanting to see you again since that night you met.”

Dean sighed. “I don’t think your brother likes me very much.”

“I don’t care if my brother likes you. I like you enough for the both of us.” Castiel trailed kisses down Dean’s neck. Dean stepped closer, tightening his hold on Castiel’s hips.

“Are you sure I’m invited? I don’t want to intrude.”

“You’re always invited. From now on, Dean, you’re invited to everything as long as I’m concerned.”

Dean smiled, and then he stifled a groan when Castiel bit into his neck. “Easy there, vampire.”

“Maybe I can find other, more discrete areas to leave my marks,” Castiel whispered.

Dean swallowed right when Castiel kissed his throat again. “That would be interesting.”

“Hmm.” Castiel continued kissing a path down Dean’s neck like it was his favorite pastime. It was making it harder for Dean to say goodbye for the night.

“I want you to have dinner with my family, too,” Dean said. “While my mom’s in town. She leaves soon. I know you didn’t get a chance to really talk.”

Castiel pulled away, looking Dean in the eyes. “You want to introduce me to your family as your…”

“What would you like me to call you?” Dean asked.

“Boyfriend, partner, significant other,” Castiel said. “It doesn’t matter.”

Dean grinned. “Boyfriend. I’ve never had one of those before.”

Castiel raised his eyebrows. “Really?”

“Yeah. I’ve dated men before, but I never called them my boyfriends. You’d be the first.”

Castiel nodded. “Boyfriend it is.”

“Will you come to dinner this week to meet my family as my boyfriend then?”

Castiel kissed the corner of Dean’s mouth. “I’d love to.”

Dean kissed Castiel for a long time before he heard the clearing of a throat that made him pull away. Aaron was standing there, holding the leftover cake in his hands.

“Get a room,” Aaron mumbled, walking past them to his car.

Dean bent down to continue kissing Castiel, but Castiel placed two fingers over Dean’s lips, stopping him.

“It’s late, Dean. I should go. If you start kissing me again, I’m afraid we’ll never stop.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Dean asked.

Castiel chuckled. “Yes. We need to get home and sleep.”

“Not together,” Dean reminded him, frowning.

“Not together,” Castiel agreed, just as disappointed.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Castiel picked up one of Dean’s hands still on his hip, and kissed the back of it. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”


	14. Chapter 14

Dean ran into Kevin, who was walking out of the breakroom. They smiled awkwardly at each other for a few seconds before Kevin broke the silence.

“Hey, Dean, it’s been a while.” He studied the floor like it was absolutely fascinating.

“Yeah, I know,” Dean said, rubbing the back of his neck. “But hey, no hard feelings.”

Kevin looked up at him. “I’m really sorry about all we said about Castiel. We didn’t really know him. We don’t know him. But I’m sure he’s great. We heard you were sort of a thing now.”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, we are. We are.”

“Great. That’s great. So, I’ll just go back to my desk now.”

“Alright, see you later, man.”

“Okay.”

Dean shook his head, pushing the door to the breakroom. He grabbed a mug, grateful that there was already freshly made coffee. Just as he was filling up his cup, Dean felt a familiar body pressed up behind him, arms wrapping around his waist.

“Morning, sunshine,” Dean mumbled, setting down the coffee pot and sipping his coffee.

“I missed you,” Castiel said, pressing a trail of warm kisses on the back of Dean’s neck. “I got so used to sleeping with you that I had to hug my pillow all night.”

Dean laughed, turning around in his arms. Castiel’s hair was completely ruffled and his blue tie was crooked. Dean fixed the tie for him, feeling giddy because he could do this now. “I couldn’t sleep more than four hours without you. It’s a problem.”

Castiel pressed a soft kiss to Dean’s lips. “It is.” Another kiss. “Why do we have to go to work today? I’d rather be doing other things.”

“Me?” Dean asked, raising an eyebrow.

Castiel kissed the corner of Dean’s lips. “You.”

“Well, my bed is open for business any time you like.”

Castiel smirked. “Are you propositioning me?”

“Are you willing to be propositioned?”

“Oh, yeah. Big time.”

“Sweet. When?”

“This weekend.”

Dean frowned. “That’s three days away.”

“Your family is in town and you need to be with them,” Castiel reminded him.

Dean sighed, rubbing his forehead. Yeah, yeah, he knew he was supposed to be a good host to his family. But Castiel was leaving soon, too. “We’re having dinner with Gabe tonight, aren’t we?”

Castiel let go of Dean, his hands lingering until they were completely off of him. Then he went to pour himself a mug of coffee. “Yes. We’re meeting at the Olive Garden near our places. Around 7. Is that okay?”

“Yeah, that’s okay. Does Gabe know I’m tagging along?”

Castiel smiled. “Of course he knows. He’s happy to see you again.”

“Did he say that, or are you paraphrasing?”

“Dean, my brother likes you. You have nothing to worry about.”

Dean sighed. “If you say so.”

“We should get to work.” Castiel started walking and Dean couldn’t help but check out his ass. It looked good in those gray slacks. Castiel looked over his shoulder and laughed. “I knew you were looking at my ass.”

“Well, it’s a nice ass.”

 

 

***

 

 

Before meeting Castiel and Gabriel for dinner, Dean went home to his family. They were in the backyard, drinking all of Dean’s beer. He made a mental note to pick up some more. Sam and Jess were on the hammock Dean had recently put up, and his mom was on the swing.

Dean sat next to his mom. “Isn’t it a bit too hot to be out here?”

“It’s a nice day,” Sam said. “Jess and I bought a few groceries. We’re thinking about going swimming tomorrow.”

“Oh yeah? You want to show off your speedo?” Dean asked, already laughing.

Sam rolled his eyes. “You always bring that up. Dean, just because I had one in my shopping cart doesn’t mean I would have ever bought it.”

“But you thought about it, and that’s enough for me to tease you endlessly.” Dean smiled.

“Whatever, jerk.”

Dean’s mom shook her head. “You boys.”

“I think you’d look cute in a speedo,” Jess said.

“Thanks,” Sam said, kissing her cheek.

Dean cleared his throat. “Hey, so tonight I’m going to dinner with Cas and his brother Gabe. I was thinking maybe tomorrow Cas could come to dinner here.”

“That sounds great,” his mom said. “I’d love to talk to him some more. He’s a smart one, that boy. I like him.”

Dean smiled. He hadn’t realized how much he’d wanted his mom’s approval until now. “I’m glad you like him. He’s, you know, he’s important to me.”

“Oh, I think we know,” she said.

Dean looked at Sam and Jess. “Are you guys okay with Cas coming over for dinner?”

“It’s your house, Dean,” Sam said.

“Dude, no, come on,” Dean said. “It’s never just been _my_ house. Sure, I bought the damn thing, but I bought it for us. All of us. I wanted a place for you to call home, kid. So, I want you to be okay with this.”

Sam shrugged. “Cas doesn’t bother me. I just don’t think it’s the best idea to start this long-distance relationship with him. But it’s your life, Dean. You can do whatever you want.”

Dean sighed. He’d been hoping they’d moved past that, but apparently, they still hadn’t.

“I’m really excited to get to know him better,” Jess said. “I think he’s nice and cute, and I could tell he cares about you just from the little I saw of him.”

“Thank you for saying that, Jess,” Dean said. Dean had always liked her.

Sam rolled his eyes. “I also saw the way he looked at you. He’s obviously into you. Besides, didn’t you two spend like every waking moment together?”

“And un-waking,” Dean muttered, thinking back on all the nights they spent snuggled up against each other. Dean had gotten so used to Castiel’s warmth at night. Maybe it was better he trained his brain that Castiel wouldn’t be in his bed that much anymore. Not when he’d be two hundred and forty miles away.

His mom nudged his side. “Look at you. You’re so smitten. I’ve never seen you this way about anyone you’ve ever dated.”

Dean rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, it’s different with Cas. I mean, I told him I loved him. Because I do. I love him. I don’t think I’ve ever said that to anyone else I’ve been with.”

Sam raised his eyebrows. “That’s a big step for you.”

“Yeah,” Dean huffed. “I guess it is.”

 

 

***

 

 

When Dean got to Olive Garden, Gabriel and Castiel were already seated at a table. Dean kissed Castiel on the lips and bent to shake Gabriel’s hand, feeling more than slightly awkward to see him again.

Dean had dressed up a little, wearing a nice green shirt that he knew Castiel liked and a black blazer. He wasn’t sure if he’d made up this dinner to be more than it was, but at least he would look sharp while being there.

“I was starting to think I’d never see you again, Dean,” Gabriel said, wagging his eyebrows. “Have you been hiding from me?”

“Uh, no,” Dean said, narrowing his eyes.

“Dean’s family is in town, so he’s been spending some time with them,” Castiel said.

Gabriel looked at Dean for a long time. “What are your intentions with my baby bro, Dean? Be honest with me.”

“Gabriel, please.” Castiel rolled his eyes. “Dean, he’s not serious.”

“Of course I’m serious,” Gabriel said. “I want to know if he’s just in this short term or if he’s planning to stick around for the long haul. You’re about to move to a brand-new town, far away from here. Is it really worth it to commit yourself to him when you could have someone else nearby? Think about it, Cassie.”

Castiel glared at Gabriel. That glare that Dean had gotten so used to over the years. “Gabriel, you have absolutely no right to butt into my love life. If you must know, my relationship with Dean is serious. I don’t want anyone else.”

The waiter—thank goodness—chose that moment to take their drink orders. Dean ordered a red wine because he’d need alcohol to get through the evening. Once the waiter was gone, Dean broke the silence.

“Listen, Gabe, I know you don’t know me well,” Dean said.

“I don’t know you at all,” Gabriel said.

“Right,” Dean said. “But I’m here now, and I can tell you anything you need to know. If you’d like, I can start by telling you that I am crazy about your brother.”

Castiel smiled at Dean, and then blushed before he looked away. It was endearing. Dean was dying to kiss him.

The waiter returned with their drinks and took their food orders before leaving again. Dean took an eager sip of his wine.

Gabriel seemed satisfied with that. “Alright, Mister. Let’s play a rapid-fire game. You can’t take more than five seconds to answer. Got it?”

Dean nodded. “Bring it on.”

“Cats or dogs?”

“Cats,” Dean said, smirking. Oh, he could do this easy.

“Drive or fly?”

“Drive.”

“Horror or comedy?”

“Horror.”

“Sweet or sour?”

“Sweet.”

Gabriel smiled a little bit. “Kids or no kids?”

Dean paused at that, shooting Castiel a glance. Castiel’s face was blank, simply waiting for Dean to answer. Dean went with his guts. “Kids.”

Gabriel hummed. “Men or women?”

“Both,” Dean said, shrugging. “I’m bi. Don’t ask me to choose.”

“I respect that.”

Dean let out a breath of relief. “Is that it?”

Gabriel sipped his iced tea. “For now it is.” Then he turned to Castiel. “Cassie, I think I kinda like him.”

“Good. Now leave him alone. You’ve tortured him enough.” Castiel smiled apologetically at Dean. “I’ll make it up to you.”

Dean winked. “Sounds good, baby.”

“Okay, you’re going to have to stop that,” Gabriel said. “We’re in public.”

The rest of the dinner went by smoothly. Gabriel seemed more relaxed, which made Dean feel more at ease. Conversation was easy between them. Gabriel and Castiel joked around as much as Dean and Sam did. And they always included Dean in the conversation, even though most of it had to do with their childhood stories. Dean learned that Castiel fell off his bike at least a hundred times before he learned how to ride it. And apparently, Michael taught both of them to drive, even though Gabriel had already driven their dad’s car to the store before he knew how to drive. Dean told them how his mom had taught him how to drive and how he’d taught Sam but they both still sucked at parallel parking.

The best part of the evening was when Gabriel told Dean that Castiel used to have a pet turtle named Buddy when he was seven, and he talked and sang to him all the time. Dean cried from laughing so hard. Castiel promised to kick Gabriel’s ass as soon as he had the chance, but Gabriel promised Dean he’d show him pictures of Castiel and Buddy because there were a lot. By the end of the night, Dean really liked Gabriel.

After paying for dinner, they walked out to the parking lot. Dean was about to say goodbye to Castiel when Castiel grabbed his hand.

“I rode here with Gabriel,” Castiel said. “Do you mind taking me home?”

Dean knew it was stupid, but his heart beat excitedly over this request. Castiel was ready to be inside the Impala. “Yeah, yeah, I can do that.”

Castiel squeezed his hand. “Great.” Then he looked at Gabriel. “I’ll see you later?”

“You know it,” Gabriel said. “Be good tonight, kiddos. And Dean, I want to see more of you. Not just ‘cause you have a good-looking face.”

“I’m sure you’ll see a lot more of me,” Dean said. They watched Gabriel reach his car, climb inside, and drive away before Dean had the courage to look at Castiel. “How did I do?”

“What do you mean?”

“How did I do? I know this was some sort of test, right? To see if your brother liked me?”

Castiel laughed. “What are you talking about? This wasn’t a test, Dean. It was dinner with my brother.”

“Okay, fine, whatever you say. How did I do? Do you think he really likes me?”

Castiel cupped Dean’s face. “Yes. He does. You’re charming and kind and gorgeous. Gabriel loves you. He’s never been this interested in anyone I’ve been with. He usually just tells me to be careful, but he stays far away from them. But he was always interested in you. Even when we were just friends. Maybe he always knew.”

“Knew what? That I’d be crazy about you?”

Castiel laughed again. He was radiating from happiness, and Dean felt a swell of pride when he realized it was because of him. “You’re crazy about me, are you?”

“As crazy as you were about Buddy,” Dean said, grinning. “I even sang a song for you like you did for little Buddy!”

Castiel groaned, dropping his hands and walking away. “We’re not talking about my turtle.”

Dean laughed, catching up to Castiel. “Tell me more about Buddy.”

“No. You’ll just make fun of me.”

“I won’t. I promise. I just want to know more about you.”

Castiel stopped walking and turned to face Dean. He sighed. “Buddy was my best friend when I was seven. I had a hard time making friends with other kids at school. There was this girl, Ava, who would always bully me. When I told my dad that a girl was bullying me, he just told me to man up. It didn’t help, of course. So I stopped talking to all the kids in my class, and instead, just talked to Buddy. And that’s it. That’s the full story. I was a lonely kid with no friends so I talked to my turtle.”

Dean could do nothing but take Castiel in his arms. He felt special, somehow, at knowing this story. He got the feeling that Castiel didn’t just share this with anyone. Dean pressed kisses to the top of Castiel’s head. When he pulled away, Dean asked, “Is this why you don’t talk to people at the office?”

“I don’t like to open up to people,” Castiel admitted. “The few friends I have now I only made because I felt comfortable enough to give them a chance. I don’t usually do that.”

“Why?”

“It’s easier that way.”

Dean nodded. “I can understand that.” He licked his lips. “People who don’t take the time to know you are missing out. I don’t know if you know this, but you are my favorite person.”

“And you’re mine,” Castiel said, without missing a beat.

Dean hugged him again.

 

 

***

 

 

Having Castiel in the passenger seat of the Impala was like a dream come true. Dean couldn’t believe it. He was sitting behind the wheel, still in the parking lot, staring at Castiel, wondering if he would disappear with the blink of an eye.

“Stop looking at me like I’m going to disappear,” Castiel said, as if he’d read his mind.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” Dean said, grinning. “How do you feel? Are you sure about this? You can change your mind.”

Castiel reached out his hand and Dean grabbed it. “Dean, I’m sure about this. I’ve given this a lot of thought. And I trust you. Completely. You wouldn’t let anything happen to me.”

“Can I just tell you how awesome you are?”

“I know.”

“I’m a great driver.”

“I know that, too.”

“If you want me to stop, just say so.”

“Dean, this isn’t sex.”

“I just want to make sure you feel safe.”

“I do. I’m with you.”

Dean felt that in his gut. He was beaming. Dean let go of Castiel’s hand, just to be extra careful, and buckled his seatbelt. “Okay, here we go.”

It took Dean longer to pull out of the parking lot than usual, but he was measuring Castiel’s reactions. Castiel looked happy and relaxed, which gave Dean the courage to drive at a normal pace. Castiel’s apartment was about ten minutes away, so Dean knew it wasn’t really a big deal. But then again, it _was_ a big deal. Castiel was facing one of his fears with Dean. It was important.

Since the weather was nice, Dean rolled down his windows and turned up the Ramones on the stereo. He looked at Castiel and he let out a small gasp when he saw the way the wind blew at his long hair. Dean had wanted this image, he’d even dreamt it once before. Dean realized how much this meant to him. He wondered if Castiel knew this. _Was that what made him do this?_

After a couple of minutes, Dean felt comfortable enough to put his hand on Castiel’s knee, just to feel him there. Castiel gave him a toothy grin, one of Dean’s favorites. His hair was out of control, and Dean loved it.

“Hey, I have an idea,” Castiel said, locking eyes with Dean for a brief second.

“Yeah? What is it?”

“Let’s get some ice cream.”

“Aren’t you lactose intolerant?”

Castiel laughed. “I can have some ice cream, Dean. Nice of you to remember, though.”

“Are you sure? Because I’d love some ice cream.”

“Yes. Let’s get some ice cream.”

“Alright, let’s go.”

They got to the ice cream place, and ordered their ice cream in cones. Castiel got pistachio and Dean got double chocolate chip with sprinkles. They ate them in the car, listening to the old Ramones tape that Dean had listened to hundreds of times before.

“Let me try yours,” Dean said. Castiel tilted it in his direction and Dean licked it. He made a face. “This is gross. Why didn’t you get any toppings?”

“I didn’t want any. Then it’s too sweet.”

“What’s wrong with too sweet?”

“I don’t like sweet things.”

“Try mine, then,” Dean said, offering his own.

Castiel licked it. “I don’t like it. Too sweet.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “It’s chocolate, Cas. What did you expect?”

“Maybe I don’t like chocolate.”

Dean gasped, a hand on his heart. “I don’t think I heard you correctly. Did you just say you don’t like chocolate?”

Castiel smirked. “Yes. I believe that’s what I said.”

“That’s it. This is over. We’re done. I’m not dating someone who hates chocolate. Sorry. It’s been fun.”

“I’m sad it had to end this way. I was just about to suggest we make out, but since this relationship is over, I guess that’s not happening.”

Dean widened his eyes. “Fuck chocolate. Let’s make out.”

“No. I’m afraid it’s too late. There’s no way to repair this. The damage has been done.”

“I take it back. I take it all back. Come here.” Dean slid across the seat to get closer to Castiel, who was holding back his laughter as he pretended to ignore Dean. “I’ll never have chocolate again if you take me back.”

“Oh, please. You couldn’t give up chocolate.”

Dean considered this. “Okay. Maybe not.” And then he took a few licks of his ice cream. “It’s melting. I gotta eat it.”

“You’re a filthy liar,” Castiel said, leaning forward to lick some of Dean’s dripping ice cream. “If you kissed me right now, I’d taste of chocolate. Something to think about.”

Dean groaned. “You’re killing me, Cas.”

“I’m just eating ice cream, Dean.” Castiel continued making his way through his own ice cream, licking it with more intent than before. Dean couldn’t stop watching him.

“There’s nothing I can do to change your mind?” Dean asked.

“I’ll think of something,” Castiel said, smiling.

Dean rolled his eyes and ate his ice cream. When he was done with it, cone and everything, he turned to Castiel, determined. Castiel was also done with his ice cream, and he was smirking at Dean. “I think I know what’ll make you take me back.”

“Tell me.”

“I have a solid argument,” Dean said. “You love me. I love you. We’re just two suckers who fell in love with each other. I think that’s all we need to be together. Nothing else matters. I can forgive that you don’t like chocolate if you can forgive that I do.”

Castiel made a noise of defeat. “How am I supposed to argue with that?”

“You’re not.” Dean grinned, proud of himself.

“Alright, you win.”

“Hell yeah, I do!”

Before Dean could get another word out, Castiel pulled Dean by the shoulders until their lips met. Castiel licked Dean’s lips open, kissing him sweetly. Dean could taste the pistachio ice cream combined with the chocolate one he ate, and it was a mixture of tastes. He straddled Castiel’s lap, wrapping his arms around his neck as he licked down Castiel’s jaw. Castiel made small sounds of pleasure between his quickened breaths.

Dean trailed kisses down his neck, going soft, soft, soft before he bit down on the skin. Castiel let out a sharp breath and arched his back. Dean had been dying to do that after all of those marks Castiel left on him. It was only fair that Dean returned them. Dean sucked on the skin there, and Castiel bucked his hips. Dean started to roll his hips in time with Castiel, and the friction was driving Dean crazy. Castiel was breathless as Dean continued kissing his neck.

After a few minutes of that, Castiel pulled away. “I’m refuse to come in my pants, Dean. I’m too old for that.”

“Fuck, me too,” Dean said, breathing against Castiel’s neck. He knew the reasonable thing to do was stop and take it home. But Dean was already hard, and it would take some time for him to be able to drive them home. They’d probably lose the momentum. It didn’t matter, though, because they weren’t fucking teenagers, so they really shouldn’t act like such.

“Let’s get in the backseat,” Castiel said, taking Dean by surprise.

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah, why not? We’re going to finish this one way or the other, right?” Before Dean could answer, Castiel was already moving to the back.

Dean crawled to the backseat after him, and they fell onto the seats comfortably. They moved around until Dean was underneath Castiel, who had him pinned and was kissing him senseless. Castiel slid a hand down Dean’s torso, touching him everywhere he could before he reached the button of Dean’s pants. It didn’t take him long to unbutton him and unzip him, and then he grabbed Dean’s cock in his hands. Dean gasped into his mouth, arching up.

It took all of Dean’s concentration to find Castiel’s zipper and do the same for him. Once he had him in his hands, Castiel mirrored Dean’s movements. Then Castiel moved Dean’s hand away and took both of their cocks into his hand, stroking them at the same time. Dean bit Castiel’s lower lip and threaded his fingers through his soft hair that was undone due to the wind.

It didn’t take long for Dean to come, and Castiel came soon after him, both of them moaning into each other’s mouths to stifle the sounds. Castiel collapsed onto Dean, and Dean loved having the weight of him on top of him again. He’d never get tired of this.

Castiel laughed into the crook of Dean’s neck, a soft sound that made Dean smile. “I can’t believe we did that.”

“Which part?”

“I’ve never had sex in a car before.”

“You seemed very determined when you suggested it.” Dean pushed some of Castiel’s sweaty hair away from his forehead.

“I don’t know if you knew this, but I’m crazy about you,” Castiel said, repeating Dean’s earlier words.

“I was hoping you were.”

Castiel kissed his lips lazily. “I’m starting to like your car.”

“I like having you in here. Feels right.”

Castiel looked at him for a while. Dean liked having his blue eyes looking at him intensely. “Thank you for tonight. You didn’t have to put up with Gabriel, but you did, anyway.”

“I was glad to do it, Cas. Will I ever meet your other brother?”

“Michael? I don’t know. He lives in New York. I rarely get to see him. We do Skype a lot.”

“Shit. I guess I’ll have to get used to that, too.”

Castiel kissed Dean’s forehead. “I’ll see you so much you won’t need to Skype me.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yes.”

“We should really clean up.”

Castiel took off his blue shirt, leaving him in a thin white shirt. “You can use my shirt.”

Dean started cleaning them both up, when he remembered their conversation from that morning. “Didn’t you say you were willing to be propositioned until this weekend?”

“Can you blame me? I get a few minutes alone with you and I turn into a fucking teenager.”

“Well, if it helps, the feeling’s mutual.”

Castiel didn’t say anything, but he looked at Dean like he was his favorite ice cream flavor. Dean also knew the feeling.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's been a while, i know. if you're wondering what the hell happened to me, click [here](http://raiseyourpinky.tumblr.com/post/181666131293/more-im-going-to-try-to-keep-this-short-and). if not, keep reading. happy new year, guys!

The next day, Dean drove home after work with Castiel. It was still thrilling having him in his passenger seat. Dean reached over to grab Castiel’s hand as he drove, and he held it for the entire ride home.

When Dean pulled into his driveway, he took a deep breath and turned to Castiel. “How do you feel?”

Castiel squeezed his hand. “I’m not as nervous as I thought I’d be. After all, I’ve already met your family. This is more of a technicality.”

Dean hesitated. “I haven’t told you about this yet, but I think you should know. Sam wasn’t really into the idea of us dating long-distance. I don’t think he’ll say anything about it, but I wanted to give you the heads up in case he does.”

Frowning, Castiel nodded. “Is your brother worried it won’t work out in the long run?”

Dean shrugged. “I guess. I’m sure he’s just being overprotective.”

“Does it bother you that he’s against this?” Castiel rubbed his thumb over Dean’s hand.

Dean pondered that, staring at their joined hands on the seat. “A bit. But I’m prepared to prove him wrong if you are.”      

Castiel lifted Dean’s chin, smiling at him with a smile that Dean knew was uniquely for him. “I’m not letting you go, Dean.” Then his face grew serious. “I know our relationship is fairly new, but I’ve never been more sure about anything in my life.”

Dean’s heart fluttered, as though he were in high school and his crush had just confessed his true feelings for him. “You’re pretty great, you know that?”

“Oh, I do.”

“And smug. Did I mention that?”

“Once or twice.”

As soon as they were out of the car, Dean tugged his arms around Castiel’s waist and pulled him close, right on his front porch. He needed this closeness to prepare for whatever would happen inside. Though maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. Not with the way Castiel looked into his eyes right before kissing his temple.

“We can’t keep stalling,” Castiel said.

Dean sighed. “I know.”

Before he could open the door, it flung open. Dean’s mom stood there, ushering them inside, complaining that they’re all hungry and were just waiting on them to start eating.

“Mom, it’s not our fault all of you eat so early,” Dean said, taking a seat at the table across from Sam, who sat next to Jess. Dean’s mom positioned Castiel next to Dean, and then she took the empty stop at the head of the table. There were full plates in front of all of them. It was his mom’s famous chicken casserole. Dean hadn’t had it in over a year, probably. His mouth was nearly salivating.

“Eat up, everyone,” she said. “But leave lots of room for dessert.”

Dean turned his attention away from the delicious meal in front of him. “Dessert?”

She grinned. “Apple pie.”

Dean wanted to cry. But he wouldn’t. “What the hell did I do to deserve all this?”

“Mom’s just spoiling you, like always,” Sam said.

“Are you jealous because you’re not the favorite son?” Dean asked.

Sam glared. “Don’t make me throw this fork at you in front of your boyfriend.”

“Oh, don’t mind me,” Castiel said. “I’m very entertained right now.”

“Cas, sweetheart, I’m glad you could join us for dinner tonight.”

Castiel smiled at Dean’s mom, full of sincerity. “Thank you for inviting me. I was looking forward to getting to spend more time with all of you.”

“I found Dean’s baby photos in his closet, and you are so in for a treat,” Jess said.

“Hey! What were you doing in my closet?” Dean asked.

Jess laughed. “What do you think I was doing? I was looking for your baby photos. Sam helped me.”

“I’m gonna kill both of you, right after I finish eating.”

Jess rolled her eyes and Sam smirked.

“I would _love_ to see those,” Castiel said, sipping his water.

Dean shook his head. “You’re lucky I have that pie to look forward to, or I’d be more upset about this.”

Castiel smiled, combing Dean’s hair. It was an intimate gesture and it made Dean shiver a little. “I promise I won’t make fun of your baby photos. I’m sure you were a beautiful baby.”

“He really was,” his mom said, full of unhidden pride.

“Don’t let it get to your head,” Sam said.

“Boys,” their mom said, sternly. Then she looked at Castiel, a kind smile on her face. “Cas, I just want you to know that I’ve never seen my son happier. From the moment I met you, I saw something good in you. Something earnest. I think I saw what you felt for each other, even before you two knuckleheads realized it.”

Dean looked at Castiel and found that he was already looking at him. Dean was filled with a rush of emotions. And then the sudden memory of the first day they met. He burst into laughter.

“What’s so funny?” Castiel asked.

“I don’t think I ever told you guys,” Dean said, “but Cas and I hated each other for a long time.”

“Really?” Sam asked.

“That can’t be true,” Jess said.

“We didn’t hate each other,” Castiel explained. “We just didn’t see eye-to-eye at first.”

“We kind of hated each other,” Dean said. “Though I think I was harboring an enormous crush on him that I didn’t realize existed.”

“It was easier to pretend to hate him because I had to sit with him every single day at work. Sometimes I felt like I was being punished by the universe. Especially when he wore my favorite green shirt and it brought out his eyes.” Castiel shook his head. “Oh, the torture I went through.”

Dean’s lips spread into a smile. He’d never heard about this. “You liked my green shirt?”

“I think I spilled salad dressing on it one time,” Castiel said. “I was hoping it would ruin it, but it didn’t. You kept wearing it.”

“That is so sweet,” Jess said.

“That he tried to ruin Dean’s shirt?” Sam asked.

“That they both had feelings for each other but had to pretend to hate each other.”

“Is that sweet?” Sam asked. “They should have clearly made a move sooner.”

Dean spoke with a mouthful. “Look, man, you try making a move on a guy who has openly hated your guts for three years and see how hard it is.”

“I can be pretty intimidating,” Castiel admitted.

“Well, you sure fooled me,” their mom said. “Seeing you two, I could have sworn it was love at first sight.”

Castiel opened his mouth to say something, blushed, and then looked down at his plate, taking a small bite. Dean wondered if Castiel was about to correct her. Dean wanted to. He wanted to tell his mom, in front of everyone, that he started falling for Castiel from that first day. It was so clear now.

But Dean held his tongue, and so did Castiel. There were a lot of unspoken words between them. But then, Castiel looked at Dean and he had a playful gleam in his eyes. Sometimes their unspoken words said more about their feelings than they were able to admit.


End file.
